The Mancunion

Britain's biggest student newspaper, serving Greater Manchester

Catwalk of Shame

Gráinne Morrison discusses the dilemma of the morning after.

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A rite of passage, some might say, the ‘Walk of Shame’ is an experience akin to the nightmare in which you find yourself naked in the middle of an exam hall. Except in this case, it is your raucous exploits that are exposed instead of your bare skin (although this does depend on which club night you attended). Whether you’ve had a night of drunken passion or have simply passed out in your friend’s kitchen (usually the latter), we’ve all found ourselves strolling the streets of Manchester looking anything but sexy, never mind sane. Harvey Nichols’ Christmas ad in 2011, met by much controversy, highlighted the dos and don’ts of walking home the morning after the night before.

Sadly, most of us resemble the don’ts. Why? Often similar to your choice of partner, last night’s vamped-up hair and makeup just does not quite translate in the cold light of day. Or, even worse, you may have finally bagged the person of your dreams but are worried you have the face of their nightmares. Like in the opening scene of Bridesmaids, one’s first instinct will be to slyly reapply the face so meticulously put on the previous night. However, placing more makeup over last night’s stale makeup will only make matters worse. A make up wipe or even just some tissue paper and moisturiser are your best bet, a clear face is always better than blotches of lipstick and mascara covered up half-heartedly by concealer.

Then there’s the dangerous dash home in which you are guaranteed to see everyone you know. Is there truly a way of pulling off a walk notorious for its cringe-inducing effects? Is a life of clean living and chastity our only option? There are a few things to try if you insist on a life of debauchery, filled with many of these turmoil-fuelled mornings. A purse friendly jar of Nivea crème never goes amiss, mints and a mini hairbrush (always needed during a night out anyway). Minimalists in the beauty department always win in the morning-after stakes, the less makeup you wear the less mess it can cause. And it goes without saying that the more casually dressed goers-out will have less of an ordeal – but where’s the fun in that?