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Month: September 2013

Review: Dimensions Festival

5th-9th September

Fort Punta Christo, Pula

9/10

Dimensions, sister festival from the team behind Outlook, returns to the beautiful setting of Fort Punta Christo to deliver one of the most impressive house and techno driven line ups in the world. The locations of luxurious beaches and an abandoned fort provided the perfect backdrop to the summery house and darker techno music on display.

Highlight of the first night is Move D who spins a masterful set of euphoria inducing tunes such as ‘Want You In My Soul’ and Armand Van Helden’s club classic ‘You Don’t Know Me’. The German’s enthusiasm is infectious and the crowd mirrors his joyous, prancing stage presence. Another Thursday highlight is Innervisions honcho Dixon who treats the crowd to a full 3 hours of blissful house in the sunrise slot.

Friday’s beach parties see Manchester’s own Hoya:Hoya residents deploy setting appropriate disco led sets on the coast. In stark contrast, the evening show is stolen by the pounding techno of Surgeon and Blawan in The Moat. The 30-metre deep stage intensifies the wall of sound each DJ creates to mind-blowing effect. A notable moment elsewhere occurs when Jimmy Edgar drops Aphex Twin’s unparalleled banger ‘Windowlicker’.

Across Saturday and Sunday the intensity doesn’t let up; ‘Bring’ by Randomer establishes itself as song of the festival as multiple DJs, including Pariah, draw for it as a mid-set highlight. Only one disaster arises when Omar S’ set time is changed at the last minute meaning I miss him. However, Martyn proves to be a fine alternative with his slowed down version of ‘Hackney Parrot (Special Request VIP)’ sending a bassy wave rippling through the assembled revellers. Detroit super-collective 3 Chairs, comprised of Moodymann, Rick Wilhite, Marcellus Pittman and Theo Parrish, close the festival in style. The threatened storms hold off and the light drizzle that does descend only heightens the elation of those left standing at 6am Monday morning.

Feature: Looking Beyond Warehouse

With The Warehouse Project season due to start in the coming weeks there is a conspicuous whiff of ecstasy amongst students and party goers alike. It’s common knowledge by now that The Warehouse Project has flooded Manchester’s underground music market, yet whether this is beneficial or not is up for debate. I’m certainly not going to argue against the consistent quality of their bills – fuck it, at the risk of sounding massively contradictory, I’ve already bought three tickets and intend to go to more nights.

However, one of The Warehouse Project’s greatest appeals, its sheer scale, is also its largest downfall as competitors struggle to swim against the huge wave that The Warehouse brand has created. The most obvious evidence of this battle was the recent closure of one of Manchester’s most recognisable clubs in Sankeys, the venue that was described as Manchester’s original ‘super-club’. Sankeys’ downfall may not have been entirely down to The Warehouse Project but the level of competition over bookings and punters inevitably took its toll. Indeed, it seems for many that it has become hard to look past The Warehouse Project for a student-loan-blowing night out and this, for me at least, is a shame in a city of such broad and passionate musical history.

Take nights such as Meandyou or Chow Down that have both worked hard to provide intimate, original and creative nights that are always bound with an interest for underground music rather than profit. Certainly, the presence of The Warehouse Project has created a mindset that dictates that more is better when in reality seeing the likes of Ben UFO or Plastician in a closer environment can be just as, if not more, gratifying than going to a twenty headliner strong Warehouse night. Indeed, this argument can be cast off as mere opinion but the underlying repercussions of The Warehouse Project’s dominance is clear as limitations over bookings make it hard for new nights to come to fruition. Admittedly this is not an entirely new concern but with the growth of The Warehouse Project continuing to surge, the question of smaller nights vulnerability is noticeable. From Soup Kitchen to The Mint Lounge, music is always going to remain at the fore of a clubber’s itinerary, but what can make a cities electronic scene great is diversity between venues, DJ’s and promoters. If there is a danger of The Warehouse Project controlling any more of the market, then the risk of Manchester’s entire scene being saturated into a single brand could spell the end to the cities once diverse musical movements.

So next time you’re debating over Modeselektion or Annie Mac Presents, spare a thought for a lesser night that could turn out to be more.

Review: Beacons Festival

16th-18th August

Heslaker Farm, Skipton

6/10

Beacons Festival returns to Funkirk Estate, a quaint farm near the Yorkshire Dales. In its second year, an impressive line up has expanded its capacity and reputation.

Though described as an ‘art and music’ event, the site feels drab and uninspired. Some effort has been made to make the main arena- a field- feel like a festival, but more than the odd art installation is required. A ‘pop-up’ Urban Outfitters doesn’t help. Aren’t festivals an escape from such high-street normality? The painfully homogeneous crowd- students- only reinforces that feeling.

Thankfully, the music in the Resident Advisor tent goes a good way to make up for this. New York hotshot Anthony Naples kicks off Friday’s antics, making a strong selection of gritty, grooving tunes. Move D follows with a three-hour master class possible of only a true veteran. John Talabot’s closing set keeps the crowd moving until the fun is stopped by the far-too-early 2am curfew. No sunrise raving at Beacons.

Saturday’s highlights are house-revivalists Bicep and Hessle Audio big man Ben UFO. In a trademark stompy set, Bicep find the time to drop Scuba’s rave-pastiche anthem ‘NE1BUTU’. It goes off. Ben UFO’s darker cuts make for a fascinating change of tone and as the crowd lap up every pounding kick drum, there’s no need for sing-a-longs here.

Andrés and Theo Parrish embark upon a five hour journey through only the most soulful hip-hop, house and techno to close the festival on Sunday. For a very different ride, James Holden delivers his euphoric, trance-influenced progression outside on the RBMA stage. Finding an act to provide that weekend climax any better would be near impossible.

It’s clear Beacons has the music side of things sorted, but a truly great festival is a lot more than this. Bring on the day this twigs with the organisers.

Album: Arctic Monkeys – AM

Released September 9th, 2013.

Domino

3/10

Arctic Monkeys came along at a perfect time; call them indie, post-punk revivalists, whatever – their brand of urgent, angular rock stirred something in the hearts and minds of teenagers and bored middle-aged musos alike. In a decade where TV exec’s actually sought after Geordie narrators for their shows, a strong sense of identity had never been more important. Unfortunately, these cheeky Sheffield chaps have lost whatever charm they once had.

AM is Arctic’s fifth record, and the alarm bells were ringing at Suck It and See frankly. It’s fair to say the first two albums are in essence the definitive work of the Arctic Monkeys. Humbug’s psychedelic twist gave the band a whole new lease of life, displaying an ability to evolve and expand musically. Then you hit Suck It and See, a well-crafted album, but nevertheless one that seemed sterile and safe in comparison. And that brings me to AM, which with great sadness I report, is even worse.

The album opens with a plodding Sabbath-esque beat over which a limp-wristed, pansy riff is thrown. ‘Do I wanna Know?’ sets the tone for what’s to come; it’s brooding, but not intense – my gut reaction is half arsed. The band never climb out of second gear; ‘One For the Road’ is another head hanging track that is frustratingly sparse, relying on embellishments from Jamie Cook to lift the monotony, especially on ‘Knee Socks’.

Sonically the downfall seems to lie with the people the Arctics have become associated with. Tchad Blake (Black Keys producer) and Josh Homme’s influence has swamped the bands sound and ultimately sucked away everything that sold them to us all those years ago.

The riffs are simple, and almost all of which could be played by a novice on one string (not necessarily a bad thing); the beat is industrial and cold, but the sound is polished and clean which just doesn’t add up. ‘Cannon’ by the White Stripes is a great example of how this kind of song writing can work when done raw and with passion; AM comes across like Arctic Monkeys doing a mishmash of other peoples work and forgetting to put their own two cents into the ring.

Alex Turner’s lyrics are like marmite and stay as colloquial as ever on this record, but the echo on almost every vocal, backed by another falsetto voice becomes repetitive and extremely annoying. As standard nowadays we’re treated to a few pleasant ballads, most notably  ‘I Wanna Be Yours’ but unfortunately the likes of which don’t stand up to, or feel half as sincere as songs such as ‘Cornerstone’ and ‘Love Is a Laserquest’.

Arcade Fire’s latest drop ‘Reflektor’ goes to shows  how evolution and change doesn’t haven’t to compromise a bands core sound, and the merits which made them great – with Arctic’s recent releases it seems the band are stagnating and becoming more and more irrelevant by the minute.

Am oozes coolness and sexiness but also a total reluctance to overreach itself – it’s a slippers on, let’s watch an ITV drama approach to Rock, which may appear aesthetically pleasing to some fans, but honestly I advise anyone who is planning to sit through the whole record in one go to have some KC & The Sunshine Band at the ready, you’re going to need something to wake you up.

 

 

Making Fashion Affordable

We all know that fashion trends are constantly changing so being a fashion conscious student can be hard, but there are ways to afford the latest must have item and snub the idea that to be fashionable one must have a fat bank balance.

Here are a few ways one can be fashion savvy on a budget:

A big incentive to keep buying into fashion trends comes with our nifty student discount that can save you up to 25% off some fashion brands. Unidays is the place to visit online detailing the latest student discount promotions, they change frequently so it is a good idea to sign up to their mailing list to be the first in the know. Don’t miss out on 20% off at Urban Outfitters available at the moment.

If you need that make up fix fashion magazines are the place to look. Magazines such as Glamour and Cosmopolitan frequently include mascara or a nail polish that will add that instant breath of fresh air to any outfit. In the past Glamour has come with Benefit makeup, so for a steal of £2 you could walk away with an eyeliner or mascara retailing at £17.50!

                          

 

Finally if it’s that pair of Converse that you don’t want to spend £40 on, or a pair of high waisted denim shorts you must have then give eBay a go. It is a great way to buy budget-friendly items in a convenient and practical way. To save trawling through pages of products you get the best results if you have a specific brand and item in mind and know the size you need.  eBay is the one-stop-shop for snapping up a bargain. Good luck!

Bohemian Grove @ Islington Mill

The Bohemian Groves night at Salford’s Islington Mills on Friday 20th September confirmed that this venue, drawn attention to in the Mancunion’s venue guide, is one of Manchester’s creative hidden treasures. Of course the music played by ‘artist of sound’ Traxx was a huge part to play in the mind-blowing experience of the night but additionally the contemporary, simplistic space and the use of video projections delivered a vibe which is unique to the Manchester music scene. The modest but spacious one room studio space allowed for no distractions from the music and a sense of unity from the crowd. The visuals created and controlled live by KHOM (touring visual engineer) were in his words a “visualization of the music”. Although visually pleasing, they were not there to be an artistic focus but to enhance the musical experience and add to the atmosphere, which they certainly did. This was made possible by the projections working in time with the music, KHOM said “doing it live allows me to follow the music and change the visuals accordingly”.

 

Islington Mill as a venue and its light shows demonstrated how the visual can affect our experience of music. The music was the main event but the spectacle of the performance transformed what would have just been a great night into a great experience at Islington Mill.

 

Nancy Barnes

 

Ladbrokes: How to really profit off a University Education

Ever wondered how to really make money of your university degree? Ladbrokes appear to have found a solution.

In a new Ladbrokes betting service, students entering their first year can bet on – or have a bet placed on – what their final degree classification will be.

“We always get requests for degree bets at this time of year so we thought we’d launch a dedicated service with a ‘microsite’ for the first time to cater for the demand,” said Alex Donohue of Ladbrokes.

The online service uses a computer algorithm to calculate the odds of a given student getting anything from a first to a third. All a bettor need do is enter the name of the university, course and three best A-levels  – and to collect any winnings, produce relevant graduation documents.

The betting giant said they are targeting the scheme not at students, but at their parents, friends, and family – who would not need permission to place bets.

Donohue added, “Instead of the bank of mum and dad, this service could help give parents some return as they bank on their children’s academic progress.”

The bookmaker is trialling the scheme with what they consider to be 20 of the country’s most popular universities – including University of Manchester – in a two-month test period ending in October.

There is currently a maximum stake of £10 and return of £1000, but to win this would require odds of 100/1, which for the average student is not offered.

When The Mancunion tried out the odds calculator, the best return for University of Manchester was a straight-A student studying Medicine or Law, where the odds of a first were 11/2 and for a third 9/1, respectively.

The average stake placed so far has been between £5 and £10, and there are no plans to increase the limit, Ladbrokes said in a statement to The Mancunion.

“We don’t think that increasing the stake would have any bearing on developing this project,” they said, adding, “As for the future, the most logical step is to expand the number of courses and subjects.”

When asked about concerns raised by gambling awareness charities, such as Gamcare, that the scheme will encourage gambling among students, the bookmaker declined to comment, saying only, “The service isn’taimed at students directly but their parents [and] family.”

The volumes of gamblers using the scheme is unclear, however the bookmaker said, “We are currently equipped to deal with a volume of bets up to 5/6 times more than we are currently taking.”

Speaking to The Mancunion, 3rd year Manchester student Robert Clark was unsure about the scheme.

“I don’t believe that it is ethical for parents to be betting on their children and it also creates new pressures for students to perform for their parents,” Clark said.

Second-year Manchester Student Brian Cunningham felt the money might help as an incentive to study harder.

“Financial motivation to get a higher grade in my degree would definitely make me work harder,” he said.

Bets where the student in question fails to complete their degree or changes course will be considered as losers, said Ladbrokes.

DIY: layered chain necklace

Making your own jewellery is a great way to increase your array of accessories without the price tag. It’s really simple and you can buy all sorts of different coloured and sized chains, beads and ribbons from the bead shop in Affleck’s Palace. Here is a step-by-step guide of how to create a statement necklace within minutes.

What you will need:
– Chain cutters
– 3 pieces of silver chain, different sizes
– 2 jump rings
– A clasp

Step 1:
Get the largest chain and cut a piece 16 inches long. Then cut the medium sized chain to 17 inches and the smallest to 18 inches. When the chains are laid out they should look like the above picture. Making them different lengths will
allow the chains to layer and hang nicely.

Step 2:

Open up one of the jump rings and put the chains on it in order of size, starting with the largest. When you close the jump ring all the chains should be held together in the correct order. Repeat on the other side making sure to keep the same order.

Step 3:
On one of the jump rings attach the clasp that you can then use to put on and take off your necklace by attaching it to the other jump ring. And voila, you have a new, original statement necklace.

Wear with a black roll neck jumper, tartan trousers and some cut out boots for a perfect winter-chic look. You can also embellish the necklace with studs or beads to make it more detailed.

Opinion: Giving Classical A Chance

Birthplace of the rave revolution, there’s no denying Manchester is widely celebrated for its music scene. Whilst the city hosted the first ever UK premiere of Puccini’s revolutionary La bohème in the 19th Century, bands such as the Happy Mondays, Oasis and The Smiths have secured the city in Pop Music history for it’s legendary ‘Madchester’ scene.

Why then, when you ask the average ManUni student about the music in Manchester, do they reply solely naming clubs such as Deaf Institute, the Warehouse Project and Sankeys (RIP)? Where I ask, is the mention of institutes equally as legendary the Bridgewater Hall and The Lowry, where the vibrancy of Manchester’s classical scene is almost unparalleled?

My opinion is that young people in Manchester don’t give Classical music a chance. As a Music student of predominantly Classical here at Manchester, I also consider myself a lover of Techno, Drum and Bass and just about every other musical genre that has come into being, (with the exception of Heavy Metal). I listen to the Ministry of Sound compilations as passionately as I would my favourite Italian opera. Therefore, it really pains me to see rows of empty seats in Manchester’s Classical venues. Especially after having seen hundreds of the uni’s most passionate music lovers at Warehouse Project the night before.

Why do Manchester’s students so passionately engage with one music scene but not the other? Outside gigs and clubs, the choice is enormous and there are plenty of ways to experience and appreciate alternative forms of music. The gleaming glass of the Bridgewater Hall hosts a phenomenal concert series, where contemporary international superstars rub shoulders with the Manchester-based Hallé and BBC Philharmonic orchestras. Similarly, if you prefer Les Misérables to Mozart, a range of show-stopping musicals can be found at the Palace Theatre and operas at Opera North, based at The Lowry.

Contrary to popular belief, these events have regular student discounts and are no more expensive than your average Pop or Rock gig. In fact, Manchester Uni itself hosts a free lunchtime concert every Thursday, fully paid for and marketed by the University that features the world renowned Danel Quartet. Therefore, the problem obviously lies not in the marketing, quality or pricing of Classical events.

Instead it all ties in to music and sub-culture. Popular music in all it’s strands has deep-seated sub-culture in fashion and society. Just as this sub-culture leads to the average hipster annoyingly explaining how he’s “always loved Deep House” before it’s recent popularity, Classical music has been written off by today’s youth for it’s lack of underground associations. In other words, it’s not “cool” to like Beethoven.

Now, I’m not saying that all students go to concerts for the underground culture or that none go to Classical events as many of my fellow Music students do. However, I do believe that love for music should always be for music’s sake and the majority of Manchester’s students have been too narrow-minded to embrace the Classical scene that incorporates just as many varying strands as the Popular Music scene today.

If you love Techno independent of the rave culture, why not try some Minimalism? Not only will you experience something new but you may find something you like. And if you’re not up to the challenge of trying, you’re not a true Music lover at all.

Psychic readings: regurgitated rubbish or an individual’s insight?

I have always had the psychic bug. That is, I have always wanted to go and see one. I am fascinated by the idea that someone can see into your past, present and future. Recently, I finally plucked up the courage to go and see not one, but two, and compare the readings. Is it simply a case of cold reading as Derren Brown suggests, or is there something more to it?

The cold reader, as Derren Brown puts it in his discussion with Richard Dawkins, ‘supplies a lot of words’ which the individual concerned then supplies the meaning to. This is how a complete stranger can ‘seemingly’ tell you ‘everything about yourself without being psychic.’ He describes cold reading as a ‘set of linguistic tricks’ which are ‘very easy to fall for,’ but imply that a complete stranger knows everything about you.

Brown also refers to the barnum statement, which allows you ‘to have both sides of the coin in one go.’ He uses the example of telling someone that they have both extrovert and introvert sides. He argues that these traits ‘cancel each other out’ but can be disguised as a personal hit when really, they can be applied to any old Tom, Dick or Harry.

The question is did I experience any cold reading when I went to see either psychic? I had not watched the interview or researched cold reading prior to my visits, as I wanted to go in with an open mind. Brown says that how you feel about the accuracy of your reading usually depends on whether you go in as a believer or a sceptic; the believer will do everything they can to grab at what is being said. I went in as a fence sitter; I am aware that some psychics are merely tricksters who ‘comfort’ their clients with lie after lie, encouraging them to part with wads of their hard earned cash. I am also aware that people I know have had psychic predictions come true.

Psychic number one was recommended to me by my mum’s friend. I was asked for my first name and star sign. When I turned up I realised that she was the mum of somebody I had gone to primary and secondary school with. She already knew some things about me – a problematic start.

She started to talk about my personality, saying that I could be impulsive and outspoken, but although I come across as a very confident and happy person, I am sometimes sad on the inside. She said that people don’t ask how I am because they always assume that I am okay; while some people build walls, I build a ‘wall then a moat then a river’. She said that I needed to stop being one of the lads (true – male friends, I blame you), stop giving mixed signals to guys and not assume that they are all out to hurt me. She then went on to remark that I shouldn’t be so trusting of people and that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. Initially, I thought this sounded very much like me, but in hindsight, this appears to be a case of extrovert/introvert. Don’t we all put on fronts from time to time, haven’t we all been hurt and don’t we all experience happiness and sadness?

Despite this, she did go on to talk about people and situations in my life that I’m sure she could not have known about. Of course, there were some things which didn’t ring completely true, but there were a lot that did. The thing that I found most intriguing was that these things also cropped up in the second reading. Both of the psychics spoke about a car I was going to buy with money left or given to me, further study, a role in the communications industry, different job opportunities and travel, a particular friend from the past who was going to make a reappearance in my life and moving into my new house, where someone was going to try and take money from me. The second psychic (who didn’t know me and asked only for my first name), gave me instructions as to where to hide my money and most treasured possessions; a thief was going to break into my room. She was able to describe the area that I was moving to and the people in it. In addition, both of the psychics mentioned a young friend or relation who pregnant and were able to tell me things about their future once the baby was born. My younger cousin is due this week. They even agreed on the smaller details, telling me that I would chip or break a tooth and that I needed to get my eyes tested.

The second psychic did not tell me anything about my personality, but instead simply told me about my past, present and future. She was able to give the hair colours and initials of the people she was speaking about, as well as their relation to me. She was able to tell me about the men I would encounter in my life, the countries I would visit, the friends I would keep and the new relationships I would form. She told me that she knew I would be making a trip to the North of England soon – low and behold, I’m coming back to Manchester. She knew I was studying without me having to reveal anything about myself and she told me that I had a talent for language. I’m an English student. She was also able to tell me that I wouldn’t become a journalist; I am an honest person and it would go against my grain to be told to write untruths. She then went on to say that she could envisage me teaching or giving training to a group of people in the future. I was really spun out when she told me about my future husband, giving me his initial, an idea of his profession and talking about our wedding and three (THREE!!!) children. I was also warned that I will have a psychic experience myself later in life. Eery!

I am still a fence sitter after my experience; although it seemed positive that both psychics talked about similar things, I will have to see if any of their predictions become true before I can call myself a believer. After child number three, I might be convinced!

Student Gym Guide

The Gym Manchester

The Gym Manchester, located near Piccadilly, is a popular choice for many students. With memberships starting at only £15.99 a month you can see why it appeals to many. It’s open 24/7 for the insomniacs amongst you and offers free daily classes. Downsides? Being this cheap, The Gym is what it says on the tin: no pool, sauna, steam room or spa. It advertises its memberships as being ‘contract free’ meaning you are able to cancel at any time without being charged. However, if you cancel and rejoin you’ll have to pay £20 joining fee again or alternatively can pay £5 a month to ‘freeze’ your membership (to avoid this cost and keep your place).

Sugden Sports Centre

Just up the road from Deaf Institute, Sugden is a good choice for those who want to spend an hour between lectures working out. The centre is currently offering nine month memberships for £155 (which works out at £17.22/month) or twelve month memberships for £165 (£13.75/month). Payment is made up front so you need to be committed to going or risk wasting your money. Again, there are no spa facilities or swimming pool but the centre does offer two sports halls, four squash courts and a 5-a-side football pitch (recently used in a Nike advert). Drop in classes are pay-as-you-go and priced at £3.30 for students.

Armitage Fitness Suite

The Armitage Centre can be found in the Fallowfield campus so is extremely handy for those living in halls. The site offers the same facilities as Sugden. Memberships are also paid in full up front: £150 for nine months peak membership, £155 for twelve and £110 and £120 for off-peak. Drop in classes are also £3.30.

Regardless of your year, for those living in Fallowfield/Withington, I would recommend Armitage. Whilst The Gym’s price is tempting, it’s unlikely you’ll make the effort to get to Piccadilly and unless you shower there, you’ll have to get on a Magic Bus looking red and feeling grim. Sugden’s location presents a similar problem unless you really are a lecture/gym hopper. Reasonably priced, well equipped and close to home, Armitage seems to be the best and most popular option.

Top 5 Evil Blondes

1. Alex Forrest – Fatal Attraction (1987)

She takes the phrase ‘bitches be crazy’ to a whole new level. In probably the most effective anti-adultery campaign ever launched, Glenn Close plays an obsessive, determined mistress, who’ll stop at no lengths to get her man. Under different circumstances, this might have made a good romantic comedy. Perhaps without the bunny boiling.

 

2. Debbie ‘Black Widow’ Jellinsky  – The Addams Family Values (1993)

Gold digger, murderer; call her what you want. She is pure, meaningless evil in the form of Joan Cusack. If you haven’t seen this film in a long time re-watch it and you’ll be amazed at how funny it is.

3. Buffalo Bill – The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Of all movie serial killers you could be imprisoned by, he might just be the worst. You can’t be a serial killer without a sufficient level of creepiness, and this guys got it in abundance.

4. Draco Malfoy – Harry Potter (2001-11)

Not in any way inherently evil. He shouldn’t even be on this list, but it would not be complete without him. Magic or not, Draco is your stereotypical high school bully who dabbles in the dark arts. Who doesn’t love a good bully? He’s the magic version of Karate Kids blonde villain Johnny Lawrence; a true case for nature vs. nurture.

Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter’s blonde nemesis

 

5. Silva – Skyfall (2012)

I was one of the few unimpressed by Javier Bardem’s caricaturish portrayal of a Bond villain. He seemed as though all he needed was a little persuasion and he would have abandoned his evil plan. His blonde wig was the most villainous thing about him.

 

 

Horoscope Forecasts With Mystic Moya

LIBRA (24 SEPTEMBER – 23 OCTOBER)

If it’s your birthday this week, you’ll probably spend the day at uni wondering why strangers aren’t being nicer to you. It’s because they don’t know it’s your birthday. Get a big badge. You expect your friends to buy you drinks all night, but it doesn’t quite work out that way.

SCORPIO (24 OCTOBER – 22 NOVEMBER)

Yours is one of the most sensual and passionate signs of the zodiac. But when you roll in at 4am with some randomer you found in Pout and keep your housemates up all night with your cries of passion, they will talk about you behind your back, and possibly spit in your tea.

SAGITTARIUS (23 NOVEMBER – 21 DECEMBER)

Venus starts heading towards Uranus on Wednesday (hehehe), making this a perfect week to make new friends. If you find yourself sitting next to a stranger in a lecture, strike up a conversation! Being British, they will inevitably think you’re insane and avoid you for the rest of the year,  but it’s worth a try.

CAPRICORN (22 DECEMBER – 20 JANUARY)

You will wake up feeling groggy, nauseous and confused at least three mornings this week.

AQUARIUS (21 JANUARY – 19 FEBRUARY)

You like to play it cool when it comes to matters of the heart, but be careful. You may believe you’re projecting an aura of mysterious unavailability, but the object of your affections might just think you’re a dick.

PISCES (20 FEBRUARY – 20 MARCH)

You’ve always found it annoying that the lifestyle you want maybe isn’t– actually, definitely isn’t – the lifestyle you can afford. Don’t worry! You can always extend your overdraft. Or actually, get a job, you bum.

ARIES (21 MARCH – 20 APRIL)

Classes start properly this week, and you’ll catch someone’s eye in one of your seminars. Unfortunately, it won’t be the hot, mysterious student who always wears great trainers. It’ll be the weird guy who always puts his hand up and smells of damp.

TAURUS (21 APRIL – 21 MAY)

Taureans are often described as being “earthy”, but it is possible to take this too far. Regular showers are a good thing, you know, for you and everyone around you.

GEMINI (22 MAY – 21 JUNE)

Mercury is rising in Gemini’s moon this week, which could mean trouble for communication. Calls and texts will dry up. Your hilarious Snapchats will go opened but unanswered. If there was such a thing as virtual tumbleweed, it would be rolling across your Facebook news feed. It’s probably down to Mercury. Or it could be that no one really likes you.

CANCER (22 JUNE – 22 JULY)

Cancer is one of the more temperamental signs of the zodiac, but you don’t have to be so moody. Stay in high spirits this week by attempting to see daylight, eating lots of fruit and vegetables, calling your parents, stopping to pat friendly cats and dancing to Stevie Wonder in the kitchen.

LEO (23 JULY – 22 AUGUST)

You’re rising up. You’re back on the street. You’ve done your time, you took your chances. You went the distance, now you’re back on your feet: just you, and your will to survive. So many times it happens too fast – you change your passion for glory. Don’t lose your grip on the dreams of the past. You must fight just to keep them alive.

VIRGO (23 AUGUST – 23 SEPTEMBER)

Virgos’ star colours are greens and brown. Fashioning an outfit out of moss, leaves and bracken will leave you feeling  inescapably “you”.

Preview: Filth

Filth is the movie that critics are calling ‘A career best performance by James McAvoy’ and ‘the most original movie … of the year,’ and why shouldn’t they be?  It has the backbone written by Irvine Welsh, the writer of Trainspotting, which grew to international success in 1996, and is often cited as one of the best British films of our time.  Filth promises to be everything Trainspotting was, and more; iconic, gritty, funny, and dark, with a great British cast and crew.

The film follows Bruce Robertson (James McAvoy), a down n’ dirty Detective Sergeant, in the heart of Edinburgh.  But this is no Bad Lieutenant, Robertson makes Harvey Keitel’s character look like Mickey Mouse, in this twisted tale of crime, madness, sex and abuse.  The film also stars Jamie Bell, as Bruce’s colleague, Ray Lennox, and Eddie Marston, as Bruce’s ‘so-called’ friend, Clifford Blades.

The writer and director, John S. Baird, has promised that fans of Welsh’s novel will not be disappointed by his adaptation.  It was Irvine Welsh, on Twitter, that quoted: ‘I was very proud of the book, but the film might even be better.’  He has also compared McAvoy’s performance to Robert De Niro’s role as Travis Bickle in Taxi Driver, saying it is one of the best he’s seen, and went on to say ‘Trainspotting v Filth, that is the question everybody will be asking come October.’

We can presume that Filth will not be one for the faint hearted. In Baird’s adaptation, we can expect to see McAvoy drink himself half to death, snort cocaine off the dashboard, have perverted sex with colleagues, manipulate friends, beat the living daylights out of girlfriends, and so much more, and this is only the stuff we can see of the jam-packed, wickedly filthy, two minute-trailer available on YouTube.

 We can see by the Red Band trailers, that Filth is a film bound to live up to its name, with more cocaine use than an after-party gig with Pete Doherty, and enough bad language to make Gordon Ramsay blush.  But this is an Irvine Welsh adaptation … You don’t go to a Metallica gig, and beg they turn their guitars down, do you?

 

Travel Guide: Barcelona

Whether it’s sight-seeing that you love, visiting some of the best night clubs in Europe, or chilling out on a sunny Mediterranean beach, Barcelona is the ultimate holiday destination for students. With every nook and cranny of the city filled with architectural wonder and historical anecdotes, there is plenty to explore. Low budget airlines offer return flights starting from as little as £40 meaning this is one trip you can gain invaluable experiences from, without breaking the bank.

The city is packed with a wealth of tourist attractions so hop on a tour bus and discover some of the amazing sights that Barcelona has to offer, (trust me, it’s pretty difficult to navigate yourself to the Sagrada Familia when suffering from Barca’s vodka-induced hangover). Be enlightened by Gaudi’s breath-taking architecture, and take a walk around Park Guell where you’ll find some more of his work. Football lovers can get off the bus at the famous Camp Nou and enjoy a tour around the stadium; alternatively, shopaholics will fall in love with Diagonal Avenue, where the commercial centre comes complete with its very own Primark! However, the best way to get an authentic experience of Barcelona is to stroll around yourself: take to the Gothic Quarter and the neighbourhood of Eixample, or rent a bicycle and make your own way to the beach. Just ensure that you keep all your belongings close by, as pickpocketing in the city is a common crime.

Barcelona has possibly the craziest nightlife in Spain, so be sure not to miss out on this during your trip. Port Olympic boasts some of the best night clubs around, especially the likes of Opium Mar and Catwalk. Discover Razzmatazz, named as the only superclub in Barcelona, and one of the best places to party in Europe. One tip would be enough to get you on the guest list or you can find out the door code to bag free entry and save up to €20.

So if you want a summer holiday full of memories and experiences that will stay with you forever, forget about Malia or Ibiza, Barcelona is definitely the place to be. If there’s one thing I can guarantee, you won’t have a dull moment there.

Nido still has a long way to go

Left: ‘Montado’ dishes; top right Spanish Omlette, bottom right Croquette, and bottom left Chorizo were the best, yet did not surpass the competition.

Tapas Bars are really taking Manchester by storm; those little dishes of delight are the in thing, the cool cuisine. The small snack sized portions allows the diner and their companions to sample a whole host of different meats, vegetables, and sauces all in one sitting—variety being the spice of life really has caused Tapas to take off.

Grammatically speaking Tapas is a noun, yet I feel journalistic license allows me to move the word into the realm verbs: to Tapas. You can Tapas to your hearts content in the Northern Quarter, on or just of Deansgate, in Chorlton, West and East Didsbury, so can the restaurant landscape really cope with another Tapas Bar, are we not at saturation? If there is an overarching, yet un-poetic, analysis of these established bars it would be ‘reasonably priced, pretty damn tasty, good night out’; I think this is what Tapas Bars should be looking to achieve.

So as we marched, heads bowed against the lashing, sideways rain we approached a new Tapas venture, a Gastro-Tapas Bar, Nido, in East Didsbury. The exterior is not classy or alluring; I must confess it looks more like a Rusholme Curry House than a competitor to Casa Tapas, only up the road. Yet a book must not be judge…lest we forget El Rincon, my favourite local Tapas has an exterior of a back street garage offering dodgy MOT services.

Umbrellas down, shoes wiped, we entered to a very warm welcome of hand shakes and rather good Sangria. Very soft and fruity—the Sangria that is! We were shown the bar area which is separated from the dining space by the entrance area that is directly in front of the open view kitchen. Chef’s chopping, sautéing, caramelising everywhere, indeed when fully staffed the kitchen boasts six members, including head chef Pablo, a Spanish born chef who has trained in a myriad of top restaurants on the Iberian Peninsular, before moving the UK to forge his own culinary reputation.

We are shown to a table and then to the buffet style lay out of various tapas to tempt us into a gorging frenzy. Yet the food was unimaginatively presented on plates arranged like the spots on a ‘six domino’, wonky table clothes, and the odd lopsided tapas, fallen from its baguette plinth. My heart had yet to be stolen, but the proof would be in the pudding—and in the savoury dishes.

I first reached for the Spanish Omelette, deep and with potatoes, was seasoned beautifully. I could see this dish being served with a crisp salad and being a rather nice lunch. The Serrano ham had been carved straight from the shoulder and was velvety and salty, and utterly delicious-this was an example of a very good ingredient. Chef Pablo was enthusiastic about his ingredients, like all goods chefs should be, noting his focus at Nido is the “quality of the produce”, name dropping the Barbakan, an award winning bakery and delicatessen in Chorlton. Yet we wanted to get stuck into more of the dishes that hopefully would turn good, local ingredients into great Tapas.

Everything we sampled from the table was ‘Montado’, a flavourful topping riding on a slice of bread. The tuna-vegetable topping could be replicated at home better—the tuna seemed tinned, and the vegetables a little limp. The Croquetas de Jamón received thoroughly positive feedback from my companion, and I too admit I ventured for a second, and third. Chorizo is a beautiful thing, meaty, smoky, spicy heaven. On offer here was a solitary Cadbury chocolate finger thin sausages riding lonely and looking somewhat lost upon his slice of baguette. This was a shame as the Chorizo was tasty enough, if lacking a bit of pimenton oomph.

It would have been good planning to offer something other than the Montado at this event. And indeed Monsur, the very friendly owner obliged. He delivered to our table two plates of Paella, possibly the most iconic Spanish dish, eaten and loved the world over. That rainy Sunday afternoon, a little piece of Spain died. Paella should be served in a bowl, it should be oozing with flavoursome sea food and chorizo, well spiced and asking to be devoured. All these things were absent from our ‘paella’, it came in a tower shape, was bereft of succulent meaty content, and was presented with a fashionable smear of aioli which blew my ears off it was so pungent with raw garlic.

After having been saddened by the Paella, our hopes were lifted by the promise of a dessert, a signature dish, which will draw in repeat custom just on the strength of this one dish. Maybe the pastry end of the kitchen is where the really strong suit lies? Torrija was brought to us, with a selection of a miniature crème brulee and ice cream sat atop crisp biscuit. Torrija is a bit like French toast, it is bread soaked in milk, honey, spices, and egg then pan fried. It was crisp on the outside, soft in the middle, and thoroughly ‘cinnamony’, a good dessert indeed—but worth a visit just for that may be a stretch. The brulee was deep vanilla with a brittle caramel top and the ice cream too was vanilla. This plate was a sample of what the dessert menu can offer, it seemed a little to reliant on the deep, creamy flavours and not enough love was given to something to counter the richness. Though if you do eat here, do save room for a dessert as it is one of the best things on offer.

Now sure ‘gastro’ has been a fashionable word for eateries for a long time, it infers a superiority over those places that have not deemed themselves worthy of this prefix, yet I feel Nido still has a way to go before deserving the prefix. The prices were not cheap enough to pull in hoards of students, but the quality was not high enough to trump their competitors, and nowadays with student food interest, quality is an essential prerequisite for a restaurant hoping to benefit form student trade.

We left a little disappointed with the food as a whole, but there were good points. The service and staff were wonderfully friendly, but handshakes and smiles doesn’t cover up the fact this place has a good few creases to iron out before it can rightfully join the legion of Manchester’s established Tapas Bars.

Above left: Paella was a sorry affair. Above right: dessert was the best course on offer.

 

Politics aside, let’s talk food

Above : Tuesday’s Special, hot Pot, served with a green and coucous salad and homemade mustard dressing.

 

Resplendent with quirky art and green gingham table clothes, alive with the sound content diners tucking into their lunch, cake and coffee; the Veggie Café is a rare jewel in the otherwise relatively barren campus culinary landscape.

Proprietor Leslie Brown has run a café in the Pankhurst Building, the Contact Theatre, and has now been located in the Schunk Building since 1999. For well over a decade the Veggie Café has been serving food with locally sourced ingredients, including what Brown says is the secret, “TLC”. The intricate knowledge of each dish by the fulltime staff of five means that a whole range of dietary needs can be met because, according to Brown,  “we know exactly what is in everything, as it’s all made here”.

To announce your suppliers is to express a pride in what you produce. The bread is sourced from Brown’s local bakery near Saddleworth, the vegetables are from her local green grocer in the village of Greenfield, again local to Brown. The herb garden outside the window of the café is a delightfully renewable source of intense natural flavours that are found throughout the menu. The stock, the base of the all the soup, which is possibly the most popular dish on the menu, is sourced from Kent, a very rare stock, well worth the extra transportation as Brown exclaims it is the “best on the market”.

There is no doubt that the homemade lasagne, quiche, soups, and daily specials are an absolute treat every time. Served with a green and a second salad of often either couscous or potatoes, the customer always leaves full, satisfied, and keen to return. And indeed the customers here are a cross section of the immense cultural diversity that exists at Manchester, and plus the popularity amongst academic staff, this canteen is a social leveller like no-other outlet on campus.

Yet this is not just an eatery per se; it is a local joint where people come to seek comfort and friendliness, a warm welcome and a little piece of calm way from the hegemonic march of the soulless Food on Campus juggernaut. The Veggie Café has a sense of history, a unique charm that can only occur from years of dedication and quality service. Brown and her team clearly understand what it is to contribute to a successful student experience, just go and see the queues at brunch, lunch, and afternoon coffee time, this place achieves student satisfaction, and for that reason Brown is contributing to the University in her own, individual, and wonderful way.

Above: The herb garden, offering fresh bursts of flavour thyme and again.

Fuel is a bastion of veggie food and delicious beer

As a committed carnivore, Fuel Café was always going to have to work a little harder to please. I had heard vegetarian and vegan friends rave about the warm atmosphere and great food, particularly their veggie and vegan fry-ups, but I’d never made the effort to visit until I spotted the cafe when walking along Oxford Road in Withington on a drizzly and dark evening. The bright lights of Fuel drew us in, and we decided to give temporary vegetarianism a chance. It’s definitely a cosy place to spend the evening, with cushy sofas and bright murals decorating the space, and the staff are friendly if slightly lackadaisical – expect a nice chat as you order rather than super-fast service.

The food is innovative in its use of ingredients to create relatively standard dishes (burgers, wraps, salads etc.) but that have been given a twist to combine interesting flavours in new ways that don’t leave you dreaming of their meaty equivalent.

My friend’s butternut squash, feta and olive bruschetta (£6) was tasty and filling, a generous portion that satisfied while tasting healthy and fresh. Another had The Triple Decker (£5.50) which is a Fuel classic – a club sandwich combining halloumi, hummus and roasted vegetables. To be honest it was nothing hugely innovative or special, but it was tasty, the portion was generous and included chips and some interesting salads, so for the price it made a good meal. I had the dish of the day (£6), a salad of goats cheese, roasted vegetables and walnuts, served with pittas. The combination was delicious, and for once I didn’t find myself thinking that it could have been improved with the addition of bacon (something that I personally think is the case with most meals), but little things highlighted the cheap and cheerful nature of the café.

Putting hot cheese and roasted veg onto lettuce was always going to make it wilt, and eating cold cucumber and hot courgette in the same mouthful was quite odd. But it feels harsh to criticise when the overall experience was once of tasty, filling and wholesome food in warm and cosy surroundings. Another attraction for visitors, their food preferences aside, is the truly excellent range of beers available.

Fuel definitely stocks the largest selection of beers and ales for miles, you’d probably have to travel to Deaf Institute to better it, and it’s worth a visit for that alone if you fancy a relaxed evening trying out new and interesting beers.

Overall Fuel feels like a community hub, drawing people together for everything from open mike nights to quizzes to craft circles, and the food is so affordable and the welcome so genuine that you forgive some elements of amateurishness. Fuel might even win me round to the idea of a vegetarian fry-up, although at the moment I remain unconvinced that a hangover can be cured by anything other than bacon. But if anyone can change my mind, it will be them.

Atmosphere ****

Service ***

Food ***

Cornerhouse Pick of the Week: Mister John

There’s a lot on at The Cornerhouse this week, with a screening of Otto Preminger’s Laura (1944) to continue its ‘My Noir’ season, as well as the much-anticipated release of Woody Allen’s Blue Jasmine. But our Cornerhouse Pick of the Week Mister John is a definite diamond in the rough and not to be missed!

Mister John tells the tale of Irishman Gerry Devine who, struggling with his own marital difficulties, receives news of his brother’s sudden death. Grieving, he flees his own problems and flies to the home of his brother in Singapore, but his trip evolves into something much more than a flying visit as he explores Singapore and delves deeper into the life and character of his late brother in the process. Having dropped his own life in London to live in Singapore as ‘Mister John’ – his late brother’s alter-ego – Gerry has to face the inevitable question: should he stay or should he go?!

It is the latest film by husband and wife directing/editing/writing duo Joe Lawlor and Christine Molloy. Whilst they may appear to be a Jack (and Jill) of all trades, the trademark of this husband and wife combo is the sheer beauty of the films they produce. Their last film Helen (2008) won the award for Best Cinematography at the 2009 Durban International Film Festival (as well as bagging a nomination for Best Film at the 2010 Evening Standard British Film Awards) and it looks like their latest venture is going to be just as successful. Mister John wowed audiences at this year’s Edinburgh Film Festival, particularly impressing with its first class cinematography despite low-key production costs.

Understated yet classy – this should be on everyone’s watch list as an education in top-notch filmmaking. Be sure to look out for an equally brilliant performance from The Wire’s Aidan Gillen as the lead.  Calling all you aspiring filmmakers, actors and film buffs! Get yourselves to the Cornerhouse to see Mister John – it’s out Friday 27th September.

Zodiac forecasts with Mystic Moya

VIRGO (23 AUGUST – 23 SEPTEMBER)

The colour blue is a bad omen for you this week. With this in mind, while at Pangea avoid potential love interests dressed as Rafiki from The Lion King. It will only end badly.

LIBRA (24 SEPTEMBER – 23 OCTOBER)

You spend at least two hours this week scrolling through the Daily Mail online, absorbing inexplicably compelling stories about Cara Delevingne walking down the street. When your housemates ask what you’ve been doing, you will lie.

SCORPIO (24 OCTOBER – 22 NOVEMBER)

That person you were sleeping with on-and-off over summer? They won’t text you back. But don’t worry – new romantic prospects are twinkling on the horizon. There are plenty of people in Manchester you can have casual and unrewarding sex with.

SAGITTARIUS (23 NOVEMBER – 21 DECEMBER)

With Venus in ascension, you find yourself more academically minded and motivated than ever. Unfortunately, this phase will have passed by Sunday, in time for the first week of lectures.

CAPRICORN (22 DECEMBER – 20 JANUARY)

Capricorns are organised by nature, but this week you may find yourself slipping from your strict schedule a little. If people question your inadequate timekeeping, simply explain that we cannot fight our destiny. It is written in the stars.

AQUARIUS (21 JANUARY – 19 FEBRUARY)

Tension arises between you and a new friend. Dispel any storm clouds by giving them a sensual full-body massage, as Lionel Richie’s seminal 2000 album “Renaissance” plays in the background.

PISCES (20 FEBRUARY – 20 MARCH)

You meet a beguiling stranger who advises you to spend that little bit extra on bread in Sainsbury’s. You would do well to heed their warning. The 50p loaf is like eating a sponge.

ARIES (21 MARCH – 20 APRIL)

This is a good financial week for you: you find yourself in sudden possession of a large sum of money, possibly more than you’ve ever had in your bank account at one time. Now isn’t the time to play it safe: throw caution to the wind and spend it all on scratch cards. What’s the worst that could happen?

TAURUS (21 APRIL – 21 MAY)

Taureans should be extra careful with their health and safety this week. Avoid noxious gases, rabid dogs, dark alleys and ghosts.

GEMINI (22 MAY – 21 JUNE)

Sometimes, Geminis can put up walls. Let your guard down. Show friends and lovers know how much you value them by bursting into tears on nights out. Don’t let them leave the smoking area until you’ve had at least fifteen minutes of deep and meaningful conversation.

CANCER (22 JUNE – 22 JULY)

The moon is rising in Jupiter, making this a great week to indulge in your love of historical drama. Attend all your introductory lectures and meetings in costume as Henry VIII. They’ll love you for it.

LEO (23 JULY – 22 AUGUST)

You cross paths with your soulmate one night this week! Unfortunately, your low self-esteem and crippling fear of rejection will prevent you from approaching them, and you later see them getting off with someone else against a speaker.