Month: March 2011

Interview:

“If Kyuss went on any longer, I would have probably imploded”

Words by Tom Geddes

Having been part of, one of the most influential bands of the ‘90s, Kyuss, singing in scores of other bands and being involved in veterinary diagnostics, you could think John Garcia had accomplished all his goals. But as he tells Music Editor Tom Geddes, he has one last monkey on his back.

You could excuse a lack of modesty on his part when asked about his past, yet Garcia’s take on his influence lacks any element of ego. “I don’t think about it that hard. If a bottle of wine is no longer being made, there becomes a certain value to it. That’s the same with Kyuss.” Certainly, there is truth in this. When John Garcia and Josh Homme met in a bar to call the band quits, they did so not even a year after what many considered their breakthrough album, the perhaps prophetically titled …And The Circus Leaves Town. Ever since then, the mythical status of the band has snowballed, built on the back of their elusive generator party shows, in which they would take off into their hometown Palm Desert and kick up a storm in the middle of nowhere. Kyuss were always a band against the perils of fame though, and to this day Garcia maintains that it was the perfect time to call it a day. “If it went on any longer, I would have probably imploded.” Besides, Garcia points out “A lot of good things have come out of the demise of Kyuss.” Who can argue when Fu Manchu, Hermano, Mondo Generator and Queens of the Stone Age featuring ex Kyuss members?

Either way, time heals all wounds and fifteen years later, after an impromptu three-quarter reunion at French festival Hellfest, Kyuss are back, albeit under a moniker (Kyuss Lives!) and sans one very important member. “The only piece missing is Josh [Homme], who I love dearly.” Substituted in this tour for relatively unknown guitarist, Bruno Fevery, Homme has publicly been against a Kyuss reunion for many years now, so much so he wasn’t asked to be part it. “It was an expected given [that Josh wouldn’t join.] I’d have been setting myself up for immediate failure, an immediate disappointment. One of these days, hopefully I’d like to get a phone call from Josh, but I’m not holding my breath.” But there’s no hint of hard feelings: “We can have an exchange of words and then still have dinner together.”

Whilst the first Kyuss shows in fifteen years are a major talking point for many, for Garcia they are one more distraction on the road to his long awaited solo project, Garcia Vs. Garcia. “It’s not really a reunion. I’m doing this for one reason and one reason only. Garcia Vs. Garcia.” A pretty ballsy statement, but you cannot deny it of somebody who has been waiting to put out a solo record for twenty years, which as he says, “is a long time to have something nibbling at your asshole.” And despite confirming rumours that there will be another Kyuss record in the future, he defiantly states, “I’m not doing anything until I get this monkey off my back.” That even includes his day job as a vet. “I was in surgery at 3am doing C-sections on a 170lb Irish wolfhound. I love veterinary medicine, but I missed [singing.] I’d temporarily get my fix, but it was never enough.” Nothing is going to stop Garcia’s solo record and, after what’s gone before, you can’t help but anticipate an album that’s been brewing longer than Chinese Democracy.

Kyuss Lives! play Academy 1 on April 5^th

Album Review

Seun Kuti and Egypt 80

From Africa with Fury: Rise

Because Music

4 Stars

Nick Renaud-Komiya

Having a famous father and living in their shadow is never easy. Just ask Jakob Dylan or Damian Marley. This brings us onto Seun, the son of Nigerian Afrobeat pioneer and famed political activist Fela Kuti. To cap it all Seun isn’t even the only one of his illustrious pa’s offspring to become a musician. How does Kuti Jr fare? Pretty darn well, as it turns out.

From the opening moment of muscular opening track ‘African Soldier’ things are whacked up to fifth gear. It boasts horn stabs so sharp they could swipe your head clean off and sets the tone for the rest of this colourful record. By working with his dad’s old outfit, the Egypt 80, and employing the production talents of one Brian Eno, Kuti has managed to create a sound that is bolder and more adventurous than 2008’s promising Many Things.

The real weapon here is the Egypt 80, whom sound as professional and dynamic now as when they were lead by Fela.

The album’s seven songs, clocking in at a respectable 46 minutes, are a tasty collage of those ingredients that make Afrobeat so delicious; the tight rhythms, guitars set to ‘funk’ and yes, those horns. On top of these are Kuti’s astute lyrics, unloading his fury on the likes of African ‘strongmen’ and diamond mining companies. While not quite the rousing shouts for revolution that run through his dad’s ace tunes, Kuti nonetheless fills each song with a message. If ice cream vans and tannoy systems the world over played this kind of music every day, the world would be a happier place.

Title: One Way Ticket To Hell (And Unfortunately Back).

PQ: I caught the eye of Justin Hawkins and shook my head.

Tom Geddes, Music Editor

On Tuesday 15^th March, after years of speculation, pleading to the contrary and several sightings of a horseman of the apocalypse, the gates of hell opened and out from the abyss swaggered everybody’s least favourite drug casualty Justin Hawkins and his band The Darkness. For some unforeseen reason, a gap of five years is deemed appropriate enough for the decomposing corpse of society’s laughing stock to be dug out of its grave and reanimated for a second stint at life, a life which is guaranteed to be all the more annoying this time as Justin comes with an annoying moustache.

There are several things which annoy me about this story. First of all, their only announced date so far is to play Download Festival, which I’ll be at, leaving me with the horrible reality that I’ll have to go and see them. Yes, there are 4 other stages. Yes, there will be better bands on the other stages. But, the flip side of this is that I also like to boo given half an opportunity and, as a human, I have a morbid curiosity for disastrous events; the type you usually put into use when driving past a car crash.

Another thing that annoys me about this monstrosity reforming is that I feel sorry for Dan Hawkins who has to put up with his brother and all the shit that comes with him. Five years might heal many wounds, even those that come from your own flesh and blood being so useless at taking coke that he tears apart the world famous band you’re in. But, if I were Dan Hawkins, I’m not sure I’d be so willing to crawl back to him when his new band isn’t doing as well as my own. Whilst Dan was eking out a reasonable living with the small but at least relatively respected Stone Gods, Justin was attacking ears everywhere with his own Darkness rip off, Hot Leg. I’ve seen them both in support slots and the latter provoked a reaction I’ve never seen at a gig before. Silence. Pure silence. I actually caught the eye of Justin Hawkins as he walked off stage and shook my head. I like to think he sat in his dressing room that night and cried.

Whilst I cannot deny that I chuckled the first time I heard their Christmas single and that Permission to Land put rock on the map for a short time, it was always rock aimed at people who didn’t really like rock; a parody that somehow got taken more seriously than it deserved. The second album flopped when people realised the parody was awful, so what’s to say the third won’t do even worse. Reunions worked for bands that meant something in their day, like Rage Against the Machine, but not The Darkness surely. People say that enough time has passed to forgive them and let them have their second chance, but long enough doesn’t exist. After all, you wouldn’t resurrect Hitler in 500 years.

On that fateful night I realised that although none may replace, truly replace her as the ultimate post-pub cuisine, there are times where she cannot be there for you, thus I have compiled a list of alternatives for all those lonesome nights.

Toast
Bread taken to the next level by grilling it. Round after round of the stuff, lathering it with butter, marmite, jam or whatever, forgetting about what you’ll need for breakfast the next morning and demolishing the entire loaf; then becoming every one’s favourite person by burning a batch and setting off the fire alarm.

Lettuce/Spinach/Bean Sprouts
Crunchy greens can be eaten pretty much non stop with very little consequence. They are healthy and relatively inexpensive, they are however also probably the most boring things to eat ever.

Frozen Pizza
This could be as satisfying as a takeaway, if cooking one always ended in success. And yet success is rarely the case, as once you’ve managed to turn on the oven you may make the fatal error of deciding to leave the kitchen while you wait the 20-30 minutes it takes to cook. The most probable result of this is you rushing to the kitchen screaming expletives and then coughing and wheezing whilst you remove the smoldering heap of charcoal that was once a Goodfella’s meat feast from the oven.

Cheese
There is nothing more satisfying than grabbing an entire block of Seriously Strong Extra Mature Cheddar and chomping straight into it. Then again, there is nothing more disappointing than trying to make a sandwich for lunch a few days later with one measly piece of cheese covered in teeth marks.

Cereal
Play it safe with Tony the Tiger, the Nesquik Bunny and Bran Flakes. Cereal is a smart solution as it is quick and filling. Trouble can occur though if you aren’t assertive with your choice of milk and start an inadvertent milk war by accidentally picking up some one else’s for pouring over your cheerio mountain.

Biscuits
Biscuits are delicious, in fact they are too delicious as the whole packet will have to be devoured. Unfortunately, once sober, you will have forgotten all about your crumby feast and thus when you next go to your cupboard expecting to find a nice custard cream or two to dunk in your tea, you will instead find emptiness and despair with only yourself to blame

Leftover Dinner
When you cook dinner before you go out, make more than you actually plan on eating, and then leave your less sober self some delicious leftovers. Then when your alter-ego comes stumbling in the early hours they will find the leftovers and hopefully finish them up. Be wary of the ferocious appetite of the drunken mind, one bowl of spag bog may not be enough and thus further raiding of cupboards may occur.

Nothing
Holy Moses, to go to bed without eating anything after a night of drinking high calorie alcoholic beverages is almost unthinkable. It is however, the choice that you will regret least in the morning. The worst part about eating food when you are inebriated is the fact that you may not recall how much you enjoyed it – if you could have even enjoyed it all. It’s a tough call to make, but when you wake up without the taste of raw doner in your mouth and instead with the knowledge that you can go to your kitchen and eat some of the food that you had not decided to devour the night before, you will be a happier person. Or so I have been told.

By Jemma Gibson

Ingredients

• 110g unsalted butter (cut into small pieces and warmed slightly)
• 180g sugar (caster or granulated white is best)
• 2 eggs
• 125g self-raising flour
• 120g plain flour
• 125ml semi-skimmed milk
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 5 tablespoons raspberry jam (seedless unless you want seeded cakes)
• Icing sugar for dusting tops

Method
Preheat oven to 160°C/350°F/gas mark 4
Cream (using whisk or electric whisk) the butter and sugar for at least 4 minutes-until smooth and creamy, add the eggs on at a time, mixing after each.
Mix both of the flours in a separate bowl. Add the vanilla extract to the milk in a jug. Add one third of the flour mix to the creamed mixture and beat well, and then add a third of the milk and beat well, repeat flour/milk steps until all of the flour and milk is added. Ensure it’s all well mixed. Add the jam but barely stir (it’ll get a lot more mixed in when you spoon the mixture into the cases and the idea is for the cakes to have pink streaks running through them)
Spoon the mixture into cupcake cases so each is about two thirds full. Bake for about 25 minutes or until raised and golden brown (try to avoid opening the oven door while they bake). Remove from the oven, leave to cool slightly and then transfer to a wire cooling rack (or clean grill pan) to cool.

By Lloyd Henning, Food and Drink editor

They came from far and wide; the brave and the bold, the hungry and the famished. All to compete in what was is now infamous Mancunion Cake-off. As part of student media week the paper organised the event on Wednesday 2nd March in the union bar. It was to be contest of intense cake talent. Every last competitor was viciously compete, no one wanted to lose, every one wanted to win – to be crowned cake champion of the union.

The initial preview of the cakes garnered a lot of attention from other patrons of the bar, all gazing at the doughy creations in awe. Still, no one was able to have a guess at who would come out on top. Amongst the Godzillas and Gadaffis , there was an amazing entry by a one Sam Bernard, a multi-layered monster church cake.

And so the judging began, there were three categories that each cake was meticulously inspected on: taste, aesthetics and extravagance. Taste was rated from vulgar through to exquisite; for aesthetics there were the hideous, the inoffensive and the objects of pure sex; and for extravagance there were the mundane, the individuals and the magnificent.

The judges tasted, they observed, they pondered, and worked their way through cake after cake getting closer and closer to finding the one that would be crowned champion and who would be immortalised in the Mancunion Cake-off hall of fame.

In the end it came down to three, Sophie Donovan’s ‘Currant affairs’ Gadaffi cake, Emily Oliver’s banana cupcakes and Catherine Sargent cupcake flowers. The room was full with sweat and nerves as the true victor was announced. So it transpired that the first legend of the Mancunion Cake off was Emily Oliver, her cupcakes had swooned the judges with their moist texture and creamy frosting.

However we shall never forget those brave men and women who entered the cake-off and made it the brain-melting awesome event that it was. Thanks to every one who came, even those who may have not won, your spirit will live on, with the hundreds and thousands in heaven above.

By Emily Clark
I am a bit of a sushi fanatic. I have taken it upon myself to probe the sushi world of Manchester and can safely say that the days of eating Tesco’s suspicious interpretation of Japanese food are far behind me. However, my overenthusiastic sushi exhaltations often seem to get the same response: one of genuine interest overshadowed by the veil of raw fish anxiety. Fear not. The idea of simply eating slabs of raw fish makes me feel somewhat uneasy – thus I hasten to stress that this is not what sushi is all about.
Sushi Facts
For anyone who has not as yet ventured down this culinary path, here is the lowdown on the basics of sushi.
Firstly, sushi actually just refers to the type of rice. The seaweed used to bundle up the rice is called nori and the combination of the two to make a roll is called makizushi. Anything can be used as a filling – avocado, asparagus, tuna, salmon, crabsticks, duck; basically anything that can be chopped up to make a stick shape. Nigirizushi is when a block of sushi rice has a topping placed on it rather than in the middle. Hand rolls, called temaki, look a bit like ice cream cones, except that the cone is made of nori and is packed with rice and other pleasant things. Sashimi is the name for the slabs of raw fish, which if fresh can be beautiful.
The only other information I feel necessary to impart is the use of wasabi and pickled ginger. Wasabi is effectively Japanese horseradish, but don’t let this conjure up bad associations of eating overcooked slices of beef with your grandparents, as wasabi is much sexier. The sushi eater is given a dish for soy sauce and can then mix in the desired amount of wasabi. The idea is to start off with a tiny amount, and please learn from the mistakes of many naïve but adventurous beginners who have been robbed of their wasabi eating potential by trying it by itself. Pickled ginger is used to cleanse the pallet in between dishes.
Places to Go
Though very accessible, my issue with recommending Yo Sushi for first-timers is that they painfully anglicise the Japanese delicacy. However, in a twisted way, the patronising staff and garish decor make it an excellent place to begin. I would not have been so gently eased into the sushi world without Yo Sushi. They also employ a 25% student discount if you print off a voucher from their website. However, I maintain that any establishment offering turkey and cranberry sushi at Christmas should be forcibly shut down and the proprietors charged with community service.
For anyone who wants a slightly less English experience, most sushi restaurants in Chinatown offer a more adventurous but authentic menu. One recommendation I have is Tokyo Season, near Piccadilly Gardens, where I once ate octopus, arctic clam, squid and eel amongst some other unfamiliar things – all on a massive hangover. Everything was at least mildly enjoyable; I kept it all down and remain very proud of myself. Umami on Oxford Road and Little Samsi in Withington both offer non-patronising and fresh sushi – the latter very reasonably.
My final piece of advice is to try grilled eel sushi, as it is by far the most delicious discovery of my experimental enterprises. Now go and lose your sushi virginity, if you haven’t already done so. Because, if nothing else, the novelty of having your food presented to you on a conveyor belt will never get tiring.

Couscous
Lloyd Henning
The food so good they named it twice. Couscous is the lazy man’s rice/pasta/porridge/kebab. With minimum effort you can create a warm pile of carbohydrate fulfillment in minutes. The process of couscous cooking is as simple putting the kettle on boil, then pouring the hot water over some dry couscous in bowl. It’s like pasta cereal.

To sex up your couscous, add anything you can find, a bit of soy sauce, a pinch of cumin. Rice and pasta have had their day, they were too sure of themselves: their arrogance shining through as the took an age to cook and then still sticking to the pan. Couscous has risen out of obscurity to be the new champion of the starch kingdom. It used to be only for the hippies and vegans, but now thanks to the miracle of mass production and supermarkets, you too can wield its power. So join the liberation and rush now to Sainsbury’s, to Tesco’s, to that corner shop near where you live and demand couscous, for it will change your world.

Mayonnaise
James Watts
When my finances are looking bleak, there’s one thing I’ll always continue to buy (as well as alcohol): mayonnaise. Hellmann’s or Sainsbury’s, full fat or low fat, a jar or a squeezy bottle, it’s all the same to me: glorious mayonnaise.

This cracking condiment is the perfect addition to practically any food; burgers, sandwiches, chips, pizza – even a roast dinner is improved. If what you’re eating is that little bit too hot, dip it in the cool, creamy and refreshing mayonnaise: you’ll experience a incredible food sensation that also won’t burn the roof of your mouth. When life is really tough, and there’s no light at the end of the tunnel, do not fear – there is a solution: get the mayo out, and just eat it on its own. And for that moment, everything is wonderful: all your worries just float away. It’s that good.

So, the next time you’re eating a meal – be it a 3am drunken snack or a romantic dinner date with your other half – don’t forget the white stuff. It’s just too good.

Wagamama Teryaki glaze
Catherine May
Sometimes I get annoyed at how much I love Wagamama’s Teryaki Salmon. Firstly, because
it’s so good that it means I’ve never tried anything else on their menu. And secondly, because it’s one of the most expensive things they sell. But now, without wanting to sound too much like a Brand Power advert, I can create it inexpensively at home with a jar of Wagamama Teryaki glaze.

Available in all good-sized retailers (read as: Tesco Metro opposite the Arndale) one jar contains more than enough for four portions of any sort of stir fry. Combining it with noodles, pak choi and salmon helps me feel as though I am sat on a long bench centimetres away from a stranger a la my normal Wagamama experience but there’s no need to stick to their suggestions.

With sustainable fish all the range, I like to marinate sea trout fillets in it before baking or frying. Teryaki beef is a dish that costs two pounds more to experience in the Japanese dining establishment so I’ve never braved it, but a homemade version definitely ups the ante. To be honest, this glaze works with any stir fry; even the humble vegetarian stir fry can be brightened up to please my carnivorous self when I pour in some of this tar-like substance.
Whatever you do, don’t let supermarket own brands tempt you. After mistakenly opting for Coops thinner, cheaper offering I noted my error and thoroughly regret ever straying from the sweet smell of a Wagamama Teryaki stir fry.

Pesto
Jemma Gibson

Pesto, staple of Italian cooking, staple of my cupboard. I’ve not found anything with the ability to transform mundane, student-esque dishes in the way that this tasty, herby, and cheap as chips sauce will. Spreading it on bread in the place of butter in sandwiches will create a quick lunchtime masterpiece (in particular if toasted-or taken into uni to rub in the faces of the unfortunate students living on soup from the JRUL cafe). Better still, stir into a bowl of plain pasta (or tortellini if you’re posh) to create a dish Antonio Carluccio himself would be proud of – I know because he made it on Saturday Kitchen the other day.

Possibly even better than the endorsement of a top Italian chef – although it should be noted Carluccio didn’t get his pesto from a jar – is the price tag on a jar of the stuff, easily available at less than a pound from most supermarkets-definitely Lidl and the wide range; green (basil), red (sun-dried tomato or pepper), or purple (aubergine) means that unlike the generic ketchup or mayo or barbecue, this is a sauce that will take a while to tire of, plus, unlike the aforementioned sauces, it’ll impress your mum.

Onions
Issac Cameron

I think onions are the best, the unsung heroes of the culinary world. Ranging from the bog standard flavour filled brown to the delicately flavoured and crunchy spring onion they can add flavour to pretty much any meal, but are never really appreciated in their own right.

What would a risotto be without the base flavour given by slowly sweating brown onions or shallots first? And doesn’t gravy taste so much better when its combined with a few onions?

The beauty of onions is that they are so versatile. When eaten raw, a red onion adds zing and crunchy texture, but when they are cooked slowly for a long time, leeks, red and brown onions create a deep savoury flavour which cannot be imitated by any other ingredient.

One problem with the onion is that it doesn’t often enough take centre stage, but there are a couple of my favourite dishes in which the onion takes the leading role. The first is the classic French onion soup. Very easy and very tasty, the dish relies wholly on the flavour packed in by the abundance of onions used. The second is a red onion, tomato and herb salad. If you macerate the onions in lemon juice and salt for about thirty minutes before adding them it takes away some of the bite and also turns them a nice pink colour.

Next time you’re planning your meals for the week, spare a little thought for the onion. The tasty workhorse of the food world.

Aromat
Emily Clark

My favourite store cupboard ingredient by far is Aromat – the legendary ‘All Purpose Savoury Seasoning’ from Knorr. Available in Sainsbury’s in the herby section for just 79 pence, this kitchen delight is an essential for anything I make involving pasta. Aromat is effectively a replacement for salt, hence its main ingredient after salt is monosodium glutamate (MSG). Don’t listen to the MSG cynics, Aromat is perfectly healthy in moderation and good for the soul.
How to make something with this amazing ingredient? Simply cook some pasta, then add butter and Aromat to taste. Nothing pretentious, this is pure comfort food. I also use it in spaghetti bolognese, chili con carne and pasta bakes. By no means is Aromat restricted to pasta dishes, the container suggests use with vegetables, rice, salads and even as a meat rub. Why not? My love for Aromat means that as well as keeping a pot in my kitchen cupboard, I now have one in my bedroom fruit bowl, ironically enough. How can anything that is this bright yellow not be an excellent addition to one’s food?

Lentils
Alex Wardall
I couldn’t live without lentils. I was going to to lie and go with the safer option of pesto, but the sad truth is lentils are the ingredient I couldn’t live without,and here’s why:

They are incredibly good value, one bag lasts me at least a month and, like rice, they are a great carrier of spices and sauces. Baked chicken or fish are great on lentils as an alternative to mash. Soups, Stews, Curries; the lentil isn’t fussy, it loves them all.

Lentils, in my completely non-technical food groups, are what I would call ‘a Bulker’. I find good-quality meat and fish too expensive to be buying in large amounts. Enter lentils. They are excellent as a substitute, or for the dedicated carnivores, just to ‘bulk up’ a normally meat-only meal. Next time you make a chicken curry or beef stew go half meat, half lentils. Delicious, cheaper and just as filling.

I feel sorry for lentils, I really do. For somewhere along the line they were relegated to the ‘uncool’ pile of food goods, condemned to a life in Vegan cafés surrounded by equally defeated ingredients such as quinoa and tofu. If the saying goes that real men don’t eat quiche, they certainly don’t eat lentils. I’m guessing that the majority of people picture the lentil-eating customer as similar to the mother from About a Boy in all her orange yeti-sweater and Jesus-sandal glory. I am no vegetarian, and I certainly don’t wear sandals. But I do love a good lentil.