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Month: April 2016

UMWHC Season Review

The University of Manchester Women’s Hockey Club (UMWHC) is the largest women’s only sports club, with five squads competing in Wednesday BUCS leagues against other universities, and a further four teams competing in a weekend league against local Manchester teams. The teams span a wide range of abilities and have all experienced success in their leagues this year. UMWHC is run by a committee of 15 second and third year students from all teams, with the aim of organising and developing the club for current and future members.

UMWHC is a competitive club, always striving to put the best team performance possible out on the pitch; the results this season have proved this. The most notable performance came from the fifth team, winning eight out of the nine BUCS matches played, finishing with a great goal difference of 32 to secure promotion. In contrast, the first team had a difficult season, facing opposition such as Loughborough and Birmingham University second teams. They fought well but faced relegation by the end of the season. The other three teams displayed some strong performances, which allowed them to finish mid-table and retain their positions in their respective leagues for next season.

In addition to the BUCS matches, all the girls spend some of their time on the weekends playing local Manchester teams in weekend leagues. Following a big restructure this year of the teams UMWHC put out, the second, third, and fourth teams ended up competing against teams that were one, or even two, leagues above their previous positions. The girls took this as a challenge, and instead of being demoralised when the usual winning streak was not replicated, they used the improved competition from the opposition to hone their skills and improve team chemistry. This translated to stronger performances against other universities to help secure the many successes and rack up the BUCS points.

After the hard work put in by all of the girls at Wednesday BUCS matches, there is always a greatly attended weekly social on a Wednesday night. All the teams come together to share celebrations, or on occasion, commiserations, for the earlier results with other members of the club. This ensures great friendships are made across all five of the teams, contributing to the great sense of community and togetherness. Being a large club, there are many traditions that have been established over the years, such as the games played at the socials and enjoying a cider black or two at Squirrels Bar. Throughout the year there have been a wide variety of social events put on in addition to weekly AU nights. Particularly unforgettable nights include the Christmas ball and the pub quiz.

As a club, 54 of the girls are running in the Great Manchester 10K run, the largest single society turn out of all AU clubs. We are fundraising for the EY foundation to raise money to help young people, particularly those from disadvantaged backgrounds, find alternative routes to employment, education or even to help them set up their own businesses. It is a fantastic charity and the first time UMWHC has been fundraising for them. So many girls taking part shows the importance of the club to its members; they are willing to put in extra work and commitment out of season to help the club in its fundraising efforts. Overall, it has been a fantastic year for UMWHC, and I have enjoyed being a part of it.

If you are interested in playing hockey for university contact us via Facebook. Trials for next season will take place at the beginning of the new academic year.

Victoria Wood: The “humble genius”

2016 has already taken its handful of greats; Alan Rickman, David Bowie and Ronnie Corbett to name but a few. And yesterday Death chose to take a true Northern great: Victoria Wood.

Wood, a master of her craft, grew up in Prestwich, Greater Manchester, the youngest of four children. After studying drama at the University of Birmingham she won the ITV talent show New Faces which saw her land her first regular role as a novelty act on the BBC’s consumer affairs programme That’s Life! in 1976.

Wood’s cocktail of fierce determination and outstanding versatility successfully saw her secure a place as one of Britain’s most popular standup comics. Her longtime collaborator Julie Walters, who she first met at Manchester Polytechnic’s student theatre aged 17 would prove to be a lifelong friend. When asked for comment regarding today’s loss Walters stated she was, “too heartsore to comment—the loss of her is incalculable”. Their shows laced through the 1980s included Victoria Wood As Seen On TV and Wood and Walters, which showcased her knack of social observation and sharply witty songwriting.

Wood had said in previous interviews that she stood by the “life-affirming” value of comedy. Her work spanning over four decades also spanned across the various arenas of entertainment—of which she triumphed in all. Arguably her most famous was Dinnerladies which as well as writing and starring in  for two years also brought now-heavyweights such as Maxine Peake to our screens.

As well as this, Wood wrote in abundance for theatre. 2005 saw her pen a musical, Acorn Antiques, which was based upon the long-running feature of her sketch show. She also wrote The Day We Sang which stemmed from famous recordings of Purcell’s Nymphs and Shepherds made by Manchester Children’s Choir. The play debuted at the Manchester International Festival in 2011 and this was to be her final piece of work.

Four decades of work didn’t come without its rewards. To list a few; in 1997 she was appointed Officer of the Order of the British Empire (OBE), she was also appointed Commander of the Order of the British Empire (CBE) in the 2008 Birthday Honours. In 2003 she was listed in The Observer as one of the 50 Funniest Acts in British Comedy, as well as this in 2005 Channel 4’s poll of the Comedians’ Comedian spotlighted her as the highest-ranked woman of the list, beating names such as French & Saunders and Joyce Grenfell.

Her work also won her five BAFTAs from 14 nominations—the highest amount of nominations bestowed upon and won by an individual. Her records also include the highest amount of television BAFTAs ever won in history as well as holding the record for fifteen consecutive sold out shows at the Royal Albert Hall.

Today is not just a sad day for British comedy but British culture. Her appetite for regional, relatable comedy held no bounds. “Life’s not fair, is it? Some of us drink champagne in the fast lane and some of us eat our sandwiches by the loose chippings on the A597.’’ Today, it certainly wasn’t fair.

TEDxUniversityofManchester – Infinite Possibilities

TEDx came once again to the University of Manchester on Saturday 16th April, with the theme of ‘Infinite Possibilities’.

TED was founded in 1984 and has since provided “short, powerful” talks to educate, inspire and engage its global array of viewers. TEDx events are independent, “community-driven” conferences set up by locals for locals, that use the same principles as the main TED organisation.

Saturday’s ‘Infinite Possibilities’ was set up by two final year students, Emrana Khatun and Liz Tiong Li Chen, who chose the mysterious and vague theme on purpose. They said that they picked this title as they liked its “very ambiguous nature”, as it could “signify hope and highlight the potential that lies within each and every one of us.”

The conference took place in the busy Rise space on Deansgate, an events area provided by Barclays and paired with the Grindsmith café. On entering, I thought that I had walked into a kitsch coffee shop—flat whites and beanie hats abound, set against open brickwork, steel arches and spotlights. Rounding the corner, the industrial-style auditorium opened up, seating 100 people; with this including the speakers themselves, tickets sold out extremely quickly—some people reported that they were gone in four seconds.

However, the relatively small crowd allowed for a much more intimate and friendly mood than I had been expecting. The atmosphere was alive with chirpy conversations and excitement about what was to come over the course of the day.

An Arts Management Master’s degree student said that she was hoping to gain “a lot of inspiration and creative ideas” to use in her studies from the day. Another attendee, Urban Planning undergraduate Felix, told The Mancunion that he was trying to follow his dreams and “get inspired.” Clearly, everyone in the audience had high hopes.

After some technical difficulties causing a slow start, Shiv Tulsiani, the TEDx host for the day, stepped onto the stage to welcome us. Straight away, it was apparent that the informality and friendliness would extend to the speakers as well as the crowd—jokes were frequent and applause was plentiful.

The first guest of the day was dancer David Kam, from the Natalie Su company in London. He began with a brief talk about his homeland of Malaysia, describing the multicultural nature of Kuala Lumpur. He spoke of how the city itself has developed its own ‘Lingua Franca’, a mixture of Malay, English and Tamil, to enable people of different cultures to communicate with each other.

Kam described his goal and that of the Natalie Su company as an artistic equivalent. Their aim was to incorporate multiple creative disciplines into one performance, to create an interactive and experimental display. He, along with illustrator Joanna Layla, violinist Henry Webster, projection designer Graham Robinson and choreographer Natalie Su Robinson, worked together to improvise a live performance on stage for the TEDx audience.

The result was like no other exhibition or performance I’ve ever seen. Initially, there were so many things going on simultaneously, I was not sure where to look. However, as I started to understand the concept behind it and the artists became more in sync with each other, the point became clear and the work more compelling. It was less a performance and more an experiment.

The applause was heavy and the wide grins on all of the artists’ faces were enough to convince me that they had thoroughly enjoyed it. Later in the day, I caught up with David and Joanna to discuss how they came up with the idea.

David stated that he refused to think of the display as a performance, but instead as an “experimental process in action”. They did not rehearse beforehand, to make sure that they were all improvising entirely, forcing them to be completely absorbed in the immediate situation; Kam repeatedly emphasised this, adding “the more immersed you are in a moment, the more authentic the output is.”

He went on to say that the mixture of modes allows a “sense of investment and respect” to be shared between all of the contributors, even though, perhaps oddly to outsiders, they “don’t talk about the fact that we [they] work in different mediums.” When asked finally what he wanted the audience to gain from the group’s presentation, Kam thought for a moment before saying “to have a direct conversation with the performers themselves”, using the “speaking pencil, drawing violin and listening body.”

The second speaker of the day was 18-year-old Hassan Iqbal, a finalist in the Young Entrepreneur of the Year awards and CEO of Creative Pixels, his own creative media agency. Hassan gave a talk on being successful in business and the questions to ask yourself to get your dream job.

Iqbal advised the audience to “be unique and do something that you enjoy, even if it’s out of the norm.” He described some of his contemporaries entering the 9 – 5 world doing jobs that they do not enjoy because “society thinks they should.” He followed this with a heartfelt plea to not “do things for the wrong reasons”, but to “take every opportunity, even if it’s small… to change your life.”

Richard Ramachandran was the next guest, a Scottish man who could be unusually described as part-filmmaker, part-scientist. An Illustration and Animation graduate, he has helped to create a new genre of film—that is, mind-controlled movies.

These films require the watcher to wear a piece of equipment that looks much like a large Bluetooth headset, which monitors the wearer’s brain’s electrical activity to control the outcome of the movie. Ramachandran had to create four distinct but interchangeable layers of film and scores that the headset can cut between to create a personalised movie for each watcher. As he spoke, he showed us clips from the different film layers he had made and demonstrated how they swapped unnoticeably between each other.

Richard left his audience in awe as he finished with the question that he will be basing his upcoming doctorate on—“Can we make a film that is unique to one person and will they like it more than one that someone else made?”

Fourth on stage was bubbly American Jennifer Arcuri, whose quick jokes and fast pace made her a firm crowd favourite. Her subject was computer hacking and how it is very difficult, especially for young people and children, to know where the ethical boundaries lie online. As somewhat of a technophobe, I was not expecting to understand, let alone enjoy her talk, but it turned out to be relatable and interesting to even me.

After introducing the topic, she turned to the audience and said bluntly: “There’s something here we need to talk about… It’s too easy to be illegal.” She followed this with ideas for how to solve the problem, from new legislation to workshops for young people. Arcuri is a co-founder of Hacker House, a company based in London that aims to tackle these issues, as well as to provide cyber security services for companies.

Steve Rawling was up next, a man known in the media industry as the ‘Infinite Storyteller’, with over 25 years of experience across a variety of roles in the field. He provided storytelling and presentation tips and tricks, stating frankly to bear in mind that “it’s not about you… telling other people’s stories is the way to become an infinite storyteller.”

Ash Dykes followed, the 25-year-old Welsh explorer who in 2014 became the first person to traverse Mongolia on foot, solo and unsupported. He spoke of his many journeys, both leading up to the trek and the 78-day expedition itself and the challenges he has faced along the way. His inspirational speech included advice for any would-be adventurers—“You must mentally believe that you can do it before you physically put your body through it.”

Solicitor and consultant Will Baker later spoke on prisons and immigration detention centres and the necessity for the public to “hold a mirror to power”, to ensure that conditions are kept fair and safe. He described the groups of volunteers that visit these centres and accompany the asylum seekers if they are deported, stating that they must ask “is this fair? Is this reasonable? Is this decent?” He highlighted that deportation cannot be avoided, so it “must be done in the fairest way possible.”

Baker praised the British authorities in their ability to “deescalate problems… with as little physical force as possible”, but still emphasised the importance of the public increasing their involvement with official processes, to prevent key organisations from gaining too much power.

The penultimate speaker was Marcus East, a technology director who prefaced his lecture by declaring “this is not supposed to be inspirational… this is a warning.” This attention-grabbing statement was startling after a day fairly full of positivity and inspiration, causing the audience to sit up and focus perhaps more even than previously.

He went on to discuss the rapid pace of technological advance and how there is a hidden side of it, of “dark tech” that could potentially be used to control people in the near future. He warned of the “civil unrest suppression” robots currently undergoing construction in Silicon Valley, as well as the armed drones that are being tested every day in the USA. East finished his speech by reminding the audience of the first of Isaac Asimov’s famous 1942 Laws of Robotics: “A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.”

The final guest of the day was digital artist Sumit Sakar, who worked with a whole range of mediums before moving onto software and 3D printing. He showed many examples of his previous multi-modal work, much of it based on Hindu mythology and “comic iconography”.

After showing these pieces, Sakar informed us that he would be making live digital 3D sculpture then and there on his tablet. The screen was initially filled with a pixelated ball, but within 10 minutes of stylus tapping and trance music had become a screaming demon clawing its way out of a box. The transformation was astonishing and it was a fantastic way to finish the day.

Closing the conference, Tulsiani and the event organisers Khatun and Chen came back onto the stage to present gifts to the speakers. We were reminded that 12 years ago, neither Air BnB, nor Facebook, nor Uber existed, but are today worth a combined £250 billion—a real-life illustration that possibilities truly are infinite.

Project Parent: the inevitable embarrassment of graduation day

There are only two camps who are exempt from being embarrassed by their parents. There’s those who are best buddies with their exceptionally cool parents and all their friends can ring up your mum Jocelyn anytime they like, and there’s those who are so chilled and laid back that they see no reason to be embarrassed.

Sure, your mum may have turned up looking like she’s Princess Eugene at Ascot and your dad hasn’t worked out how to put his phone on silent so his BBC News notifications won’t stop going off, but why should that bother you? You’re your own person.

For the rest of us, graduation is potentially going to be a bumpy ride. Never before has there been such a minefield for disaster. Nicknames that you casually chuck about at uni are going to have to be thoroughly vetted, lest you have to explain in detail why your friend Mike is being called ‘Juiceifer’ and no, he doesn’t work at a smoothie place.

Similarly, now might be the time to warn your friends that Mum and Dad are not going to ‘lol’ at that hilarious story where you vomited into your bag and fell asleep on your friend’s doorstep. Nor the one where you did 48 hours of work straight because you’d left it until the last minute and then had an unfortunate incident with some energy drinks. Definitely not the one where you took home ‘Rick’, sang him ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’ and realised the next morning that his name was Nick. NO. None of these.

Talk about that great day trip to the Lowry Museum, the hilarious time that Sarah accidentally burnt the sausages one Sunday morning and other equally tame situations. Once you’ve set the ground rules for conversation between parents and friends, now all you have to worry about is your mum potentially sobbing through the ceremony or shouting when you go up.

If you’ve got older siblings or your dad went to uni himself, he will most likely spend the majority of the day comparing prior graduation ceremonies and admiring the architecture. Seemingly harmless, until the whole family realises that your older brother Tim is now going to need therapy after the three hour period of your Dad indirectly telling him his 2:2 degree in Economics from Bangor University is worth shit if we’re basing it on graduation ceremonies.

Generally though, just treat it as what it is—a highly embarrassing day to celebrate you scraping that degree, with you getting to wear a floor length black cape and a cap.

Enjoy.

The taxing demands of being a leader

Prime Minister Cameron and his taxes: a simple situation turned into the angry mob scene in Frankenstein. Movie, not book. Among the crowd is The Guardian, which resorted to conspiracy theories based on the name of Ian Cameron’s offshore firm, Blairmore Holdings, in effort to justify cries for resignation. Critics are rabble rousing to make Cameron seem guiltier than he is. Which is to say, not at all. The left-leaning publication also spun facts to make it seem as though he never paid tax on his profits from said corporation. He did, as did the rest of the family. According to the leaks, he has paid more tax than necessary by refraining from the tax-exempt £20,000 allowance that PMs receive to cover the expenses of holding office.

Often used by those who find the Prime Minister “dodgy”, tax dodging is substituted for the official term, tax avoidance. Besides for “dodging” being the derogatory sibling to the more neutral “avoidance”, the definitions are almost identical. They both mean to step away from something, the former additionally having the condition of doing it suddenly and quickly. Because of its unofficial status, I shall place tax dodging between tax avoidance and tax evasion on the scale of legality. Where tax avoidance is legal, tax dodging is frowned upon, and tax evasion is illegal.

Common ways to save money include: taking advantage of your personal pension scheme, donating to charity through gift aid, or claiming capital allowance for entrepreneurial reasons. The government encourages people to have Individual Savings Accounts (ISA) where after-tax incomes are exempt from income tax and capital gains tax on investment returns. Consulting with a qualified accountant on financial planning is advised, as you might be paying more than legally required. Because tax palliations can very easily become unknowingly abused, speaking with a tax lawyer if engaging in isolated practices to ensure legality would also be wise. Mr. Cameron’s mother, after speaking with her friendly neighborhood financial advisor, gifted the PM an additional £200,000 after his initial inheritance of £300,000 from the death of his father. Separate apportionments were made to avoid breaching tax thresholds, which would have resulted in paying inheritance tax. If she passes away before 2018 however, the “seven year rule” will dictate that her estate (liable to inheritance tax) will include earlier gifts to children. This is so that parents don’t quickly transfer assets to their children before dying to avoid tax responsibilities. Note that Cameron’s gifts had already been subject to tax, double taxation being the result if the mother had not arranged the assets accordingly.

For most people, lower taxes are preferred. One reason being that they don’t completely agree with most of the spending allocations the government uses revenue for. The deviated group that prefers high taxes calls tax avoidance immoral. There’s no arguing with people’s values, but I would hope that they respect others wanting to keep more of their income. HMRC defines it clearly: “Tax avoidance is bending the rules of the tax system to gain a tax advantage that Parliament never intended”.

As previously mentioned, avoidance can easily become dodging by using practices solely for a tax advantage rather than to produce capital. Artificial transactions for the sake of not paying taxes are widely criticized by supporters and critics of tax avoidance. Where avoidance still works with the spirit of the law, dodging only technically follows it. Whether or not dodging is deliberate, whereby falling under tax evasion, varies from place to place and should be consulted with a professional. This information is not hidden from the general public. Advice is everywhere, even from politicians. George Osborne helped a caller avoid paying tax using “clever financial products” in 2003.

It wasn’t about Cameron’s taxes, people are angry at his wealth. He didn’t cheat or do anything remotely illegal, but he did inherit a large sum from his father. But the country already knew his background when they elected and re-elected him (with an overall majority). Still, it’s understandable for minimum wage workers to be frustrated. Mr. Cameron knows his outsider status, people don’t let him forget it, and so he’s responded by revealing a private part of his life. Cameron did something analogous in 2010 when he sold his stake of Blairmore Holdings for £30,000, the same year he became Prime Minister. Again, he was under no obligation. But he knew that it wouldn’t help his public image, and thus a deed unmentioned. And to clarify, the Camerons paid British taxes on their income from the trust. Therefore his involvement in the Panama Papers is simply tax avoidance.

Taxes are a private matter, yet MPs are now calling for tax returns from fellow members due to public interest. Instead of a public shaming, investigative duties could be given to a parliamentary committee so that the affairs of politicians are expertly scrutinized for dishonest behavior. Stigmatizing legal tax practices and an inflated sense of social justice stemming from the idea of working the most leading to being paid the most contributes to the downfall of innovation. Speaking from his defense and in general, we expect too much from MPs. David Cameron wasn’t born with extra, otherworldly qualities that made him naturally fit to run a country. Building up leaders to impossible standards allows us to not have to think for ourselves. Energy spent immortalizing our leaders, would be better served strengthening institutions—those are the ones that last.

The Junction that is the Old Trafford job

Manchester United have pulled up at a crossroads. Like any normal crossroads, there are three options: left, Ryan Giggs; right, Jose Mourinho and straight on, continuing Louis Van Gaal’s reign. In the past four months, as results have dropped off in the league and in Europe, separate rumours have confirmed all three individuals as conclusive managers of United next season. With the fans and generally bemused public all waiting for the soap opera to finalise, I have decided to investigate the pros and cons of each suitor.

Giggs pros:

There isn’t a man who embodies Manchester United more than Ryan Giggs. Having played for the club for 23 years, racking up 963 appearances (a club record), winning 13 league titles, 4 FA cups, and 2 Champions League trophies amongst other honours, the Welshman is the most decorated player in British football history and a loyal servant. For this, Giggs has forever won the hearts of United fans all over the world. When Moyes failed in his one and only season at the club, the Welsh wizard took over as interim manager of the club for four matches. In those games, Giggs demonstrated that he wanted to project the ‘United way’ onto the players, playing free-flowing attacking football, and when defeated by Sunderland, Giggs relied on youth, giving James Wilson and Tom Lawrence debuts, in which the former scored a brace and secured a 3-1 home win against Hull. This, in some fans’ views, is enough to merit Giggs at least the opportunity to prove himself as a permanent manager. If Guardiola can do it at Barca, why not Giggs?

Giggs cons:

Quite simply, zero real experience. Whilst Giggs was an incredible player for United, that does not necessarily mean he will make an incredible manager. For example: Ole Gunnar Solskjaer failed to make it with Cardiff, Bruce hasn’t got the nous to manage a top club, Roy Keane couldn’t do it at Sunderland or Ipswich and, most recently, Gary Neville failed to live up to his own punditry as manager of Valencia. While Guardiola is an example of a legend becoming a successful manager at the same club, he is an exception, not the norm. The same cannot be expected of Giggs and if he was to fail, his golden reputation might be tarnished. Is that a risk the Welshman is willing to take?

Another serious blot on Giggs’ career is his association with Moyes and Van Gaal. As coach and assistant manager under respective reigns, if Van Gaal is sacked like Moyes was, for failing to reach the Champions League, then surely Giggs should get the boot, too? While the team is not his sole responsibility, Giggs has failed to influence both managers into a winning mentality and has clearly been unsuccessful in projecting a positive attitude on the players. Two of his long-term potential successors on the left wing, Memphis Depay and Adnan Januzaj, have reportedly poor attitudes when it comes to training. It is Giggs’ responsibility to be a role model and turn that attitude around, which he has so far failed to do.

 

Mourinho pros:

Mourinho stormed onto the European managerial scene in 2002/03 winning a treble (involving the Europa League) for Porto, before defying the odds and completing the ‘real deal’ treble (involving the Champions League) in the following season. His successful start never really ended; Mourinho went on to manage Chelsea (twice), Inter Milan, and Real Madrid, winning six league titles, six domestic cups and another Champions league trophy all in the space of 12 years. Since Sir Alex Ferguson’s retirement, Mourinho has stood head and shoulders above the other managerial heavyweights in terms of success. Manchester United seem to have forgotten the taste of success; the last title came to Old Trafford in 2013. If there was ever a man to guarantee trophies, Jose would be that man.

There are also clues regarding Mourinho’s love affair with United, most tellingly after his Los Blancos side defeated the 10-men Red Devils at Old Trafford, sending them out of the Champions League, and claiming that, “the best team lost”. An extremely unusual compliment given a man of his arrogance. Ferguson retired later that season and Mourinho reportedly broke down in tears when he heard that Moyes was to be the successor. The stage has been reset for the union he supposedly desires.

Mourinho cons:

As John Steinbeck stated in Of Mice and Men, “success comes with a price to pay”. The more keenly-eyed Wikipedia user would notice that Mourinho has not lasted more than three seasons at a single club. The high levels of performance from his players come with high levels of intensity from Mourinho; high intensity for a prolonged amount of time causes tension, which causes fracture. The Portuguese man has either moved from one club to another to fulfil ambition (e.g. Porto to Chelsea, Inter to Real) or because he has fractured the club with his intensity (e.g. Chelsea 2007, Real 2013, Chelsea 2015). While Mourinho is without doubt a serial winner, is the success justified by the probability that he will leave the club in disarray? What Manchester United need is stability, not a man to rock the boat any further.

Mourinho also has a reputation for not giving youth a chance; a philosophy that is deeply ingrained into United’s history. At Chelsea this season, he failed to spot the talents of youngsters such as Kennedy, Bertrand Traore, and Ruben Loftus-Cheek, all of whom have been rotated effectively into the first team by the current Chelsea coach, Guus Hiddink. The influx of Old Trafford academy products this season has been notable, especially the likes of Rashford, Fosu-Mensah, and Borthwick-Jackson. There is a fear surrounding the fanbase that Mourinho, if given the choice between buying superstars and integrating youth, would settle for the former.

 

Van Gaal pros:

As a decorated manager, there are few who can compete with Van Gaal’s illustrious career. Successful at Barcelona, Bayern Munich, Ajax, and most recently the Netherlands, the Dutchman has experience flowing out of every orifice. A Champions League trophy and seven league titles evidences success, no matter which club he has been at. Van Gaal is also renowned for leaving the foundations for future victory. At Barcelona, he famously had a back-room staff of Mourinho, Koeman and Guardiola, three current prosperous managers who learnt their trade from the Dutchman. It is no coincidence that the three most successful footballing institutions in their respective countries, Barcelona, Bayern Munich, and Ajax, were once managed by Van Gaal. His reputation for blending experienced quality with talented youth led to a lasting dynasty in each club and the same can be seen at United; his integration of Martial, Rashford and Borthwick-Jackson into the team with Schweinsteiger, Carrick, and Rooney provides a balance of raw pace with experienced heads, hopefully allowing the United youngsters to become the latest academy “class of 2016”.

Van Gaal cons:

The results! While the experienced Dutchman succeeded in retaining Champions League football in his debut season, he has fundamentally failed in mounting a title challenge (his own aim for his second season). Square pegs in round holes (the squarest of pegs in the roundest of holes being Ashley Young as a striker against Spurs), the uninspiring football, Rooney’s “special privileges”, the unnecessarily small squad and the scattergun transfer strategy. In a football world where clubs don’t have time to wait around for success, the Dutchman’s position is becoming increasingly untenable, especially if he fails to attain Champions League football. He has been given the time and the financial backing to create his own prosperous United squad, yet he has failed by the exacting standards he set himself.

 

Pole Fitness at the University of Manchester

During Freshers’ Week at the Society Fair many of us sign up for multiple societies, then go to one session and never return. Everyone has a society they stick to and Pole had me completely addicted! Everyone’s first session is a bit of a struggle as many of us stare blankly at the instructor as she spins graciously round the pole, then we proceed to tangle ourselves and end up in a heap on the floor.

Often us pole dancers can be subject to a lot of prejudice about the sport and many don’t understand or appreciate the skill and dedication required to take pole fitness to a high level. We are often overlooked as a sport and not taken seriously as individuals. To those of you reading this that still think its easy or just about looking sexy in heels then I challenge you to try just one class and you’ll never look at someone on the pole in the same way again. Everyone underestimates the core strength and flexibility Pole requires. Not only is it artistic but it’s a great way to build strength and keep fit and it really works; I came to my first class unable to manage one press up and now I’m amazed at what my body can do. As the weeks progress you can feel your body changing and building strength you never had. Like many sports, with pole, you get out of it what you put in. Progression is made by attending multiple classes and building on your own flexibility! Although it’s more appealing to girls as a society we encourage everyone and anyone who’s interested in the sport to try a class with us. Personally I love going to classes because of the range of moves we work on and the feeling of satisfaction you get when you finally hit that trick you’ve been struggling with.

Our society offers four classes a week for all levels, from beginner to advanced, and all styles of Pole from pole sport which focuses on strength to sexy pole; honouring our stripper roots with a racy high cardio routine class. We also offer regular pole jams which give our members an opportunity to practice moves outside of the studio, and, like most societies, we have socials on a regular basis to give everyone a chance to get to know each other, taking our pole with us whenever we can. A lot of our members love Pole so much they buy their own personal pole for practice at home and we love seeing everyone’s progression photos posted on our page! Our classes are not only fun but you really feel the workout and they’re great for building confidence too. The combination of artistic moves—like spins and strength moves—means there’s something for everyone: dancing types and sporty types.

Because Pole requires skin for grip, the clothing required to wear during classes is smaller than most sports, but come to class and you’ll realise what a necessity it is, this makes it a great sport for body confidence as we create a warm environment where anyone can feel comfortable in their own skin and this is something you can continue after University! As a society, we’re fortunate to have a relationship with a professional pole studio in Manchester with such friendly and experienced teachers who add to the fun and positive vibes of our classes! I’d encourage everyone to give Pole a try if you’re getting bored of the gym or just want to try something new, it’s definitely a conversation starter!

 

We asked some of our members to give us a line or two on why they loved Pole:

“Something I personally love about pole is that it’s a powerful, sensual and liberating exercise without feeling like a hefty workout! Like a sexy gym!”

“Pole Fitness is a creative way of doing workout, where you improve your strength and flexibility!”

“Pole is an excellent way to get in shape and build your confidence no matter what your size, shape, or level of fitness! And it’s such good fun.”

“Pole makes you feel so good about yourself and helps you build your self confidence.”

Fashion Class of 2016

One of the greatest things about Manchester, whether the city or the university, is its eclectic, vibrant, and confident style. Whether strolling to Sainsbury’s in your pyjamas or donning a pac-man outfit to the latest Pangaea, the distinct attitude that sets Manchester students apart from the rest is the ‘do-I-really-look-like-I-give-a-shit-what-you-think?’ defiance spread across the faces of the vast majority.

Wearing your personality on your sleeve is the recognised style of the city and it’s what makes dressing for every day that much more exciting. The opportunities to experiment with your wardrobe are endless, primarily because it is guaranteed you will never be the quirkiest on the street that day.

When I started at Manchester in 2014, I had no idea where the three years would take me. Admittedly, certain aspects were predictable: spending most of my student loan on clothes; devoting more time to Asos than Jstor; gaining a second home somewhere on the third floor of Affleck’s. But essentially, whilst many might start their university experience with degree aspirations and career goals in mind, you can never predict how the method of achieving these will change the fundamental elements of who you are.

After this photo was taken, I realised by coincidence that it perfectly illustrates four main aspects of my personal style: a quick mental scan through my wardrobe revealed that these elements infiltrate my wardrobe in some way, shape, or form every day.

Vintage treasures:
I had always enjoyed shopping in vintage stores and charity shops before starting at Manchester but upon my introduction to the Northern Quarter, enjoyment turned into an (arguably unhealthy) obsession and adoration. My cropped jumper is from COW, whilst my trousers are from a vintage sale held at the Ruby Lounge. Previously loved items are the crux of my wardrobe; I love how I am adding to the history of a piece of clothing, which has a past and even future I will never know about. I’m not one for corny attachments but my wardrobe is about as sentimental as I get!

Something statement:
I live by the rule that every outfit must have one bold statement: without, there is no eye-catching interest; with more than one, your outfit can become too crowded and less punchy.

A little flash of skin:
A complete sucker for a cropped top, my go-to outfit of choice is high-waisted jeans and a navel-baring top. I nearly always role up the end of my jeans too to change the shape and show off my shoes. Although a Southerner born and bred, a bare stomach even in winter makes me realise there may be a little Northern in me yet…

Power complex:
At 5’11’’, I naturally stand amongst the tallest in a crowd but heeled black boots are my weakness; I am rarely without them. As the shortest woman in my immediate family and possessing a slightly competitive edge, I donned my first pair of heeled boots six years ago and since never looked back, or rarely up, again.

Sophie Soar

 

Photo: The Mancunion

From first year, colour has always been important and, although my style has changed a lot, I still love a huge pop of colour three years later. In this picture, I’m in my halls, keeping it simple with an Aztec pattern dress and black strappy shoes. As I’ve gone through uni, I’ve realised that simplicity is key, sometimes I will even wear head to toe black and my colour will come through my nail and lip colour. With Manchester being such a great hub for fashion and, of course, shopping, my wardrobe collection has doubled! I have experimented a lot with what I love because Manchester and uni life had given me the platform to do that. Never be scared of trying something new and that goes for your make up too.

Perisha Kudhail

 

Photo: The Mancunion

I would say my style has more or less stayed the same since coming to Manchester, maybe slightly less out there, converse to the Fallowfield trend for increasing your alternative flair. Since becoming a student I have bought far less; I mainly rewear and recycle things I already own, so I favour items which are less recognisable when worn frequently. I have always loved inconspicuous skinny jeans, and always buy these from Zara, the only place which do trousers which don’t ‘bag out’ on me, and I hugely covet ankle boots, with my favourite being my pointed toe red snakeskin pair. Other favourite wardrobe features are long skirts in summer, backless tops, and different textured silver rings. I’m envious of how chic French models look; the model Caroline de Maigret is one of my icons—British Vogue featured her in a YouTube segment where she describes French style and ‘how to dress well’ which is endlessly cool. I’m a fan of the ‘normcore’ vibe; neutral colours and blankness of pattern make me happy. When I graduate I aspire to shop all the time in The Kooples, & Other Stories, and Whistles; I love how simple and eye-catching their looks are. My newest purchases have been dark navy/green silky culottes and some black ‘guy’ brogues, and I’m trying to decide if I’m brave enough to wear them both at the same time.

Rebecca Thomas

 

Photo: The Mancunion

I would say when it comes to my fashion sense, I have less of a style and more a uniform. Black skinny jeans, oversized/high-neck knitwear and white T-shirts (the underrated classic) feature pretty heavily on this set menu. Trainers are de rigueur. (Stylish and supportive, all in two lovely shoes. What’s not to love?) No matter how hard I may try a jazzy colour palette, I always fall back on some vibrant shades of grey. Everything stays pretty monochrome, with the occasional splash of blue denim. Spending a year living in France did not help matters, as I am pretty sure sporting coloured clothing across the Channel is punishable by law. I am dreading the time when I need a more grown-up wardrobe as the end of my university career draws nigh. Perhaps I will swap the skinny jeans for a chic fitted trouser à la French Vogue editor Emmanuelle Alt. As far as today’s fashion forecast is looking, however, I think I see myself dressing like a female Steve Jobs forever.
Jacket – Vintage Levi’s, Jumper – H&M, Jeans – Zara, Shoes – Adidas

Millie Kershaw

 

Photo: The Mancunion

My personal style is fairly simple. I want the clothes I wear to fit and flatter my body. New seasons bring new trends along with them, and I try to be open minded to the new styles available, but I never like to let the trends lead my taste. It is more about the current fashion trends adding to my style. I am a lover of black, denim and stripes; it is a rare day that I’m not wearing one of the three! They are so fabulously interchangeable and just work in my eyes. I’m not obsessed with bright colours; to me it’s whether they fit my mood. And when it comes to shoes, I think the pointier the better.

Sarah Kilcourse

 

Photo: The Mancunion

I call this look The Diamond Geezer.

Sports jacket and steel toe-cap boots shows I’m not going to a fucking picnic. I flash my Timex to any doubters. Long hair shows I’m in touch with my emotions n that. Slim fit navy jeans because what the fuck else is there. Brown belt to keep my trousers up.

Who am I wearing? Oxfam, Adidas, and sort of Ralph Lauren Polo. I say ‘sort of’ cause the man on the horse has lost his baton, so to speak. It’s fake, in other words. The rest of me is real though.

Henry Scanlan

 

Photo: The Mancunion

As Head Fashion Editor, you’d expect me to dress far more adventurously. Fashion, for me, is all about comfort. Baggy jumpers and thick scarves have always been my groove. I remember when I first moved to Manchester; I was overwhelmed by the five-storey Urban Outfitters on Market Street. Each time I visited during Freshers’ Week, I swooned after an oversized navy jumper fashioning red raccoons until I finally cracked and made my first mancunian purchase. Three years later, it sits contently amongst my evergrowing jumper collection, not having been worn since Christmas of First Year. My impulse buys have become few and far between as my student loan has become almost non-existent (big shout out to Student Finance), but I definitely still break from time to time. This block-coloured Zara jumper was bought on a whim after a long and hard day. Retail therapy and all that…

Kassi Allcock

 

Photo: The Mancunion

How would I define my style? I can’t really. A lot of people tell me I am excellent at co-ordinating but in actuality I just only like a few colours, makes life a lot more simple. The outfit I am wearing here is a bit more snazzy than my everyday uni-wear which would consist of jeans, timberland boots and a knitted jumper. I have the promise of cocktails after a six hour library session so went for more of a versatile day to night look. My skirt is from a really cool shop in Withington called Mockingbirds which has helped shape my wardrobe and get rid of my student loan. I don’t think my style has changed that much since I have come to university, apart from I have acquired a lot more pyjamas.

Kathryn Murray

The Seven Study Sinners

The University Kingdom is rife with a large variety of different species, but during the annual Exam Season in the summer months, 7 new specimens emerge and seize control of campus and its surrounding area. They may have binge-eating as a common trait, but other than that their characteristics are far from the same.

Perhaps the most common species is the Procrastinator. They may not be able to tell you what they’ve been learning for the past six months, or where all of their time has gone, but they do know the lyrics to every Eminem rap, the full account of How I Met Your Mother, and can now speak fluent Welsh.

Now if you listen quietly, you’ll be able to hear a cackling sound coming from the kitchen. It’s that ‘study sesh’ that the Psychology clan of Brainstormers are having which sounds too much fun to be educational. The house, tainted with the smell of baking to act as their study snacks (they iced the cake with ‘Freud’ so they’re still learning), becomes a social hub, decorated top-to-bottom with comically large sheets of paper full of these so-called ‘brainstorms’.

Photo: chloebaileyx @Flickr

The cleanest of them all is the fresh-faced, smartly dressed Library-goer who arises early to bagsy a computer. Breezing out of the house with a fully-prepared rucksack at the crack of dawn, their main role in the University Kingdom is to add to the guilt and stress of the other studiers. But don’t be fooled! There are many sub-species to the Library-goer: the ITV Player addicts, the ‘I’ll-do-all-my-printing-at-uni-then-go-home-and-tell-myself-that-was-all-I-needed-to-do-for-today’ phoneys, and the poor, despairing ‘reading but not retaining’ pupils.

After spending three days drafting the revision schedule, and having blown half their student loan on stationery, the Post-It note warrior is now hidden under a mound of brightly coloured paper. Need a stapler? They have three sizes, and 14 colours (but you can’t use magenta because it’s their favourite). Need a sticker? No. Neither do they, but they reward themselves for every top-notch poster with a gold star, secretly knowing that, deep down, they’re not worthy of it. That spelling mistake on the mind-map isn’t glaringly obvious, but they know it’s there. They will try to stick it onto the wall but, inevitably, it’ll eventually have to be redrawn. After all, it was the wrong shade of blue anyway.

Photo: srtuba @Flickr

The Caffeine-oholic pulled an all-nighter again last night and was surprisingly productive, as you can tell from the waft of success coming from their room… or perhaps that’s just the sickly sweet odour of Red Bulls. As you try to sleep every night, the constant pulse of the bass from their speakers vibrates through the Kingdom. A persistent reminder that people are learning stuff whilst you’re just lying there, thinking about all the stuff that you have to learn.

There’s something stirring upstairs. A strange aura fills the house. The Wallower has emerged. They’ve risen from their pit in a state of confusion, a layer of grease, and wearing the crumbs of last week’s cheese and onion crisps in a trail from chin-to-PJ top. Apparently self-hygiene isn’t important to everyone during  Exam Season. We don’t know what they’ve been doing, we don’t know how much work they’ve done, but we do know that that they need a nice, long shower.

The seventh, and perhaps most deadly, study sinner? The self-proclaimed Moron who, having insisted that they haven’t done any work at all, comes out with better results than everybody else. Fuck them!

Festival Preview: Bilbao BBK Live

Bilbao, Spain
7th – 9th July

For festivalgoers looking for something slightly further afield and hopefully warmer, this year’s BBK Live Festival, Bilbao promises a wealth of good acts over the course of the weekend.

Headlining this year’s festival are indie giants Arcade Fire, Pixies and Foals. The support is no less impressive. Alongside the more established acts of New Order and Hot Chip, BBK have booked some of 2015’s best acts to perform this year.

Grimes, Father John Misty, Tame Impala and Courtney Barnett all made it onto our top 10 albums of 2015. Most of the rest line up consists of Spanish and Basque acts, including Belako and Greenclass, who are both worth keeping an eye out for.

Taking place in the scenic hills overlooking Bilbao, there is a 30 minute bus transfer to the city allowing the more culturally and culinary inclined festivalgoers to spend mornings sampling what the Basque city has to offer. Pintxos and drinks in the city centre are an affordable way to make your boozy festival experience feel somewhat more classy. The Guggenheim probably need not even be mentioned.

Tickets for the weekend start at £100 with camping. Moreover, coming in at just over £200, including a return flight, BBK is a strong choice for those seeking a great European festival at similar prices to some of the larger ones on offer here in the UK this year.

Live: Half Moon Run

Albert Hall

18th March 2016

7/10

I went into this gig with few expectations, enjoyed myself more than I thought I would, and left with more of an understanding of how important a producer on an album is.

Half Moon Run’s two albums are alright, they’re not bad in any respect. ‘Full Circle’ stands out as a cool track on their debut album, Dark Eyes, but knowing only this track did not help typify, for me, what Half Moon Run would be like live.

Listen to their two albums, then add two frontmen who love country music—I’m sorry, it’s probably trendier to say Americana—and also showing off. Their four-piece harmonies were better, guitar solos stood out more, American folk influences were clear, and each song ended in such an abrupt way that it left you wanting more.

All in all it was a really fun show, but you wouldn’t have been able to guess so going from their records. Even the crowd seemed slightly surprised—pleasantly so—that Half Moon Run threw their chill out of the window at the Albert Hall.

Watching the two frontmen of the Canadian four-piece working off each other worked well; half the time you felt like you were watching them play intimately and awkwardly in their bedroom as teenagers, the other half felt like they were flinging all they had at their audience, totally relishing centre stage. At times it felt over dramatic, and I cringed violently when the singer Devon Portielje decided to play a guitar solo with his teeth.

Seeing Half Moon Run live though made me appreciate the music they’ve made much more, but also made me sad that their albums were produced in such as a way as to not showcase the potential shown on stage.

Listen to their Spotify Session version of ‘Call Me in the Afternoon’ if you don’t believe me.

Album review: Yeasayer – Amen & Goodbye

Released 1st April via Mute

6/10

Yeasayer are a frustrating bunch. Of all the experimental Brooklyn alt bands that emerged during the noughties, they’ve rather unfairly become shorthand for a certain type of Pitchfork band. Around the time that TV On the Radio and Dirty Projectors discovered more critical acclaim and more fans—having brilliantly located the sweet spot between daring, mind-frazzling experimentation and accessibility without compromising their sound—Yeasayer sat out any chances of greater appeal, bar 2010’s hugely enjoyable Odd Blood. That’s fair enough: Liars aren’t likely to release a sugary assortment of chart-topping hits, but they definitely have more fans. You might wonder why Yeasayer aren’t as popular as their peers; their albums have been pretty good, yet consistency isn’t a strong point of theirs: 2012’s Fragrant World, if well-produced, was particularly patchy.

Amen & Goodbye, the band’s fourth, answers why Yeasayer lack a large following. There’s just too much going on, particularly on ‘Dead Sea Scrolls’: it doesn’t know if it wants to be clever art rock, steeped in staccato horns, or agitated psych-pop. ‘Gerson’s Whistle’, like the beatless ‘Prophecy Gun’, lacks something to anchor it. Nevertheless, it is certainly interesting and genuinely inventive, filled with fabulously pretty arrangements, not least the faintly overwhelming chorus of massed voices and plinking piano—though you won’t remember it in any hurry. You’re not sure what overall effect it is after; there’s just no cohesion.

‘Half Asleep’ strolls in on a cloud of subdued funk and eastern influences: sumptuous, yes, but memorable? Hardly. Once again, confusion stands in for cohesion. Still, the jerky off-kilter synthpop of ‘Silly Me’ sparkles. The riffs and vocal hooks hit their marks, the serpentine melody, furnished with muted brass, is zany as it is tuneful. Likewise, ‘I Am Chemistry’ just works. As ever, Yeasayer’s stubbornly nonconformist pop spasms are in spectacular abundance—listen as it shifts from shapeless, churning worldbeat to grinding electropop to baroque balladry—but never serve as annoying distractions. There’s no discernible chorus, yet the bustling sea of sounds and styles is winning. Meanwhile, the canned applause on ‘Child Prodigy’ is self-regarding and pompous.

All is not lost however. ‘Cold Night’ is bright, incandescent pop; it succeeds where other tracks fail by virtue of it stripping away the excess and ploughing a superb, unfussy melody. Unfortunately, nothing here grabs you by the scruff of the neck and demands your attention quite like fellow experimentalists Gang Gang Dance’s glorious Eye Contact. Great psychedelia leads you through a door and into a world of colourful, mind-expanding possibilities. Yeasayer are too busy trying to sell you the house before they even let you in.

Win Pangaea tickets with Fuse FM

Fuse FM are giving away two free tickets to Pangaea Festival, which will be returning at the end of the summer exam period.

As part of the new Fuse FM Experience, which broadcasts every weekday between 3pm and 5pm, the competition for listeners will run all this week

All entrants need to do is download the TuneIn radio app onto their smartphone, tune into Fuse FM, take a screenshot and e-mail it to [email protected].

Currently Fuse FM, the University of Manchester’s student radio station, can be listened to live on TuneIn on the desktop or mobile.

Malia Bouattia wins NUS Presidency

Current NUS Black Students’ Officer Malia Bouattia has been elected President of the National Union of Students at their National Conference.

Bouattia beat incumbent President Megan Dunn who has served as NUS President for one year. Despite a number of Union Presidents including Hertfordshire SU’s, Bath SU’s and Keele SU’s supporting Dunn, Bouattia beat Dunn by 371 votes to 328.

Malia will become the first-ever black woman President of the NUS since its creation in 1922.

Dunn promised in her manifesto to create a fund to defend Unions from government cuts and took an official pro-EU position for the NUS. Bouattia promised to bring minority groups to “the heart of everything we [NUS] do.”

At the University of Manchester Students’ Union’s NUS primaries, Bouattia was picked as the delegates’ mandated choice for President. The other candidates picked were Sorana Vieru (re-running for VP Higher Education), Shelly Asquith (re-running for VP Welfare), Sahaya James (running for VP Union Development), and Samayya Afzal (running for VP Society & Citizenship).

Bouattia has been at the heart of discussion recently over past comments she has made about Jewish Societies and Zionism. These concerns led to the Oxford University Students’ Union deciding not to vote for her in the Presidential elections, though this loss of support was not enough to lose her the election.

Review: Shakespeare’s King Lear

As one of Shakespeare’s most notoriously difficult roles to play, there have not been many versions of high renown, resulting in steep pressure and intense comparison for any new production, in this case with the recent National Theatre version directed by Sam Mendes. Nevertheless, this juggernaut reading, celebrating Talawa’s 30th anniversary as well as 400 years since the death of the Bard himself, under the direction of Michael Buffong, managed to achieve a balance of independence and authenticity with seamless grace.

In the infamous title role was Don Warrington, whose portrayal of Lear certainly reached the high bar. Though his levels of rage plateaued at maximum decibel fairly early on, his transition into madness avoided the temptation of searching for a definitive turning point, instead slipping fluidly scene by scene. The subtlety of his tics was attentively approached, and hints of the former Lear were shown through the thick veil of insanity with masterful sensitivity. A favourite speech of mine, Act V Scene iii’s ‘Gilded Butterflies’ monologue was approached with a tenderness I have not before seen, and the death speech which followed was, pleasingly, not overworked, but happily appropriate to salute the character Warrington has so sensitively crafted. One of the few Lears to master not only the hard-hearted tyranny of the play’s opening, but also the rage of Act III’s storm, and the wounded nature of the man “more sinned against than sinning”, Warrington’s portrayal is nothing short of impressive.

Particular attention should be paid to Philip Whitchurch as the Earl of Gloucester, a role which is often overlooked, but is also incredibly difficult to play: A figure who fickly changes the object of his fatherly affection, Gloucester must command the sympathies of both his wronged son, and the weary audience. This was certainly achieved, playing the moment at which Gloucester loses his eyes not with writhing pain, as if often the case, but with the haunting stillness of losing our most valued of senses. This is certainly befitting of what the play teaches us; that no matter how harsh the character, we all experience pain and suffering in the same way.

Alfred Enoch’s Edgar must also be given due praise for a role which demands maturity and skill in its effective multi-rolling as Edgar’s Poor Tom and Beggar-man. As Poor Tom he drew attention without playing a caricature, although some of his lines were unfortunately swallowed. This aside, his treatment of physicality, as the demands on his character changed, was well thought-out.

The relationship between the three of Lear’s daughters was another strong point, the chemistry between them clear from the very first scene. However, it was a shame that the individual performances were lacking here. Debbie Korley’s Regan was unfortunately hugely underwhelming, underrepresenting a character whom I believe to be one of Shakespeare’s most insidiously evil; Pepter Lunkuse’s Cordelia was pleasingly youthful, but lacked the subtlety necessary for a role with such bold character yet such little stage-time, and appeared unfortunately overcooked in places. Rakie Ayola’s Goneril, however, provided the intensity and bitterness which is essential for Lear’s eldest daughter, whilst creating particularly palpable tension with Fraser Ayres’ malicious Edmund.

Amidst all this doom and gloom, Shakespeare does provide us with brief, occasional comic relief in the form of Oswald and the Fool, and these moments were well brought-out by Thomas Coombes and Miltos Yerolemou respectively, the former giving the audience a laugh a minute when on stage with his consistent, slimy portrayal.

The Royal Exchange is particularly well known for its costumes and sets, and this production was certainly no exception. In fact, I would argue that it was the work of the crew behind the scenes which gave the play such impact. The first thing you notice at the beginning of the performance is that the Royal Exchange’s traditional ‘in-the-round’ stage, as well as the floor of the auditorium, is covered with soil—an accurate metaphor for the grit and filth of ‘Nature’ around which the play revolves.

The stage itself was particularly interesting, a raised platform with a circle in the middle, which was itself tipped on an angle. This was particularly clever in Act I Scene i, during which Lear was sitting in his throne on the outer-ledge, in such a position that a step forward would be a step down, thus giving the very subtle but very effective illusion that his throne is above those looking towards him. However, this ledge, or similarly the resultant one opposite it, should surely have been used in Act IV Scene vi, where Gloucester attempts to commit suicide by jumping from a cliff, unaware that what lies in front of him is but a small mound.

What also caught my eye during the opening scene was the use of authentic flame torches, dotted around the outside of the stage and, more impressively, the use of stage lighting to accurately match the dull orange glow they gave off, giving the atmosphere of the play an intensity from the very beginning. For the most part, the lighting overcame the inevitable difficulties which arise from theatre in-the-round, save for a couple of unfortunate moments where Norman Bowman’s Cornwall was shrouded by shadow centre-stage.

Nevertheless, this was certainly compensated for by the inspired use of sound technology. If the spectator were to step outside the glass chamber which encases the auditorium, they would hear the dialogue from inside projected from speakers. A brilliantly simple way of keeping those off-stage on the same page as those on-stage. However, this was particularly effective in the way that, from inside the auditorium, the outside speakers could just about be heard, creating an acoustical effect reminiscent of an old church or hall. Immediately, therefore, what happens on stage takes on yet another layer of importance and gravity, giving Shakespeare’s story the air of myth or legend appropriate for the fables on which it is based. These off-stage speakers were also especially effective at times when entries from, for example, Lear and his entourage of a hundred knights, arrive on horseback with bugles sounding and horse-hooves pounding.

Often overlooked in these productions is the blocking of individual scenes, but praise must be given here to a particular moment which caught my attention during Act III. Here, the movement between the characters of Edgar, Lear and Gloucester ingeniously shielded Edgar from the eyes of Gloucester, the very man from whom Edgar was hiding, but the only man who would have recognised him.

However, what made Act III truly spectacular was the impressive technical feat of the storm sequence, which closed the first half. It is interesting to see how these scenes are approached from production to production, as often attempting real on-stage water can be a disaster. However, much like the 2008 Trevor Nunn filmed version, the use of water was truly effective, but here especially so as the water turned the soil into mud. What really created the illusion of the storm though was the combination of waterworks with the stunning lighting and sound. More than any other point in the first half, the audience was entirely encapsulated by the world that had been created. It was thus a real shame that the beginning of the second half, still set mid-storm, was rainless—perhaps technicalities had prevented this, but it was a shame nonetheless.

Another, similar inconsistency was the use of stage-blood. All was approached on the right foot at first, with Edmund’s (slightly underacted) self-harm, where the blood was certainly realistic. There was also, of course, the gut-wrenching eye-gouging of Gloucester, artfully done by Norman Bowman as Cornwall, which left a delightful chunk of eye on stage for the remainder of the play. However, the throat-slitting of Cornwall’s guard was definitely bloodless, and Edmund’s battle sequence was, in the context of previous choreographed sword-fights, somewhat embarrassing to watch, taking me back to the days of A-Level Drama monologues with invisible surroundings and props. I will stand by the opinion that if a production commits to something such as live blood, or even food and drink, then it must stick to it entirely so as not to invalidate its use in the first place.

These, however, are little things in the context of an exceptional production. Michael Buffong has painted the world of King Lear with vivid perception and stunning sensitivity, with the palette of an incredibly strong cast and beautifully detailed costumes, and with a canvas of astonishing set design and technology.

My Shakespeare teacher at school told me that everybody has their own definitive Lear: that will certainly be true of this production for many.

King Lear runs at the Royal Exchange Theatre from 1st April – 7th May, and at Birmingham Repertory Theatre from 19th – 28th May.

Classic Review: Where is the Friend’s Home?

“As long as the protagonist wants something, the audience will want something.” – David Mamet.

This idea is well executed by the master filmmaker Abbas Kiarostami in his first film of the Koker trilogy, Where is the Friend’s Home? This film was awarded the Bronze Prize at the 1989 Locarno Film Festival. The Koker trilogy was coined by film critics and academics. According to Kiarostami, the films were shot coincidentally in the region of Koker, Iran. This is the film by which Kiarostami announced himself to world cinema. The title of the film is derived from Sohrab Sepeheri’s poem, Khaneh Ye Dost Kojast?

The film regards the simple idea where 8-year-old Ahmad must return his friend Mohmad Reda Nematzadeh’s notebook that he had taken by mistake. If he doesn’t return it in time, his friend will get expelled from school.

The film explores the beautiful geography of the Koker region, the journey from Koker to Posteh (Nematzadeh’s village). One particular image portrayed in the film on Ahmad’s journey taken from Sepeheri’s poem is the zigzag path on the mountain with an olive tree on the top. This also shows the moment where Ahmad defies his mother and leaves his house to return the notebook back to his friend.

The film also strays from the narrative and focuses on the thoughts of an old man. According to him, young kids should be beaten to discipline them more, but in his narcissism he forgets about the fact that Ahmad is learning discipline and compassion through his own experiences by going through the search of his friend’s house.

The film ends with a small flower kept in Nematzadeh’s notebook. According academics, it was a gift from Kiarostami to the two boys for their selflessness and their friendship in this hostile world.

Premier League 2015-16: Team of the year

The 2015-16 Premier League season is rapidly drawing to a close. Inevitably people are now debating who they think have been the best players this season and what their best XI would be, which, thanks to the many players whose performances have exceeded expectations this year, is no easy task.

The Mancunion is no different, so here is, in James Haughton’s opinion, the 2015-16 Premier League Team of the Season—4-4-2 formation.

GK: David de Gea (Manchester United)

While it has been another turbulent season for Louis Van Gaal’s side, with each positive result seemingly followed by a crushing disappointment, David de Gea has maintained the phenomenal form that has earned him the reputation as one of the world’s most sought-after goalies. He combines an exceptional shot-stopping, with a disciplined command of his box and regular outstanding encounters with crosses. An early 2-1 defeat to Swansea, where Sergio Romero deputised for de Gea, demonstrated the Spaniard’s vitality to the team.

RB: Kyle Walker (Tottenham Hotspur)

While not as shocking as Leicester’s stratospheric rise, nobody predicted Tottenham’s sustained brilliance at the beginning of the season. The improvements made by the players under Mauricio Pochettino have been typified by Kyle Walker. Whereas he was previously thought of as a defensive liability, this season has seen many fewer lapses in judgement. His attacking prowess hasn’t been neutered either, providing an attacking outlet out wide and creating space for Spurs’ attacking midfielders in the process.

CB: Toby Alderweireld (Tottenham Hotspur)

After a successful loan spell at Southampton last season, Alderweireld has developed into a phenomenal centre-back this season. His centre-back partnership with Jan Vertonghen, a fellow Belgian, has been key for Spurs this season, with them complementing each other brilliantly. Even after Vertonghen’s injury, Alderweireld has formed an impressive partnership with Kevin Wimmer. Alderweireld’s tackling and ability to read the game, in particular, have impressed, and his heading prowess has proved vital at both ends of the pitch.

CB: Wes Morgan (Leicester City) (c)

While Robert Huth would also have been worthy of a place in this line-up, his teammate just gets in ahead of him. Leicester have relied heavily on their defensive solidity recently—they conceded 17 goals in their first ten league games and only 14 since then. At the heart of that defence, Morgan has epitomised Leicester’s willingness to work and successfully nullified opposition attackers with his ability to head the ball, and tackle and block.

LB: Christian Fuchs (Leicester City)

While Danny Simpson narrowly lost out to Kyle Walker, Leicester’s other full-back, Christian Fuchs, who is captain of the Austrian national side, makes it into this best XI. Throughout the season, Fuchs has rigorously maintained his discipline, knowing when to intercept opposition attacks or support his centre-halves. Fuchs has not neglected his attacking duties, however, and his defence-splitting through ball to Jamie Vardy at home to Manchester United is a testament to that.

DM: N’Golo Kanté (Leicester City)

A £5.6 million signing from Caen in the summer, Kanté has attracted rave reviews for his performances this season, with rumours of £20 million moves to the likes of PSG and Arsenal surfacing. His tenacious tackling and tireless running have allowed him to hassle countless opponents, but he has also demonstrated a skillful touch and an ability to pass the ball, that have helped to launch devastating counter-attacks.

RM: Dmitri Payet (West Ham United)

Another summer signing, Payet has flourished in a side rejuvenated under Slaven Bilic, scoring nine goals and having eight assists. Payet has adapted well to the rigours of the Premier League, being able to outmuscle opposition defenders as well as silkily weave past them. Since the turn of the year he has also showcased a talent for scoring sublime free-kicks.

LM: Riyad Mahrez (Leicester City)

Mahrez’s pace and trickery have confounded opposition defenders throughout the season, but unlike many tricky wingers, there have been no doubts as to his end product, scoring 16 goals and creating 11 in 33 games this season. His wonderful goal against Chelsea, where he beautifully controlled a diagonal ball with his instep, bamboozled César Azpilicueta and then placed his shot past Thibaut Courtois, in a 2-1 victory, has been one of his many highlights this season.

AM: Dele Alli (Tottenham Hotspur)

Despite playing in English football’s third tier last year, Alli has not just been a peripheral figure for Spurs, but a linchpin of the side. His dynamism and work-rate have been fantastic, and from the start, he has possessed the technical skill and creativity needed to best Premier League defenders, whether it be by providing an inch-perfect cross for Spurs’ winner against Watford or scoring a Goal of the Season contender to beat Crystal Palace 2-1.

FW: Harry Kane (Tottenham Hotspur)

Quietening those who claimed he was a one-season wonder, Harry Kane has scored 22 goals so far this season to top the scoring charts and take Tottenham to second in the Premier League, which would be their highest finish since 1963. Kane has shown over the past two seasons that he is a brilliant finisher, whose technique and ability to involve teammates in attacks are underrated.

FW: Jamie Vardy (Leicester City)

Only four seasons after playing non-league football for Fleetwood Town, Jamie Vardy has broken the Premier League record for the most consecutive games scored in, and his goals have propelled Leicester right up through the table. His importance to the team cannot be underestimated, since his pace, along with that of Mahrez, allows the team to be so consistently effective on the counter-attack. His finishing, too, has impressed, with his first strike at home to Liverpool being the most spectacular example of that.

Subs: Jack Butland (Stoke City), Jan Vertonghen (Tottenham Hotspur), Eric Dier (Tottenham Hotspur), Mesut Özil (Arsenal), Mousa Dembélé (Tottenham Hotspur), Romelu Lukaku (Everton), Sergio Agüero (Manchester City).

Worst XI: Any 11 Aston Villa players.

Review: Tibor Reich

A short British Pathe film from 1957 shows footage of a genteel, bow-tied man cutting and arranging square patterns on his work bench. With a joyful newsreel platitude, the arch RP voiceover announces that the subject, textile designer Tibor Reich, manages to marry the ‘wonders of nature and the ingenuity of man.’ Next comes some footage of him crouching by a riverbed to take close-up photographs of blades of grass that he will later use as the basis of his patterns. The Whitworth’s latest textile exhibition does nothing more that convert the chirpy vision of the Pathe film, full of postwar affluence and Council of Industrial Design-style promotion, into a miniscule retrospective: polite, respectful, even awed, but with little real insight into the artist.

Tibor Reich’s career and vibrant artistic vision is the result of his European Modernist education and industrial training. Born in Budapest in 1916 into a family of Jewish textile industrialists, he became a decorated student, moving from formal Weimar Bauhaus training, Viennese textile schools, and eventually Leeds University. His Modernist background then became absorbed into the postwar drive for proud national declarations of British design in the form of the Festival of Britain in 1951. After creating his own company, Tibor Ltd. in 1946, he experimented with fibres, photographic sources and ‘deep-texture’ fabrics and gained a host of commercial clients. He lived through an age of nationalist art exhibitions, a scene that is lost to our own age of globalised art fairs and inflated ‘art world’ economics. Unfortunately, this history is limited to a few captions on the gallery wall.

The curators package Reich as a timid Hungarian Ambassador for Soft Fabrics circa 1956. The first room takes a cursory look at some angular Bauhaus architectural drawings (where is the background of Werskstatte, Stolz, and Klimt that obviously play a huge role?). Some comic sketches of shrouded Hungarian women are blown up on the wall next to some ideas for jugs and a single board about his own swanky two-floor house, notorious for its free-standing, onion-shaped fireplace, build at the height of his career. The main room shows his textiles dangling from the ceiling like a messy Moroccan stall. (Also the room where the jolly Pathe announcer is played annoyingly on loop). The largest space is taken over by a selection of 1950’s wallpaper designs, and though they establish a background of professional innovation (the Palladio range designed by Richard and Guy Busby were made using the then-novel method of screen-prin) it seems like an irrelevance. Large scrolls are pinned against the wall as though the Rothko Chapel had moved into the backroom of Homebase.

Reich’s designs are brilliant and deserve a far better retrospective. The postwar prevalence of grandiose exhibitions is lost and this quite unfair, the Pathe newsreel version of art history is no way to access this important time period.

For more information about the Reich exhibition and The Whitworth’s impressive textile collection: Tibor Reich. Open until August 2016.

Tinder tales

“Most people probably enjoy a bit of rough and tumble in the bedroom, the odd bite here, and a scratch or two there. But have you ever been bitten so hard you literally bled onto your pillow? That’s what happened to me on my last Tinder date. Conversation had been ordinary, foreplay unremarkable; I would never have guessed that she was a vampire. Then suddenly, out of nowhere she sinks her teeth into my neck and tries to take a chunk out. I yell out ‘AAAHHHHHOOOOWWWWW!’, waking all of my housemates with screams of pain. I’m still trying to decide whether or not the pleasure was worth the pain.”

Photo: The Mancunion

“So I take this girl out on a date, one thing leads to another and she ends up staying at mine. Pretty harmless, right? Wrong. But I wasn’t to know that until I embarked on my daily pampering ritual the following morning. Like many men, I’m a fan of that Mint and Tea Tree shower gel for reasons I’m sure you can guess for yourself. Unfortunately, this product doesn’t mix well with open wounds. Much to my horror and agony, I discovered this very fact for myself whilst in the shower. At closer inspection of the area of searing pain, I realised that it resembled what I imagine it would look like after a passionate night with the likes of Edward Scissorhands. Then again, maybe he’d have been a more gentle lover?”

Photo: zoup7667@Fickr

 

Catfish 

“Met this girl on Tinder, got the mates’ approval, even verified on Snapchat. So I arranged to meet her at Revs in Fallowfield, a classic Tinder date spot. Waiting outside, she calls me telling me she’s nearly there. Just to get things straight, I wasn’t looking for a marriage but difficult not to be disappointed.

“I’m facing the former BaaBar and a girl comes round the corner on the phone. Not bad, pretty chuffed actually. All of a sudden, I’m tapped on the shoulder from behind and my actual Tinder date greets me. Much to my astonishment, the girl in front of me looks as if she’d eaten her Tinder self and is wearing every foundation available in Selfridges. Clearly, my shock was not well concealed as she asks me: ‘Are you okay? You look really confused.’ The gentleman that I am, I brushed it off with a smile and proceeded to guide her into Revs whilst plotting my exit plan.

“The barmaid at Revs definitely knew from the expression on her face. Drinks bought, we sat down and she necked her double vodka and lemonade as I cautiously sipped my beer. First strategy, make her dislike me: Her: ‘I have three cats’, Me: ‘I fucking hate cats’. I don’t though, I actually quite like them. Upon discovering that she studied Politics, I informed her that I was probably going to vote BNP in the following election. Disclaimer: This was my desperate response to the situation. As that strategy failed, I pulled the ‘Emergency phonecall card’ and stared passionately at the table whilst attempting to keep a straight face.

“When I went to make my exit, she didn’t make it easy. At first, she doubted me, then proceeded to follow me down the road at five feet’s distance. When I finally neared my place, I turned and asked her if she needed help getting home. In response she offered to wait until my “emergency” was over and we could continue with her date. The farce was up and I eventually came clean that I didn’t want to continue the date (mainly because my mate was standing 50 metres away, pissing himself laughing). Her completely understandable response was ‘Wanker’ and she consequently stormed off.”

 

“When I met this girl she seemed jovial and pretty. But I quickly realised she was on a phenomenal comedown from the night before and could barely string a sentence together. Her jaw ached and despite my best efforts to lift her spirits she sat there dejected for the better part of three hours, at points with tears in her eyes. She turned her nose up at the bottle of wine I’d bought, so out of desperation, I drank the bottle, went to the bar to buy another and bolted.”

 

“Our first Tinder date went spectacularly. We wandered around a London park for the afternoon arguing about everything under the sun: art, literature, who was more posh, and the best type of coffee. ‘This is the one!’ I thought. We had a real rapport intellectually and physically. But suddenly, after 10 weeks, she stopped answering my messages and blocked me on social media. I was left heart broken. ‘How had she slipped away? What had I done wrong?!’ I asked around a bit and apparently she’d had a long-term boyfriend the whole time. I was just there filling the gap while he was on his gap year.”

Top 5: Movie ending songs

5) ‘Always Look on the Bright Side of Life’ by Eric Idle – Monty Python’s Life of Brian
It may not be the most musically excellent song ever written, but it ends one of cinema’s greatest and sharpest comedies with an appropriately hilarious note. Just reading the title on this page will be enough to get that iconic whistle into your head for the rest of the day.

 

4) ‘Baby, You’re a Rich Man’ by The Beatles – The Social Network
David Fincher has proved before that he has a keen ear for choosing music to end his films (see Fight Club and Zodiac), and The Social Network demonstrates this at its finest. As Mark Zuckerberg sits back, having won the world but losing his soul, this Beatles track sings out with a heaped-spoonful of irony.

 

3) ‘Adagio for Strings’ by Samuel Barber – The Elephant Man
One of the most moving endings of a film in cinema, Barber’s ‘Adagio for Strings’ plays as John Merrick dies while trying to sleep without the support he needs for his deformed head, in an attempt to be like everyone else. The beautiful string music heightens the tragedy of this sympathetic and misunderstood character.

 

2) ‘My Way’ by Sid Vicious – Goodfellas
No list about music in movies would be complete without a nod to Martin Scorsese. Part of what is arguably the greatest soundtrack of all time, this Sex Pistols cover of ‘My Way’ makes us feel Henry Hill’s ever defiant attitude as he is forced into  a witness protection scheme and flashes back on his life, living his dream as a gangster.

 

1) ‘We’ll Meet Again’ by Vera Lynn – Dr Strangelove
The end of Stanley Kubrick’s ultimate black comedy Dr Strangelove saw the world launched into the full throes of a nuclear war, while ‘We’ll Meet Again’ plays with absolute comic absurdity. No other film will make you laugh so hard and feel so terrified at the same time, and this ending sequence captures this feeling perfectly.