If you thought life in the UK couldn’t sink any lower amidst recession, endless strikes, and dreadful weather, think again. There’s more bad news on the horizon, as experts predict that retirement age will climb to 71 by 2050. I wish I was kidding. It’s a punchline no one finds funny, yet it’s the latest addition to the litany of hardships facing Britons.
Let’s face it, we’ve all thought about our future plans. Perhaps they involve lounging on exotic beaches, sipping cocktails, and finally mastering the art of leisure. As the retirement age keeps rising, those dreams are quickly turning into a harsh illusion, slipping further away. With the current housing crisis rendering it virtually impossible for young people to even get a foothold on the housing ladder, the prospect of the retirement age soaring to 71 feels like yet another brutal slap in the face.
If there’s one thing young people can agree on, it’s that we’ve had it up to here with the absurdity of it all. I mean, just the other day my friends and I were fantasising about the glory days and picturing ourselves causing mayhem in the same retirement home in 45 years. But never in my wildest dreams did I think we’d still be slaving away well into our seventies before we even get a shot at retirement. Sometimes I wonder if the people in charge are just playing a giant game of “how much can we mess with Gen-Z before they snap?”
First, they hike up housing prices so high that buying a shoebox in London requires selling your soul to the devil, and now they’re telling us we’ll be working until we’re collecting our pension slip on mobility scooters. Call me crazy, but last time I checked retirement was supposed to involve a bit of bingo, not trying to remember where you left your reading glasses while you’re stuck in a Zoom meeting at age 71. But hey, who needs a pension when you’ve got memes to sustain you, am I right?
At this rate, we’ll all be retiring to some dystopian future where the only thing left to enjoy is complaining about the weather and reminiscing about the days when avocado toast was still affordable. Speaking of which, if I see another interview featuring an elderly person lamenting about the younger generation’s indulgence in luxuries, such as travel and avocado toast, while boasting about their ability to climb the socioeconomic ladder and retire comfortably, I’ll lose it.
