With eight discerning bean critics, two cans of six different types of beans, two loaves of bread, butter, a playlist of bean-themed songs e.g. ‘Since You’ve Bean Gone’, we set about our poll. To make it fair, the judges were not told which brand of bean was which. The results were fascinating – it appears that Branston, Tesco and Marks and Spencer beans have overtaken the mighty giant that is Heinz. Tesco’s turned out to be a favourite considering their beans are significantly cheaper than the big names.
| Brand of beans | Price | Average mark out of 5 | Favourite comments |
| Branston | 59p | 4.6 | Melts in mouth |
| Heinz | 69p | 2.8 | Like eating beans from a swimming pool – chloriney |
| Marks and Spencer | 53p | 3.4 | Beantastic |
| Sainsbury’s Basics | 27p | 1.3 | Lots of bean skin, tastes like bad curry |
| Spar Value | 35p | 0.6 | Mouldy flavour, tastes like horrible sausages |
| Tesco’s | 37p | 4.3 | Satisfactory, has potential |
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