Liz Truss is finally gone. After 45 days of tedious turmoil, minister tantrums, and plummeting pounds, there may be some light at the end of the tunnel.
As promised in our In Liz we Truss article, a carefully curated and crafted Liz Truss/ Tory playlist, I (Erin) offered my services for the next Truss event. Well, 12 days later here we are. So, take a seat, grab a drink, and prepare yourself for the immersive Mancunion Spotify experience that is Truss Leavers 2022.
Take That: ‘Never Forget’
“Never forget where you’re coming from / Never pretend that it’s all real / Someday soon this will be someone else’s dream”
Coming in at number one is Take That’s classic ‘Never Forget’. Throughout her leadership campaign, and well into her short and
sweet sour premiership, Liz liked making reference to her Leeds locale and her state school origins. Famously saying she was “the first Prime Minister to ever go to a state school”, Truss was caught in a lie as both Gordon Brown and Theresa May attended comprehensives. Liz Truss certainly took “Never forget where you’re coming from,” to heart.
As we face another leadership election and possibly a general election, “someday soon this [being Prime Minister] will all be someone else’s dream”. We may try, but we will never forget you, Liz.
Dominic Fike: ‘Cancel Me’
“I hope they cancel me (why?) / So I can go be with my family (why?) / So I can quit wearin’ this mask, dog / Tell the people, ‘Kiss my ass’, dog”
As the so-called ‘cancel era’ starts to wind down, we see fewer politicians getting cancelled. Generally, the more gen-X response is demanding a resignation, or like CBBC’s Dick and Dom, calling for a general election.
In the end, Truss cancelled herself, stepping down as PM. She can now go back to her two daughters, head held high, comforted by knowing she’s set women’s rights back by a few years.
Halsey: ‘Easier Than Lying’
“And you make me more and more a villain every day / But you don’t know, you reap, you sow / Whatever you give to me, from yourself, you take / Well, if you’re a hater, then hate the creator / It’s in your image I’m made / Losing you is easier than / Lying to myself that you love me”
Let’s face it, Liz doesn’t really like most of us. We’re not all rich, connected, or privileged. She doesn’t even seem to get on with her own cabinet, with two ministers (Kwasi Kwarteng and Suella Braverman) leaving just days ago. If it wasn’t said in words, then it was said through policies and U-turns.
As a result of this subconscious hate toward the people, the people hate her back, if not 10 times more. Guess that’s what happens when the pound falls, energy rates soar and blackouts loom. Oh dear. I guess losing Liz is easier than her lying.
Sex Pistols: ‘Anarchy in the UK’
Anarchy for the U.K. / It’s coming sometime and maybe / I give a wrong time stop a traffic line / Your future dream is a shopping scheme
The Tories spent the past seven years saying Jeremy Corbyn will take us back to the 1970s just before Truss’ government literally took us back with the latest economic recession and skyrocketing inflation rates. So, in that vein, let’s hop back to a time where a pint of milk cost 8.5p and punk was just getting started. The Sex Pistols‘ ‘Anarchy in the UK’ is the perfect throwback tune for Liz’s big night as the country finds itself in state of Tory-inflicted anarchy.
Throughout her big night Liz might want to take some of Johnny Rotten‘s advice; “Get pissed” [and] “Destroy” the dancefloor as she drowns her sorrows.
My Chemical Romance: ‘Famous Last Words’
“I am not afraid to keep on living / I am not afraid to walk this world alone / Honey, if you stay, I’ll be forgiven / Nothing you can say can stop me going home”
The last words of Liz Truss? “I recognise, though, given the situation, I cannot deliver the mandate on which I was elected by the Conservative Party. I have therefore spoken to His Majesty The King to notify him that I am resigning as leader of the Conservative Party.”
In layman’s terms, “I’m sh*t.”
If anything, it looks great for King Charles III as His Majesty (a liberal royal if ever there was one) was never really a fan of Truss, or the chaos she brought to the UK. The King can now check off his first Prime Minister with pride, before moving on to the next candidate. In the meantime, Truss will be walking the aisles of Waitrose alone, without public scrutiny or Downing Street security.
Paramore: ‘This is Why’
“If you have an opinion / Maybe you should shove it / Or maybe you could scream it / Might be best to keep it / To yourself (to yourself) / To yourself (to yourself) / This is why I don’t leave the house”
At her first, and only party conference, Truss tried to paint herself as a feminist. “It wasn’t the only time in my life that I have been treated differently for being female or for not fitting in. It made me angry, and it made me determined. Determined to change things so it did not happen to others.”
Clearly, this determination never came to fruition, as Truss’ feminism went beyond nothing but words. Her policies have only stripped women of financial security, with her abrupt departure further tarnishing the legacy of female PMs.
Combined with her views of working people as “lazy”, it’s maybe best for Truss to keep her opinions to herself.
James Blunt: ‘Goodbye my Lover’
“Goodbye my lover / Goodbye my friend / You have been the one / You have been the one for me”
This song goes out to all the Tory members heartbroken by Truss’ resignation. Liz has indeed been ‘the one’ for them – or at least tried to be – as her and Kwasi Kwarteng’s mini-budget solely benefitted the less than 1% of the population who voted for her. However, as it’s her leavers drinks, Liz will inevitably be so blackout drunk she may find herself calling up her old Tory affair partner, Mark Field, looking for some late-night love seeming as she’s now finished with the country.
Taylor Swift: ‘It’s Time to Go’
“Sometimes giving up is the strong thing / Sometimes to run is the brave thing / Sometimes walking out is the one thing / That will find you the right thing”
Taylor Swift’s tenth album Midnights is out on October 21. Liz Truss resigned on October 20. Interesting. Maybe it’s just a coincidence, or maybe not…
Gil Scott-Heron: ‘The Revolution will Not be Televised’
“The revolution will not be televised / Will not be televised … / The revolution will be no re-run, brothers / The revolution will be live”
The revolution will not be televised as the Tories are trying to neuter Channel 4 news by way of privatisation and scrap the license fee, putting the BBC at the whims of the commercial sector. However, the winter of discontent is coming; so, instead of being glued to her TV screen, or stuck in stuffy parliamentary meetings, Liz will be able to watch it live in the streets as she starts her early-retirement, wishing for the alternate timeline where a Stockholm syndrome-gripped worshipped her as the second coming of Thatcher.
NSYNC: ‘Bye Bye Bye’
“So now it’s time to leave and make it alone / I know I can’t make more it’s no lie / I wanna see you out that door / Bye, bye, bye, bye”
Our final tune is a perfect song for any leavers drinks. Unlike her predecessor, Boris Johnson, Truss didn’t “start a fight”, but the Conservative Party has said “now it’s time to leave and make it alone / I know that I can’t no more, it ain’t no lie / I wanna see you out that door.
“Bye, bye, bye, bye”, Liz, you won’t be missed.