How to Improve Grades and Alienate People…

The University of Manchester Library, formerly and affectionately known as John Rylands, is a microcosm of Manchester’s student population. One witnesses fellow academics at their best, but mostly at their worst.  The number one activity of JRUL – procrastination – means the outfits of every scholar are scrutinised by those who should be focusing their attention on more ‘important’ tasks. Yet, if we are all aware of this, why have I had to experience numerous fashion offences that are truly detrimental to my studies? I’m not asking for Blue 3 to resemble the front row of Chanel , but is it really that difficult not to wear a bright pink onesie to the library? Those, and crocs, are universally offensive- just don’t. In fact, please refrain from wearing anything that could interrupt an innocent student’s thought process.

I’d forgive every clothes disaster if JRUL made entry dependant on personal hygiene. I have once justified giving up on a days revision due to the stench of overworked and unwashed students. And girls: keep the make-up to a minimum; there’s nothing more frightening than the sight of panda eyes mid essay. We all want to express ourselves, but if that means horrifying others in doing so: save it for the holidays.