Skip to main content

tomgrant
21st February 2023

What your Greggs order says about you

What do you get from Greggs? More specifically, what does it say about you…
Categories:
TLDR

Porridge

I’m sorry but are you a businessperson?

Unless you’re literally running onto the tram at 07:12 with this in your hand, I refuse to listen to another reason as to why you would voluntarily eat this.

It’s not edgy, but I get it can look more professional than having pastry down your tie. 

Sausage Roll

You’re basic. Do you even know what Greggs stands for?

I guess you’re just getting this because you know it’s a safe bet and everyone will think you’re a Greggs connoisseur. You’re not.

Vegan Sausage Roll

I don’t know where to start with this one. I’d still say you’re basic, but I do understand there’s not much else you can eat on the menu.

I’ll let you off, but I want to see you trying the Vegan Sausage, Bean & CheeZe Melt so that your tastebuds can go on holiday.

Chicken Bake

I’m not sure what to make of you. You like Greggs, but you don’t want to stand out in the crowd when you order.

You go for a good bake, a fan favourite if you will, but you haven’t been more adventurous yet. I’ll give you time.

Sausage, Bean & Cheese Melt

You are my favourite kind of person. You just know what’s going on, don’t you?

Pizza Slice

You genuinely make me feel sick. If you’re going to Greggs to just get a pizza slice, then just don’t bother going in.

We all know there’s a Domino’s opposite Greggs on Oxford Road. Please take your sins there and stop filling up the queue of bake lovers.

Roast Chicken Mayonnaise Baguette

Now I’m not saying that you’re as bad as the people who eat the pizza slices, but I’m failing to understand why you’d pick this over a baked good. Maybe you’re trying to have a more established lunch or make it seem as though you’re better than the rest of us.

I’ll accept you buying this if you’re keeping it for later, as we all know you can’t keep a Cheese & Onion bake in your bag all day.

Yum Yum

I like that you like these too.

Greggs’ only original concept of a sweet treat, the Yum Yum is now a staple in many people’s daily Greggs orders.

If you’re ever feeling low whilst in a deep library session, the sugar from a Yum Yum will ensure you’re typing quicker than Dash can run in The Incredibles.

Chocolate Brownies

There are two reasons you may be having these little brownies that are nicely placed in front of the till. It may be because you really like brownies, or because you’re gluten-free.

Unfortunately, this is the only gluten-free option currently on Greggs’ menu, so I will allow you to eat these in peace and shed a tear at the fact you can’t have a steak bake.

Southern Fried Potato Wedges

So, you’re getting onto some of Greggs’ most recent additions, are you?

Introduced a couple of years ago the hot food section is amazing and adding potato wedges onto the side of your Greggs is a great addition, and certainly better than the crisps we ate in the olden days. Pick mayonnaise though, please.


More Coverage

TikTok and Teatox: Why social media is sucking the joy out of food

From ‘What I Eat in a Day’ videos to fad diet trends, social media’s rampant championing of toxic diet culture needs to stop

Margarita Month at Zouk: All style, less substance

Zouk is offering a trio of Margaritas this February to celebrate Margarita Month; yet it seems like all the thought was put into presentation, and less into the drink itself

Flight Club: Margarita Month with a twist

We headed to Flight Club to try their special cocktails in honour of Margarita Month, from Mango Margs to Spicy Picantes

The concept of small plate dining

Tapas, dim sum, chaat, meze, banchan and more!