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Month: February 2012

Editor’s Note Issue 12 13/02/12

Just as we were going to press, news emerged that the Higher Education Funding Council for England (HEFCE), has decided to allocate universities an extra £1,100 per postgraduate student. The funding increase will only affect those postgraduate students not taking the lowest costing and humanities subjects.

Tedious acronyms aside, this is a pretty interesting development and may be a nugget of good news for Manchester’s students. While the marching and banner waving seems to have died down for the moment, the means of funding higher education will be an issue that will never die. It is by far the biggest issue exorcising students (from both sides of the pro/anti fee divide).

This latest development, which we will be covering in more detail in next week’s edition, poses a big question to the University.

Given that they have already decided to raise tuition fees for Postgraduate students for the academic year 2012/13 to £5,000, what will they do with the extra per student funding they will be receiving? Will they lower their fees for the following year or spend the money elsewhere? Watch this space.

The other big story on our radars over the past week has been that of Ed Lester, the chief executive of the Student Loans Company who managed to funnel his salary through a separate company in order avoid paying around £40,00 in tax.

There has been no shortage of views on the issue of legal tax avoidance particularly as practiced by top public officials. Our Comment team have been looking at the ethics of tax avoidance. Turn to Page 8 to see how they got on.

The Mancunion is now an official media partner of this summer’s Parklife festival. This means we’ll be bringing you interviews with all the best acts on the line up and a number of other goodies. Keep an eye out in the next few issues in the run up to the weekend itself.

Lana del Rey and the enduring love for Lolita

This month, Lana del Rey has made her Vogue cover debut, posed girlishly against a backdrop of baby pink. Her debut comes in the midst of backlash following a disastrous Saturday Night Live performance and revelations that Lana del Rey is actually the reincarnation of the less successful Lizzy Grant. Other live performances floating around the internet demonstrate that this performance was an anomalous anxiety-induced failure. As for changing her name, I’m sure nobody expected Lady Gaga, Bono, and Sting to appear as printed on their birth certificates.

In addition to her haunting melancholia, Lana’s rapid rise to fame – considering that Florence Welch first graced the cover of Vogue only two issues previously for December 2011, following three years and two albums in the mainstream music scene, Lana’s alacrity is impressive – has been due to her cultivated, unabashed, and self-confessed “Lolita got lost in the hood” image. The archetypal Lolita image – knowing women depicted as little girls, little girls depicted as knowing women, all in shades of pastel cut with scarlet, a juxtaposition of innocence with sexual self-awareness – is prevalent in Western culture and appeared all over the SS12 catwalks, most prominently at Meadham Kirchoff, who sent down the runway a troupe of candy-coloured Courtney Love-inspired Kinderwhores. Lana’s particular brand of Lolita is notable for its truth to Vladimir Nabokov’s original Lolita – her lyrics, “Light of his life / Fire of his loins”, are a direct re-write of the opening lines of Nabokov’s novel, and both her music and her image are composed of an overt expression of female sexual desire.

While the male obsession with Lolita may seem fairly obvious, it is the equally strong female obsession to be Lolita that initially perplexes. The appeal of Lolita to women lies in the honest exposure of the sexual duality inherent in both young girls and women of all ages, hence the timeless appeal (at 25 years old, Lana is no longer a teenage dream). The Lolita aesthetic embodies an enduring duality of good girl / bad girl: a would-be good girl (crucially, then, an awkward girl) knowingly the object of some malevolent man’s desire, except she desires him just as much. The result is an open acknowledgement that the binary labels of innocent virgin and depraved slut imposed upon women by men could never be adequate descriptions of female sexuality when the veracity is far more complicated.

Consequently, the Lolita aesthetic acknowledges the universal human quality of wanting to appear good in the face of a dark interior; individuals conscious of their mortality who find themselves part of a society with high moral expectations – that’s all of us, then – will forever be attracted to a picture of youth and the prospect of being very, very bad. Morally reprehensible actions are not condoned, but ubiquitous human desire is.

Lana del Rey perfectly embodies the masochism inherent in Lolita, which is why the image endures: masochism, a common and often female desire yet harboured reluctantly by many, is justified through the addition of glamour; it is acceptable if it’s bestowed an intellectual quality and looks beautiful. Who’d have thought a short dress, suntan, heart-shaped sunglasses and punch-stained lips could be so emblematic?

Live: The Black Keys @ Apollo

The Black Keys
Apollo
6th February
5 stars

The unlikely figures of Dan Auerbach and Patrick Carney make up the blues-cum-garage band duo The Black Keys. Hailing from the improbable town of Akron, OH, these two play like they are straight out of the Deep South. They formed around the turn of the millennium creating an admittedly uneasy-listening-style of garage blues and it took the commercial success of Brothers in 2010, to propel the Keys to stardom around the globe. El Camino, the new album from this Ohio duo, has seen the band playing arenas worldwide, a headline slot at Coachella Festival and founded claims of them being the biggest rock band in the world at the moment.

Now, I’m not entirely sure who books support acts for the Black Keys, but that individual got it spot on tonight in the form of Band of Skulls. The trio shot through a powerful blues guitar-driven set that included tracks from their first album. After blasting through latest single ‘The Devil Takes Care of His Own’ to rapturous applaud, the band ended on first album favourite, ‘Light of The Morning’. The South Coast outfit combine fantastic melodies with heavy over-driven guitar riffs to create wonderful three-minute masterpieces.

The stage was set and the mob of leather jacket-wearing rockers erupted into applause when the gangly silhouettes of The Black Keys took to the stage. Storming through openers and Brothers classics ‘Howlin’ for You’ and ‘Next Girl’, this outfit looked like a band in their prime. New tracks ‘Gold on the Ceiling’ and ‘Money Maker’ were fantastically combined with the older, rawer Keys tracks ‘Thickfreakness’ and ‘Girl Is On My Mind’, reminding us of Dan Auerbach’s ability to thrash out Hendrix-style riffs mixed with the wails of Junior Kimborogh. The Black Keys have recently been lauded as one of the biggest rock outfits in the world at the moment; this was demonstrated with a smouldering set and magnificent performance of ‘Lonely Boy’ to round off this unforgettable set.

The Black Keys – Gold on the Ceiling

Album: Beth Jeans Houghton & The Hooves of Destiny – Yours Truly, Cellophane Nose

Beth Jeans Houghton & the Hooves of Destiny
Yours Truly, Cellophane Nose
Mute
5 Stars

For someone with a voice that can be so haunting, Houghton manages to sound warm and comforting throughout the debut album Yours Truly, Cellophane Nose. Listening to it is the audio equivalent of curling up by a warm fire and drifting into a dream infused sleep, full of bizarre but pleasant images.

‘The Barely Skinny Bone’ starts with a lone vocal, which is then replaced by mix of bass guitar and acoustic finger picking that mimic raindrops. The track is reminiscent of The Coral’s dream-like but jaunty tones that should not be labelled as straightforward folk – Houghton is apparently rather unimpressed with the lazy overuse of ‘folk’ as a genre. ‘Veins’, for example, is soulful and bluesy throughout the verses but culminates in what I would describe as an Irish jig.

‘Liliputt’, like so many of the tracks, is outrageously catchy in spite of its unconventional structure; the galloping rhythm builds up throughout the chorus only to be interrupted by Houghton’s piercing, dreamlike vocals before returning to the jaunty beat. The listener is dragged along on a frantic freak show of a journey, barely capable of keeping pace with Houghton’s colourful imagination.

She has perfected the balance of elation and despair that all the best songwriters are masters at; the album is uplifting and optimistic, yet simultaneously holds a strange sense of sadness. It is this ability that makes Beth Jeans Houghton deserving of the buzz that surrounded her in the build up to 2012.

Download: ‘Franklin Benedict’

Beth Jeans Houghton… – Liliputt

Live: Wild Flag

31st January 2012

Sound Control

8/10

The term ‘supergroup’ has really become a bit of a non-sequitur; so often, these bands end up being something far less than the sum of their parts, from the underwhelming (Them Crooked Vultures, The Dead Weather) to the downright disastrous (Jay-Z, Ja Rule and DMX’s proposed collaboration never even got off the ground, which in retrospect was probably for the best). Wild Flag emerged wholly from leftfield last year, with a sublime debut record that achieved the rare feat of making collaborative material from four separately-established musicians sound as natural as anything they ever made on their own.

Comprised of ex-Sleater Kinney members Carrie Brownstein and Janet Weiss, Helium’s Mary Timony and Rebecca Cole of The Minders, tonight’s packed show is a Manchester debut for the band, following a string of rapturously-received southern dates just before Christmas. The considerable live experience held by all four members in their own right belies the group’s short lifespan to date; it’s a dazzlingly polished set, with verve in abundance. Their self-titled debut is aired in its entirety, with fans treated to extended guitar jams during ‘Racehorse’ and ‘Romance’, although the inclusion of new tracks, despite sounding already refined, is inevitably met with less enthusiasm. Brownstein, now moonlighting as a musician with hit sketch show Portlandia, now officially her day job, makes the transition from guitarist to frontwoman with real assurance and a host of impressive stage moves, but the real revelation is co-vocalist Timony, who vocally comes into her own in the live arena. They encore with a cover by ‘a British band you should be proud of’ – the Stones’ ‘Beast of Burden’ – and on tonight’s evidence, Portland, Oregon and Washington, D.C. can hold similar sentiments about Wild Flag.

Wild Flag – Electric Band

Live: Howler @ Deaf Institute

Howler
Deaf Institute
30th January
3 stars

Clichés are clichés for a reason, nevertheless they can be a bit tiresome, and so with some trepidation I shall indulge. Howler, Minneapolis’ very own indie rock outfit, shall entertain the position of our trying-to-please male in this classic ‘first date’ scenario. Despite some high praise, the majority of audience members tonight aren’t all too familiar with their ‘date’, if you like. With their first album America, Give up, hot off the presses, Howler were keen to build on those initial positive signs.

After an intimate set from solo performer Manmade, Howler emerged. With but a few devoted followers, the band’s early attempts to engage fell on slightly flat ears, getting proceedings off to a slightly uneasy start. But fear not, for when they got down to business, they didn’t disappoint. Undistinguishable from the raw, visceral sounds heard on album, Howler manage to charm with memorable melodies, broken strings and intimate insights into their own personal relationships. Safe to say, by the half way point the likes of ‘Beach Sluts’ and ‘Told You Once’ have quashed any early doubts.

With an obvious shortage of material, the night’s performance was brief, but sufficient. Drawing comparisons from several bands, like The Strokes, Jesus and Mary Chain etc., there’s no danger of total rejection. Whether Howler shows enough of their own personality and flare to become that special one, the jury is still out. Assured, energetic, genuine, all the right things. Fancy meeting up again? Yeah, I’d say so.

Howler – Back of Your Neck (live)

Advances in drug testing for 2012

London 2012 looks to be the riskiest games yet for athletes looking to use any kind of illegal performance enhancement. Recent developments in science mean that blood doping, an illegal method of enhancing performance that scientists have always struggled to spot, may soon be detectable. Blood doping, or autologous blood transfusion is a process whereby the athlete removes and stores their own blood, before injecting it back into themselves. The blood is stored for a long enough period of time to allow the athletes body to replace the lost cells. Therefore, when the stored blood is injected back into the body, it gives a boost of red blood cells, and therefore a boost of oxygen.

Prof David Cowan, director of The Blood Control Centre at King’s College London which will run the Olympic drug testing program, explained the developments which now allow scientists to be able to detect old blood in new, “A few years ago, scientists discovered there are processes going on in red bloodcells [as they age outside the body]. We’ve been looking at the different RNA that’s present and been able to identify those that are clearly changed in stored blood.” RNA has a similar structure to DNA but serves a different purpose in the body.

However, despite these developments, the test for blood doping may not be ready for use by 2012. Tests must reach a level of incredibly high accuracy before they are able to be implemented at the games, because of the detrimental effect of falsely accusing an athlete of cheating. In 1999 a large sweep of athletes tested positive for the drug nandrolone, which mimics the effects of testosterone in the body. The athletes were so adamant they hadn’t used anything that The International Olympic Commission held an investigation, and it was found that compounds similar to nandrolone were present in a variety of dietary supplements. If taken, these supplements then caused nandrolone to form naturally in the athlete’s body. Therefore another test in development for 2012 is a test to determine if nandrolone present in a positive sample is due to natural metabolic processes in the body or illegal supplements.

More tests than ever before will be carried out at London 2012, with 50% of athletes being tested and 6,250 samples being taken. Samples will also be stored for 8 years so that if necessary they can be tested with more advanced technology in the future.

Palestinian Lost Ambitions

At 28 years old, Amjad Sofan feels he has missed the train of education and, at this point in his life, will not be able to catch it again.

Amjad is the second oldest son of the Sofan family, one of the families most terrorized by Israeli settler violence in the West Bank. The Sofan family lives in a farm house on an isolated hill far from the rest of the houses in their village of Burin, and earns their living from agriculture. Despite the beautiful landscape that surrounds them, Amjad and his family have never lived in peace as the settlers from the illegal Israeli settlement of Yitzhar, which sits just a few dozen meters from the family home at the top of the hill, frequently harass them and have launched a series of violent attacks on them over the years.

The settlers of Yitzhar, which was first established in 1982, the same year that Amjad was born, are some of the most violent settlers and have attacked Burin and the surrounding villages over the years damaging buildings, cutting olive trees and injuring villagers.  In the midst of unending harassment, Amjad finds the burdens of the family laid on him with no help from the Palestinian police or the Israeli Army.

In July 2002 while Amjad was a second year student at An-Najah University in Nablus, Israeli settlers came down to the Sofan home and set it on fire.  Amjad was not present at the time of the attack because although the university is only fifteen minutes away from Burin, Amjad had had to take a dorm in Nablus.  During that time, the road between Nablus and Burin was effectively closed by an Israeli military checkpoint and travelling between Nablus and the surrounding villages meant dangerous hours-long treks over mountains.

The attack on the family home was so terrifying and traumatic, Amjad’s father suffered a heart attack and died days later. Being the only source of income and the backbone of the family, his father’s death meant that Amjad had to step in to take care of his family at that difficult time. He dropped out of school as he couldn’t afford the tuition and started working on the family’s farm. He has stayed with his family since then because he is the only man in the house and the only one who could offer protection for his mother and younger siblings in case of a sudden attack.

Since 2002, settler attacks have only intensified.  In 2004 settlers set their home on fire yet again and then surrounded the house, armed with dogs and knives.  In addition to the terrifying attacks on their home, which is now ringed with barbed wire to protect against settlers trying to enter the home, even the olive trees the Sofan family raises on their private land and from which they make their living from have been the object of attacks.   Settlers have chopped many of them down and burned others, and due to the risk of violence the family faces by getting too close to the settlement, the settlers prevent the Sofans from picking the olives to earn their living. The family needs permission from the Israeli forces to reach their trees and pick them under army’s supervision.

Amjad thought at first that he would only have to work for a short time to support his family, and then return to his education. He tried doing so in 2005 but dropped a year later due to bad grades and financial problems. He found it hard and not worth it to return to school as his family relied on his financial support and couldn’t afford university even as a future investment. Now he does not think of going back to school as he sees himself as being too old and has more responsibilities than ever before. He can barely manage earning income for himself and his family in the first place, with the ever increasing pressure on the village from Israeli forces and settlers that restrict the job opportunities for the villagers with problems of transportation around the West Bank and attacks that prevent them from tending their land.

Amjad has lost his right to enjoy an education that would have offered him better opportunities in life and allowed him to follow his ambitions. He finds himself now struggling to make ends meet and while he remains steadfast in his commitment to not abandon the family land, he has lost the hope of ever truly enjoying his right to education.

As Palestinians Take the High Road…

There is a story and a long road that every student in Palestine goes through to reach university.

This challenge is not only academic. Of course, students have to work hard in high school in order to be accepted and then double their efforts in the university as all students in the world must do, but this is only one part of the challenge.

In Palestine, the situation is different because of the Israeli occupation.

First, merely getting to school every morning can be a major challenge for Palestinian students, especially if they come from areas far from university.

Movement between cities and villages in Palestine is not a free and guaranteed right.  Any traveler may be stopped by Israeli mobile checkpoints for ID and vehicle inspections. This alone can wreak havoc for students who have fixed class and exam schedules. Not knowing what time they will make it to their classes is a daily concern that they are forced to deal with. During the second Intifada, students had to stop at checkpoints for long periods of time and had to deal with delays daily. Although the situation has calmed down now, there is always a chance that a checkpoint could be reestablished at any time. Keeping this in mind, students still leave for university very early to avoid surprises. My university is 25 minutes away my home, but I still leave at least an hour before my first class to make sure I get there on time.

Even worse, making it to the university is not guaranteed as those checkpoints might block off the roads for hours or even days. When there is a completely closure, the only option for students is to go back home.  However, sometimes returning home is not even an option as Israeli soldiers at checkpoints regularly take students’ IDs, keep them waiting for an indefinite time, and then in most cases release them hours later without any explanation for the detention.

As a result, missed classes and exams and repetition of semesters because of involuntary absences are a part of Palestinian university students’ lives.

“How hard was it for you to get to school today?” is often the first question that is asked as we meet for a morning coffee.  On the days that Israel imposes particularly extreme levels of security, stories of our journey to school take up the lion’s share of conversation all day long.

The rest of our conversations move away from transportation but not from Israel’s effect on our lives. As all university students, we talk about job opportunities, and dream about the successful careers we wish to lead. However, we are always aware that our in many ways our future is not in our own hands.

Although the rest of the world is also suffering from unemployment, in the occupied Palestinian territories the problem is a direct result of the occupation. Many farmers have lost their sources of income due to ongoing Israeli confiscation of Palestinian land, while many others who worked in Israel have lost their jobs or are threatened with losing them because they are Palestinian ID holders.  Even initiatives to boost the Palestinian economy through new industrial enterprises are tightly constrained as Israel effectively controls all Palestinian internal transportation routes, zoning permits, land and sea borders, and access to natural resources.

Graduates find that they cannot live up to their maximum potential, develop their skills or fulfill their ambitions working inside the Palestinian Territories because of the lack of employment opportunities.  Often their only option is to leave their homes and families and work abroad for better opportunities.  Yet even this unfortunate choice is only available to those lucky enough to get a work visa and pass strict Israeli and foreign security measures. As a result, the would-be community leaders, top graduates and advanced degree holders, on whom people are pinning their hopes to develop Palestine, are instead found serving abroad where they can do little for their homeland.

Similarly, the development of Palestinian universities is constrained by the “brain drain” of top Palestinian academics as well as financial deficits. Graduate degree programs are limited, with very small number of faculties to choose from, and even these departments often do not live up to students’ professional and academic needs.

With this daily stressful journey back and forth between home and university and dim prospects for professional opportunities after graduation, the motivation to go to university is decreasing as students know that the certificates that they aspire to hold may mean nothing at the end.  And yet, we remain determined.

English philosopher Herbert Spencer once said, “The great aim of education is not knowledge but action.”  As Palestinian students, we put this principle into practice by the mere act of stepping out of our house every day.

Professor Dame Nancy Rothwell to advise Prime Minister on science and technology

President and Vice-Chancellor of The University of Manchester, Dame Nancy Rothwell has been appointed as the Co-Chair of the Council for Science and Technology (CST) by the Prime Minister David Cameron.

The Council advises the Prime Minister on strategic science and technology policy issues that affect the responsibilities of individual government departments.

Dame Nancy, a neuroscientist and President of the Society of Biology, was appointed as a member of the CST in June 2011.

The Prime Minister said: “Nancy Rothwell’s understanding of science and its relationship to business will enhance the council’s high caliber expertise and ensure that science and technology continues to drive UK growth.

Professor Rothwell said: “I am honoured to be invited to take up this important position and look forward to working with the CST.”

The council reports directly to the Prime Minister, taking into account the cultural, economic, environmental, ethical and social contexts of developments in science, engineering, technology and mathematics.

They hope to ensure that the practice and perception of science, engineering and technology remains an integral part of the culture of the UK.

Other members of the CST include the Deputy Vice-Chancellor of Cambridge University, the Director of Engineering and Technology at Rolls Royce and the CEO of Autonomy Corporation plc.

Her appointment follows the retirement of the previous Co-Chair from the CST, Professor Dame Janet Finch on the 31st December 2011.

Her period of appointment begins on the 13th February 2012 until the 31st December 2013.

Pizza and pussy day

On the 14th of March, the men of the world unbutton their jeans in order to accommodate both the manliest of meals, and the most macho of sexual favours. 

Ladies and gentlemen, I’m talking about Steak & BJ Day, the masculine answer to the decidedly feminine Valentine’s Day.  At least, according to the multitude of websites dedicated to the promotion of this unorthodox holiday, that’s what it’s about.

One website explains; February the 14th is the one day a year men “get the chance” to shower the lady in their life with “gifts, flowers, dinner, shows and any other baubles that women find romantic”.  

Ergo Steak & BJ Day, they declare, is simply a logical and formulaic way for women to return the favour.

The use of the word “bauble” to describe the sort of gifts women supposedly crave is pretty spot-on.  Upon Googling a more exact definition of it, these were the primary results:

1.       A small, showy trinket or decoration.

2.       Something of no importance or worth

That sounds about right.  I don’t know about the rest of the female population, but I don’t want a bloody velour-coated cushion.  I don’t want a wonky-eyed teddy bear.  In fact, veto anything with any kind of man-made stuffing. I don’t want a kilo of Thornton’s most obscure chocolates.  I certainly don’t want a CD of ‘The Greatest Love Songs Ever Sung’.  

No, what I would much rather have is something far less tangible, far less squeezable.  I’d like something sweet to eat, and an even sweeter orgasm, preferably where I don’t do any of the work.  

Romance doesn’t have to be a gift shop favour;  being able to pick your partner’s preferred pizza topping and showing her you know exactly which spot to hit in the bedroom is, in my opinion, a much, much better way to demonstrate your dedication.

Top 5: Alternative Valentine’s gifts

1. Lovehoney Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator 

– a treat for the single girl

 

2. Fleshlight

– a treat for the single guy

3. Semenex

– nutritious, delicious and 100% vegetarian (Google it)

 

4. Durex Play Pina Colada lube

– if you like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain then you’ll lap this one up

 

5. Baby oil

– get back to basics and use your imagination…

V-Day

This year I will be spending Valentine’s Day with the perfect man, Jake. He is gorgeous, intelligent, well dressed, caring and funny. Unfortunately, he also happens to be gay.

The two of us have always wished that our lives would play out like films, with handsome Mr. Darcy types waiting to sweep us off our feet.

Sadly, during the past couple of weeks our lives have played out more like episodes of Eastenders – or, even worse – Jeremy Kyle.

Picture this: you return home to find your best friend on the floor, rocking himself in the foetal position.

When asked what on earth the matter is, he replies: ‘My boyfriend is a porn star’. This, I promise you, did actually happen. I still can’t quite believe it myself.

Jake had accidentally stumbled across the guy he had been seeing in a few, shall we say, compromising positions online. I know, what are the chances? The employee of a corporate company by day, an actor of the X rated variety by night. I kid you not.

Not long afterwards, I found out that the ‘lovely’ guy I had been seeing had also been with one of my friends. Yes, at the same time. Despite this, I absolutely refuse to spend February 14th recreating the ‘All by myself’ scene from Bridget Jones.

Although this may be hard to believe, there is no law in place which states that us singletons must sit in and cry ourselves to sleep on the ‘dreaded’ day. So, invite your mates over, grab a bottle of wine, order a pizza and put a film on. In Finland it is called Ystävänpäivä, which actually means ‘Friend’s day’.

This is what I intend to keep in mind when I end the night spooning the only man for me, my soul mate, my one true love – my gay best friend.

RAG scores touchdown with Superbowl night success

The New York Giants took the Superbowl last week with 21 points against The New England Patriot’s 17 in adrenaline filled four hours that saw RAG fundraisers emerging as the real winners.

The Union Bar, south campus, was packed with 180 sports fans and raised a total profit of £500 for the RAG Community Fund.

The night, stretching from 10pm to 4am was a great success and clearly tapped into an American Football fan base within the Manchester student community that is yet to reach its full potential. Buckets of chicken wings and bowls of curly fries flowed from the Union kitchen and a quick sweep of the room showed passionate revellers mixed with the odd Green Bay Packers jersey, perhaps not realising their team hadn’t made it.

For those die-hards who made past the first half on a Sunday night, an extra treat was thrown in. Madonna performing a mash up of her own songs, accompanied by Cee Lo Green and the now infamous offensive gesture thrown to cameras by M.I.A.

The money raised for the RAG community fund will go towards a collection of community-based charities in Manchester who applied to RAG for funding last year. It also brings RAG closer to this year’s fundraising target of £500,000.

RAG are following up the Superbowl with a series of events as part of RAG week, starting today, including an ice rink and Rocky Horror night. More details of these events can be found at manchesterrag.com

Anti Valentine’s

Contrary to the belief that February 14th is highlighted with a sickly-sweet pink in every coupled-up girl’s calendar, Valentine’s Day has become one that I dread.

Single girls all over the world may be envious of the fact that I have a boyfriend to buy me flowers or take me out for a candlelit dinner, however for me, it has become a time of panic and stress, the last few pennies of my student loan frivolously wasted on something he’ll never use.

They forget that this age of male and female equality has one major setback- girls are expected to buy presents for the boys. Not only does this mean big spending, but having to be original with gift ideas.

I have recently discovered that unlike me and many other girls, whose desire for perfume, makeup, clothes is endless; the other sex have far fewer material needs. And with Christmas just gone and his birthday round the corner, there are only so many t-shirts and socks a boy can fit in his wardrobe.

It’s hard to be creative on a student budget- I’ve baked cakes, made cards, even gone as far as buying him fifty packets of his favourite crisps in a stocking for Christmas. My creative juices have been stretched to their limits.

So this year, while were splitting the bill on our pizza express half-price voucher, to my shame, I’ll probably be handing him some type of last minute paper mache creation.

Valentine’s Day has couples all over the world digging deep into their pockets, and having sleepless nights over new ways of being romantic.

To me, it seems like the perfect day to be single, as your money and time can be spent on a night out with friends, rather than yet another ‘I love you’ teddy bear.

Valentine’s Day: A life long dream

Ever since I was little I would watch my mum prepare for Valentine’s Day. She would apply her make up meticulously and ornament her best dress with jewellery. Then, with a splash of her favourite perfume, out she went with my dad for dinner, leaving me with romantic thoughts for my future and a younger brother throwing toys at my head.

As I grew up I was bombarded with images of love struck couples on this divisive day. My single friends scowled at these couples, but I was jealous and in awe.

For them, Valentine’s was a commercialised, inconvenient and pointless holiday. For me it was a day to remind people that you love them. Year by year I eagerly awaited the Valentine’s Day when I would be part of one of those sickeningly soppy couples.

Finally, this year I have managed to keep a boyfriend long enough to reach February 14th. I should be fulfilling a life long dream.

At exactly this moment, I should be planning a romantic meal, picking out a new dress and writing down a sentimental message on a cute card.

However, this year, I will be in Manchester, and my boyfriend will be in Ireland, where I am from. Separated by almost two hundred miles and a poverty-stricken student status, we are unable to celebrate Valentine’s in the way I always imagined.

Instead, I will spend it stuffing my face with cheap heart-shaped chocolates which I bought for myself. At the same time my ‘anti-Valentine’ friends will be gazing starry eyed across a table in a posh restaurant at their boyfriends.

With this thought in mind, I will most likely spend the early hours of the morning on the phone to mine, whinging about how I have been denied a childhood ambition.

This will be followed by more chocolate and glaring jealously at whatever rom-com I decide to watch, in an attempt to live out my romantic expectations through the nauseatingly loved up couples on my television screen, with the hope that next year I will be one of them.

Review: The Elizabethans by A.N.Wilson. 4 stars

After great success with The Victorians, Wilson attempts to capture the spirit of the Elizabethan era in this single-volume work, aptly titled The Elizabethans. As a History student, I have come to be extremely wary of condensed historical narratives but Wilson’s new survey of the period proved to be an interesting and entertaining read. Wilson ultimately wants to convey the parallels between modern British society and the Elizabethans, and that this was the era that laid the foundations for later British power and prosperity, such as English sea-power.

By acknowledging these links and deep rooted connections between past and present, Wilson tackles the danger of being too dismissive and judgemental of past societies, and in turn, so does the reader. Wilson also glorifies the cultural brilliance of the Elizabethan age with great and infectious enthusiasm, discussing not just the burgeoning amount of exceptional literature and drama, but also music and the magnificent architecture produced in the era that survives in the form of great manor houses, schools, gatehouses and staircases.

As expected from a popular history book that squeezes so much into one volume, I did find myself wincing slightly at some of the sweeping generalisations, but that is probably just the little history lecturer at the back of my mind talking.

An easily digestible overview of the period that offers some interesting new perspectives.

Review: The Doll Princess – Tom Benn. 3.5 stars

The blurb of The Doll Princess proclaims author Tom Benn as ‘an assured and exhilarating new voice in literary crime fiction’. However, classifying this novel as ‘literary’ works massively to its detriment and sets any prospective readers off on the wrong foot.

Take its protagonist, Henry Bane, whose hard-bitten narration calls to mind a Mancunion Sam Spade; all local slang and casual sexism. Henry Bane, or just ‘Bane’ as he prefers to go by, is not a literary figure – he’s a typical noir protagonist imprinted onto a Manchester setting, complete with a tough, mercenary exterior that hides a weakness for the damsel in distress. It’s this chivalry that serves as his prime motivation throughout the novel; the drive to avenge the murder of his childhood sweetheart.

The depiction of said damsels (and women in general) is certainly not literary. Women run the gamut from disposable sex objects, to monstrous femme fatales to abject victims, all adopting one of the noir genre’s less than flattering female archetypes. The Doll Princess is a masculine milieu and while female agency is certainly touched upon, it serves largely as a handy moral barometer to show the scheming femme fatale’s ambition and desire in contrast with the naivety and powerlessness of the sweet, dumb girls in need of saving.

That’s not to say that The Doll Princess is a bad novel, it’s not, it’s a great crime novel, but it’s not a literary crime novel and anyone expecting a literary approach to the genre is going to be disappointed. The Doll Princess is a traditional noir and thus it liberally utilises the tropes of the genre. This acts as a handy anchor for less experienced readers and intersperses the often unrelentingly grim and violent plot with a little more colour.

The plot itself is pretty dense and can get a little convoluted but the somewhat hit-and-miss prose generally manages to ‘hit’ when the story needs to move on; the pace is brisk and the action well written and visceral.

The novel really comes into its stride around halfway through when the somewhat awkward realism makes way for a cartoonish foray into violence and international intrigue and Henry Bane, like any good noir hard man, finds himself massively in over his head but soldiers on nonetheless.
The Doll Princess is a great read for fans of the genre; it’s pacey, violent and doesn’t take itself too seriously, so neither should you.

Joy Division by Kevin Cummins

His look is both determined and dreamy. You may recognise Ian Curtis, and if I say Love Will Tear Us Apart, you will probably think of Joy Division, the legendary band from Manchester who emerged at the very end of the ‘70s.

NME photographer Kevin Cummins had the chance to work with Ian Curtis and his band from their beginning. You can see about thirty of his black and white pictures at the Manchester Photographic Gallery. Most of them were taken at Factory during concerts, as well as in rehearsal rooms or around Manchester.

One of the most famous locations used by the band to be photographed is the Epping Walk Bridge over Princess Parkway in Hulme – now commonly called the ‘Joy Division bridge’. It was here that Kevin Cummins took a series of iconic photographs, not knowing that we’d still be talking about Joy Division 30 years later.

At the start of their journey, Joy Division were developing as a band and they struggled to find a way to act in front of the camera and Kevin Cummins had no preconception of how to encourage them to be natural. Just like the atmosphere of their sombre music, he managed to express a kind of seriousness, melancholy and at the same time determination of the band, especially through Ian Curtis’ portraits.

Kevin Cummins worked in Manchester as a photographer for the Royal Exchange Theatre and other theatres across the UK, like The Royal Opera House, The Royal Northern Ballet and The Oxford Playhouse. He also contributed to The Times, The Guardian, The Observer, Elle and Vogue. He recently obtained the Pride of Manchester award for best book of the year for Looking for The Light Through the Pouring Rain in 2010.

Kevin Cummins’ Joy Division Exhibition

Manchester Photographic Gallery , 6 Tariff Street, Manchester M1 2FF (Northern Quarter) Exhibition extended to February 23rd

Review: Murder Most Foul: Hamlet Through the Ages – David Bevington

Bevington’s latest book seeks to trace the history of Shakespeare’s Hamlet from its roots in Scandinavian epic lore, right the way up to present day postmodernist readings. The book uses a chronological structure to approach this mine of information, splitting the centuries into 7 chapters of around 30 pages each (so if, say, you’ve got an essay which desperately requires 18th century criticism of Hamlet, you can skip the Elizabethan, Restoration, Victorian, modern and postmodern readings).

All the book’s chapters follow the same basic structure. First, there is an introduction to each historical epoch, detailing the hard facts about stage production, textual revisions, and contemporary reactions. These are mixed in with some more offbeat details (did you know that Shakespeare himself played the ghost of Hamlet’s father? Or that he was actually ridiculed in his time for his lack of classical education?). The facts are then followed by a discussion of each period’s political and ideological readings, before Bevington ties off the chapter with a short summary, tying all the information he has just bombarded you with into neat, tidy, digestible package.

But while the range of information on display is dazzling in itself, what is particularly impressive about Murder Most Foul is the ease with which Bevington guides his reader through relatively complex ideas. You would not need an academic background to understand anything in this book, and yet the text deals with Freud, post-modernism, and other lesser known but no less complex theories. Part of the key to the book’s clarity is its heavy use of quotation, both from Hamlet and the secondary texts. Bevington is an expert at unpacking these quotes, and is able to couch them in everyday language that does not oversimplify, but succeeds in making them accessible to the general reader. As an aside, there’s also the odd picture which really helps to bring to life everything he talks about.

The only criticisms I have are that sometimes the facts are discussed for too long (do you need fifteen pages of comparison between Shakespeare’s Hamlet and the original Norse saga?) and that Hamlet’s plot is reiterated too many times (though this may be to accommodate readers who only dip into chapters they are particularly interested in).

Overall, Murder Most Foul would serve as an excellent introduction not only to Hamlet, but also to the wider context of Shakespeare’s work and the ongoing history of critical theories surrounding it.