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Month: March 2016

Review: The Forest

Written by Joe Hunt on . Posted in Film.

The Forest built what could be an interesting premise, something which we rarely see these days in horror films—unfortunately, it chooses to take this interesting premise of a gentle woodland stroll and then leaves it there to die.

When Sarah (Natalie Dormer) goes in search for her twin sister Jess (also played by Natalie Dormer) who disappeared from her teaching job in Japan, many fear the worst as she was last seen walking into Aokigahara, a real place in Japan that is also known as the suicide forest. Based on a genuinely haunting place, this film had the potential to create something truly unnerving—and also possibly quite beautiful, but it instead relies on tired old tropes which it adheres to without much enthusiasm or success.

It seems like quite an easily workable premise: being lost in the woods alone, surrounded by the hanging bodies of tortured souls. This is something which should at least be a little scary, but somehow it isn’t. And that’s the main issue with this film, it simply isn’t scary at all. In fact, it’s quite boring. There is no sense of suspense throughout the film, with only a few jump scares offered as what we’ve come to accept as the traditional substitute for any substance in most modern day horrors; however, in the advent of snapchat filters, even these have lost any bite they once had.

To her credit, Natalie Dormer does her best in this film. She gives a genuinely believable performance, and somehow manages to whittle two characters out of a film that honestly, barely gives her enough material for one. In fact, this is another premise that the film could have worked better with—you barely see the twin sister Jess at any point in this movie, which is a shame because as I say, it seems that Natalie Dormer could really pull off the dual role. It’s not exactly Jeremy Irons in Dead Ringers, they chose to dress one twin like an Amanda Seyfried character and the other as Wednesday Adams in order to distinguish them apart, but it was an aspect of the film that I enjoyed watching.

You can’t say the same for Dormer’s co-star Nick Antosca who plays Aiden, a fellow American who acts as Sarah’s companion through the forest and does absolutely nothing in this role; answering the age old question: “if a character gets lost in a forest and there’s no audience to care what happens to them, will it make an impact in any way at all?” to which the answer is apparently no. The rest of the characters in this film consist almost solely of Japanese stereotypes (sushi chefs, school girls and so forth).

The whole film is just a disappointment. Mainly because it contained elements which could have made a good horror film, which recently, the film industry has been lacking; with a few exceptions in the last few years. A good actor, an interesting setting and the directing do not seem too bad. If you excuse the occasional moment where the camera pans around the character whilst they desperately search for something or someone, then the film isn’t too bad look-wise. But while it appears to be trying to enlist the art of spectral Japanese horror, it falls back on lacklustre and formulaic American horror. The makers of this film were messing with forces they clearly did not understand.

In short the film’s tagline to not “stray from the path” does not ring true at all. In fact, if you were to ever visit Aokigahara forest, I would recommend going off the path; the surrounding area looks like a beautiful and relaxing space. The scariest thing that’s going to happen is someone stumbling into your tent while you’re asleep. But don’t worry, after that, nothing really happens.

2/5

Classic Review: Pather Panchali

Written by Mritunjay Sharma on . Posted in Film.

It’s like taking a tour of an art gallery and then getting mesmerised by the brilliant paintings, and when the tour ends, you can’t decide which painting you liked the most, leading you back to the first room to take the tour again.

On a first viewing, Pather Panchali can be seen as a film which sells poverty to the west, but on a deeper level, it is just a simple story of an extended family. It’s a story of aspirations and hopes of different characters, whether it be the father, Harihar who works as a priest but wants to be a playwright or a poet and earn a decent income to provide comfort to the family; the mother, Sarabjaya who wants Harihar to make some money so that the neighbours stop taunting her and the family, so that one day, she can walk in the village with her head held high; the old lady, Indir, who tries hard to be a part of the family despite living in the same place and wanting to hear something good from Sarabjaya; the kids Durga and Apu, who want to follow the sound of the train they hear every evening and see what it looks like—though both children keep teasing each other all the time. Yet, they still want to enjoy the simplest things of life together—be it the chutney that Durga makes, sharing the fruits that Durga steal from the neighbour’s place, running wildly in the fields, following the sweet vendor, or theatrical performance.

Moreover, in this film, we can also see three different generations of women portraying three different ways of life. Durga the child is fearless, she is a free spirit, and she is not bothered about anyone. Though she is loved by her parents, she is treated inferior to Apu, but then her love for Apu never diminishes which is evident throughout the film as she is protective over him.

Sarabjaya, the mother is worried not just about the state of the family but also the way neighbours and the others in the village treat them because of their financial situation. She tries to live with some dignity and she feels aghast when Durga is accused of stealing as it impacts her pride. Indir, the old lady lives alone but she is still self-sufficient and self-respecting and she shows that when she is taunted by Sarabjaya, she leaves the house and takes refuge at another relative’s house. She leaves the house permanently to show Sarabjaya that she is not going to take the tantrums.

The film also takes on the different kinds of death, the death of the old lady which only impacts Durga because of her closeness, and then the death of Durga which affects the whole family—including Apu, which can be seen in the end when Apu drinks the milk himself and combs his hair himself. This death leads the family to migrate to a distant place in the end.

The beauty of this film is enhanced by the beautiful shots of the countryside, along with the unstoppable nature that takes place around the village. These shots are complemented by the sitar music played by Ravi Shankar. A lot of people can say that the film is slow, which is true, but that is how life takes place in a village. And at the end of the day, it is the portrayal of life which director Satyajit Ray tried to mimic, and he succeeded.

HOME Pick of the Week: King Jack

Written by Jake Sanders on . Posted in Film.

King Jack—the story of a bullied delinquent learning some big life lessons after his young cousin comes to visit—is a solid addition to the coming-of-age genre, but it isn’t exactly groundbreaking. At its best, King Jack recalls the work of David Gordon Green (excluding his forays into stoner comedies), with naturalistic dialogue and dreamy cinematography that work together to ground viewers in the summertime melancholy of its protagonist’s headspace. It’s difficult to talk about King Jack without referring to other film directors because Felix Thompson (making his feature debut) wears his influences entirely on his sleeve. Besides Gordon-Green, anyone familiar with the work of Jeff Nichols—or even our very own Shane Meadows—will find King Jack to be more than a little derivative.

But derivative does not always mean bad, and King Jack is ultimately, a very charming—if slight—film. This is largely due to the fantastic leading performance from Charlie Plummer, whose depiction of adolescent malaise is note-perfect, with exactly the right blend of insecurity, vulnerability and awkwardness that only ever seems false when the script lets him down.

The script is the film’s weakness; tending to veer off into clichés and jarring tonal shifts. Its early scenes are the strongest, they focus on how Jack deals with the humiliation and cruelty of his everyday life. A third act decision to examine the cyclical nature of violence and bullying has the potential to be interesting, and the intensity of the brutality is appropriately difficult to watch. But it unfortunately lacks the gut-wrenching and emotional impact of a film like This Is England, because any sense of character development is only given to Jack’s tormentor, too late into the film.

It would be easy to criticise King Jack for being naïve in its presentation of poverty—or for not fully exploring some of the darker themes at its centre, but optimism is an important for coming-of-age stories. Though the film is checkered with troubling moments, it’s clear that Thompson is more interested in examining the healing powers of companionship and the importance of responsibility than forcing the audience to endure 90 minutes of unrelenting emotional distress.

Though King Jack is undoubtedly a flawed film, audiences should find plenty to enjoy in its sincere and tender approach to familiar subject matter. Thompson’s decision to draw so heavily from the canon of small town dramas could be read as a lack of confidence from a first-time director, but there’s enough good stuff in King Jack that a second film from the director could be something worth anticipating.

3/5

Albert’s Schloss

Written by Felix Sanders on . Posted in Food & Drink.

The Schloss is opposite the Great Northern Warehouse on Peter Street, in what can be referred to as downtown Manchester. I’d seen the place, at a distance, a couple of times and watched crowds of people outside, doormen with Kangol-esque hats dipped over one eye, young professionals with jawlines in blue suits and dresses toying with notions of modesty. Before I knew anything about the place, I felt drawn to it.

When you talk about places to go out at night, to eat or drink, certain adjectives specific to the nature of the outing crop up. You hear ‘studenty’ a lot, as in, “it’s pretty good, quite cheap, really studenty”. The ‘after-work’ descriptive is how I would begin to talk about Albert’s Schloss.

I very rarely think about what to wear when I go to review a place however in this circumstance, I specifically chose a shirt; a nice shirt, white, second-hand Paul Smith. I don’t know why I felt the need to conform to the idea I had of the kind of clientèle the Schloss entertains, I just knew I wanted to arrive in a shirt.

The way diners interact with the greeters and maître d’hôtels is fascinating. You know you’re judged and classified the moment they set eyes on you. The shirt in question pulled a wonderful wool over the eyes of the woman who showed us to our table. There was something egotistically comforting about feeling that, because a single item of clothing, I belonged in the sleek yet gemütlich atmosphere of the two million-pound brainchild of what has been humbly dubbed Mission Mars Ltd.

Mission Mars Ltd. is a combination of two restaurant/bar groups. One half being the owners of Trof, The Deaf Institute, Gorilla and The Albert Hall. The other, Inventive Leisure plc, the owner and operator of Revolution Vodka.

So these two titans in Mancunian hospitality pooled their resources, with the aid of a £2 million Growth Capital Loan from Santander Corporate & Commercial, and set about transforming a beautiful Grade-II listed building into a beautiful beer hall and cook haus.

My dining companion, a guitarist from the post-punk group ‘Weird Will’, and I were shown to are window table at 7:30 on a Wednesday night. The whole place was full. In a what must be 150-plus seat venue this is saying something.

Our waiter was lovely, and I’m not often overly complimentary of waiters—but this one deserves a special accolade as, towards the later part of our meal he came over with two very golden, very free beers. They had been poured by accident and he was wondering if we wanted them: “You are probably my soundest table,” he shrugged. Win.

The beer game at Albert’s Schloss is serious. There are eleven umlaut-infested tap beers, from various Czech and German breweries and myriad of different bottled options. We opted for Pilsner Urquell and Dortmunder Vier; at £5.00 and £4.60 respectively, it’s not a cheap pint, but remember that about two of those five pounds goes towards the atmosphere.

As for the food. Don’t go to Albert’s Schloss for the food. If you do find yourself eating there you won’t suffer too badly but still, it’s like Austro-German pub food. The chicken liver paté (£6.50) had the unsettling consistency of whipped cream, but the house baked bread it came with was good. To give credit where it’s due, my house smoked wurst (£5.00) was deliciously moreish but the pickled cabbage it came with had a dust-like impact on my mouth, and the kraut was not a great deal better.

For mains I stayed traditional with a chicken schnitzel (£9.50) which was overwhelmingly average and my partner chose fish frites (£12.00). A sincerely ridiculous name for battered hake with chips. He seemed happy enough though.

Go to Albert’s Schloss. The atmosphere is incredible. I’ve heard great things about their Friday and Saturday nights with live bands, roving saxophonists, and spinning wax. So go, eat before you go, but go nonetheless.

27 Peter St, Manchester M2 5QR
Price £££
Food 2/5
Drinks 5/5
Service 4/5
Atmosphere 5/5
Value 3/5

TV Binge: American Crime Story

Written by Tristan Goldsmid on . Posted in Film.

22 years after O. J. Simpson’s charge with the double murder of his ex-wife Nicole Simpson and friend
Ronald Goldman, FX revives the “trial of the century” in this 10-part recreation with an excellent cast, featuring Cuba Gooding Jr. as O. J. Simpson, and John Travolta and David Schwimmer as Simpson’s
defence lawyers.

Occurring two years before the trial and forming the backdrop to the case, the 1992 Los Angeles riots thrust the issues of police brutality and racism into the spotlight. The rioters took to the streets for six days, immediately after the acquittal of the four police officers from the LAPD who were charged with the violent arrest and beating of Rodney King. Feelings of injustice and mistrust in the police engulfed the African-American community and explains why the opinions were so divided when American football star O. J. Simpson was charged with murder.

This complex backdrop is cleverly woven into the opening episodes of the American Crime Story’s first season, which doesn’t shy away from tackling racism head-on. The programme opens with footage from the riots, the infamous footage of Rodney King’s arrest, and in-backroom scenes where members of Simpson’s defence utilise and manipulate racial tensions by selecting a jury made up of mainly African-Americans. The show handles these issues superbly, and is best evidenced by the conflict within the characters themselves. Simpson, for instance, first refused to play the “race card” by appealing to the African-American community, believing that his celebrity status is enough to convince people of his innocence.

This celebrity status is explored in the second episode, depicting the famous Bronco car chase; which, cleverly cut between real footage and cheering spectators, whilst Simpson is pursued by police. Celebrity culture arguably plays a more prominent role in society today, and thus the portrayal of Simpson’s special treatment in the media raises some intriguing questions about how we treat celebrities. But not all the references to celebrity culture work—the inside jokes and references to the Kardashian name in particular—stemming from Robert Kardashian’s backstory, felt like cheap and unnecessary nods to today’s well-known reality TV stars.

Despite this, American Crime Story is an incredibly clever and exciting recreation, giving a factually based insight into one of the most controversial and dividing trails in history. What makes watching the case as a recreation particularly fascinating is how many of these racial issues such as police treatment of African-Americans remains the same 21 years later. In recent years the number of high profile acts of police misconduct has been increasing. As a result, whether or not you agree with the verdict, the recreation of the O. J. trail gives audiences an opportunity to be reminded of race’s prominence once again in contemporary society, as well as its role in recent history.

Live: Lucy Rose, supporting City and Colour

Written by Paul Norris on . Posted in Music.

Live: Lucy Rose (supporting City and Colour)

20th February 2016

Albert Hall

7/10

Following the release of Lucy Rose’s second album Work it Out last summer, her profile has seen a steady increase with a more refined and energetic sound that perhaps counteracts her diminutive persona. However, therein lays her appeal—distinctively inoffensive yet extremely catchy and relaxed records. What says the most about her increasing popularity is the fact that the Albert Hall was already full for her support set; people were not just hanging around at the bar waiting for Dallas Green.

The set began with a solo performance of ‘Into The Wild’ from the latest album. A charmingly affectionate opener which highlighted her capability to captivate a crowd without a full band. Yet, it was not until the full band joined Rose that the set really got going. The band added an element of dynamism to the sound that can became somewhat repetitive with just an acoustic guitar. The band complemented the gracefulness of the songs and didn’t drown out the relaxed vocal style of Rose. Such could be heard on ‘Middle Of The Bed’ from Rose’s first album, an endearing yet somewhat groovy number that  still sounds good four years after its release. The same could very much be said about ‘Lines’, which, despite being a remarkably peaceful song, still managed a progressive nature and an urge for foot-tapping.

At this point, the set became rather repetitive if not slightly forgettable. This was the biggest obstacle for Rose, her unique chilled out style could become slightly limiting. Yet, the most memorable part of the set soon followed with Dallas Green joining Rose on stage for a rendition of ‘She’ll Move’ and it was hard to not get the impression that Rose couldn’t really believe what was happening. However, the combination with Dallas Green actually highlighted her similarities with the City and Colour star—an endearing and folky nature. In fact, Lucy Rose now sells her own range of tea to accompany her album. Quaint, yet bearing a tendency to pass you by.

Manchester scientists discuss the possibility of alien life

Written by Alina Shrourou on . Posted in News, Science & Tech.

A 60-minute conversation between staff from the University of Manchester—including Dr David Kirby (Centre for the History of Science, Technology and Medicine); Professor Matthew Cobb and Dr Sheena Cruikshank (Faculty of Life Sciences); Professor Danielle George (Engineering); Dr Aravind Vijayaraghavan (Materials); and science fiction writer and physicist Alastair Reynolds—has been uploaded onto YouTube as a 4-part episode discussing the possibility of alien life.

The aim of this discussion was for public engagement of an interesting and speculative subject that science has not yet been able to provide a definitive conclusion for. The videos demonstrate that not one perspective can answer such a question, and thus requires evidence and opinion from a number of expertise. The topics discussed included the practicalities of alien communication and contact, the origin of life, and possible alien life forms.

At the start of the discussion, all experts agreed that simple alien life is possible, but intelligent life form is unlikely. Spoiler: Sadly these opinions don’t change by the end of the discussion, but it’s a fun and interesting watch nonetheless, with good science conversation and some friendly ‘battle-of-the-sciences’ banter.

This is particularly obvious between materials expert Dr Aravind Vijayaraghavan and biologist Professor Matthew Cobb. For example, Dr Vijayaraghavan states, “We don’t understand 90 per cent of the universe and the 10 per cent we think we understand we kind of understand a little bit—so how can we know how aliens would communicate with us? They probably have [found us], they’re probably walking amongst us”, to which Prof. Matthew Cobb replies, “What’s the probability of probably? Probably very tiny.”

Dr Vijayaraghavan then questions Professor Cobb in part 2 of the programme, when Cobb states that, “The joining of two cells that produced our eukaryotic cells only happened once in 3.5 billion years.” Vijayaraghavan responds by asking, “How can you be so sure that it only happened once in one location?”

From mentions of space graffiti to alien taxonomy, the discussion was entertaining, informative, and easy to understand for a general public audience. Dr Sheena Cruickshank, Academic Lead for Public Engagement with Research, commented on her involvement in the show, saying, “I very much enjoyed making this—it was fascinating to research the topic and discuss with scientists from such diverse backgrounds as we all had different views and ideas.”

Professor Matthew Cobb, who led the show, spoke to The Mancunion about the importance of science communication and public engagement efforts like this. He said: “I think that scientists—and academics in general—have a responsibility to explain their work to the general public. Directly or indirectly, the public pay for our work, so they have a right to know.

“Equally importantly, if we care about our subject, if we think it is important or interesting, then surely we should want to explain it to as many people as possible.

“The world is changing in remarkable and alarming ways, and new technology is enabling us to manipulate the natural world with an unprecedented degree of accuracy.” He continues, saying: “I think deciding how to respond to climate change and threats to biodiversity will require us all to be able to understand what is at stake—the potential advantages and the potential risks. In various areas of science we are at the threshold of some astonishing discoveries.

“For example, physicists have realised that they do not know what 85 per cent of the universe is made of, while biologists have been able to reconstruct humanity’s astonishing evolutionary history, making discoveries that that would have been dismissed as science fiction only a decade ago. At these two very different scales, science is about to change how we view our place in the universe, what it is to be human, and indeed the very nature of reality. Everyone should know about this stuff!”

The link to the discussion on YouTube can be found here.

The experts have recorded a second programme answering the question: ‘Will the machines rule the world?’

My Style Diary

Written by Sarah Kilcourse on . Posted in Fashion & Beauty.

University is an environment where there are no rules or limitations about what you wear. We have the opportunity to be as creative or as lazy as we like on a daily basis, so here is a run down of my outfits for the week.

Monday

As an English Literature student, I only have nine contact hours a week (I can hear you groaning). Annoyingly, this year, six of those are consecutive on a Monday, 12pm – 6pm, making Monday the day that I put the most effort into what I wear, because I see the most people—how shallow, I know! This week I went for a polo neck jumper and some patterned trousers, warm and comfortable for cold lecture theatres.

Photo: The Mancunion

Tuesday

My Tuesday starts at 10am and although it’s not horrifically early, it does impact upon how much effort I can be bothered to put in. So, jeans and a jumper it is, keeping it casual. However, I was going to see my boyfriend in the evening, so I didn’t want to be too scruffy.

Photo: The Mancunion

Wednesday

Luckily I have a nice mid-week break on Wednesday, which I spent with my boyfriend visiting some art galleries, meaning I actually made an effort to look nice. I even brought out the lipstick!

Photo: The Mancunion

Thursday

I had a full library day planned, so it was pure comfort, a big loose t-shirt dress, with an even bigger jumper and my comfiest shoes. I find the library can be impossibly cold, so my scarf also doubled up as a blanket.

Photo: The Mancunion

Friday

The majority of my clothes were in the wash and I was absolutely freezing, so a big pink jumper finished off my week. In the evening I went to see Husbands and Sons at the Royal Exchange (which I thoroughly recommend), so I changed into a black jumpsuit/culottes creation.

Photo: The Mancunion

Strobe your way to spring skin

Written by Talia Lee-Skudder on . Posted in Fashion & Beauty.

With spring fast approaching, it’s time to say goodbye to the caked-on face of foundation to conceal winter’s red nose and embrace the dewy, glowy, fresh face to transition into the warmer months. If you found yourself panicking over the lengthy process of achieving a killer contour during the Christmas period then spring just might be the season for you. Thanks to the technique of strobing, the spring makeup regime is faster, with a lighter coverage and luscious luminosity accentuating your features. This look leaves you feeling fresh with a glow that would put Kendall to shame.

So, what is strobing? Strobing is basically just a fancy term for highlighting. Instead of using the thick and heavy cream-based products that are used for highlighting when you contour, with strobing the products are lighter and contain lots of shimmer. The trick of the trade is to only apply the highlighter in the places that catch the light: the cheekbones, the top of your brows, below the brow bone, down the bridge of your nose, the corners of your eyes and finally above the cupid’s bow. Unlike contouring, where you try to desperately locate your seemingly non-existent cheekbones, strobing isn’t about changing the look of your face, it is about enhancing the fabulous facial features you have already. Beware of getting too slap-happy with the highlighter though, because you can run the risk of going from glowy to greasy with a misapplication.

Every skin tone suits a different shade of highlighter. For girls with fair to medium skin, champagne and slightly pink tones are best for achieving the dewy and shimmering look. Whilst for those who have an olive to dark skin tone, golden and terracotta based highlighters will create the look. Benefit cosmetics do a great range of highlighters that suit all different skin tones. High-Beam (£19.50) is a gorgeous pink champagne-toned highlighter, while Sun-Beam (£19.50) is a golden cream-based luminator that is perfect for people with a darker skin tone or for those who are still rocking their summer tan. Another favourite from Benefit is the glitzy, shimmer highlighter stick Watt’s up (£24.50) that is fabulous applied either before or after foundation. For those of you who prefer a powder, then Topshop does two different powders in their range: Chameleon highlighter in Mother of Pearl (£12.50) and Highlighter in Horizon (£10.00). However, the most sought after highlighter product on the market is the Mary-Lou Manizer from The Balm cosmetics. This gorgeous product is priced at £17.50 and will transform your face, leaving you with an enviable fresh-faced glow.

To achieve the ultimate natural spring beauty look, pair your chosen highlighter with a light wear foundation, bronzer, lashings of mascara and a pink-toned lippie. Strobing will reinvigorate your makeup routine and leave you wondering how you ever coped without it. Some lasting advice: embrace your newfound makeup look, go out and shine bright like a diamond.

All that glitters…

Written by Sophie Soar on . Posted in Fashion & Beauty.

… is gold. Another LFW has flown by, with the trends set in place for Autumn/Winter 2016. Designers showcased their finest cuts, colours and materials across the five days; but while thousands of outfits were shown, the buyers, journalists and dedicated followers were interested in one thing: what works, what sells and what the wearer wants.

As a self-confessed magpie, my weakness is glitter, jewels and sparkling sequins. The details mesmerise and designers are no fools to their enchanting quality. Like an entrancing rash across the catwalks, designers from Burberry to Erdem caught the infection.

SIBLING provided an athletic knitwear interpretation, using glitter wool in hooded tops alongside shimmering accessories from earmuffs to helmets. Alternatively, David Koma’s bedazzling was less subtle than that of SIBLING, revealing a netted top with a jewelled chest. This chainmail resemblance further extended into the skirts of dresses, complemented with sheer material; strength and delicacy combined into one.

However, this season, all eyes were on Sarah Burton’s return to London with Alexander McQueen’s dazzling new collection. The show started with flowing dresses that scatter butterflies across the body and hard-edged tailoring styled with body chains. The latter looks developed into sheer material with intricate detailing of jewels sparsely covering the body. The dresses seem barely there, until the shimmer of jewels showcase Burton’s brilliance.

The trend reached overseas, too: Dolce and Gabbana’s grand finale at MFW displayed the label’s elegant decadence as the models sauntered down the catwalk in glittering silver, baby-and hot- pink dresses; the collars brandished the designers’ iconic jewellery, with a gentle netting at the base of the neck.

Undoubtedly, my personal favourite would be Eudon Choi’s silver boots, with striking merlot red suede down the heel counter. Metallic footwear extended across many of the runway shows and as a result has firmly placed their shining foot in the door: this is a trend to stay.

International Alcohol Etiquette: Breaking down the barriers of communication

Written by Aj Mal on . Posted in Lifestyle.

Learning a new language can be time consuming, and communicating with the locals when travelling is often difficult to master. For this reason, we have constructed a brief international guide to the most essential phrases you will need to get served anywhere on the planet!

 

First: How to order a beer.

To enjoy a pint in Germany, ask for “Ein Bier, bitte!” The French request is, “Une bière, s’il vous plait”, whilst Italians stylishly utter “Una birra, per favore!”

In Spanish, “Una cerveza por favor” will get you a beer. However, if you’re up for the challenge, it’s recommended that you take the time to learn some of the many regional adjustments.

For example, in Catalan: “Una cervesa, si us plau!” And in the Basque region of Bilbao and San Sebastián, you will need to ask for a “Garagardo bat, mesedez!”

For a cold one in Sweden, “En öl, tack”. In Prague, “Pivo, Prosim”.

In China, you can only try to pronounce “Ching gay woh ee bay pee joh!”

And for Beers in Brazil and Portugal, try “Uma cerveja, por favor!”

 

To say cheers, running through the following phrases should eventually see you stumble upon the right words:

Poland and Russia:”Nazdrovya”
Sweden: “Skol”
Germany: “Prost”
Spain: “Salud”
Italy: “Salute”
France: “à votre santé”.

 

Whilst commonly known as simply just beer, or similar words such as “Bier” (Germany), “Biere” (France), or “Birra” (Italy), more unusual names include:

“Cerveza” in Spain, but “Garagardoa” in the Basque region. “Cervesa” in Catalonia, and “Cervexa” in Galicia. “Una Pinta” can also be requested.

“Une Mousse” or “Une binouze” in France. “Bironga” in Mexico and “Pi Jiu” in Mandarin. In Eastern Europe, the Baltics and Russia, it is called “Pivo” or “Piva”, and in Scandinavia, ask for an “öl.”

Enjoy!

An Evening of Beer and Tapas

Written by Aj Mal on . Posted in Food & Drink.

Taking place in Spinningfields’ sophisticated Spanish venue, the recently opened authentic restaurant Iberica held a Beer and Tapas evening, which allowed an escape from an icy February eve, and immersion into the world and flavours of renowned Spanish beer master Casimiro Mahou.

The evening kicked off with an introduction to the history and development of artisan Spanish beer in the atmospheric upstairs dining area of Iberica, which contrasts with the expansive and lively bar area.

Three gourmet Beers where enjoyed, each inspired by Casimiro Mahou, a pioneer who dreamed of creating outstanding beer in wine-dominated Spain. These beers are currently unique to Iberica, and not available anywhere else, which is a pity given their lush, palate-pleasing flavours.

The golden foamy wheat beer, Marcenado, had a malty honeyed flavour. We were advised on a method to enjoy the intense flavours and scents. This involved swirling the beer with your hand over the glass, in order to allow scents to build, and then inhaling. This, however, has left me now unable to drink without automatically cupping, swirling, and sniffing my drinks—not to be attempted with hot coffee!

Recommended accompanying tapas avoided the confusion in selecting the right combinations when faced with a huge menu full of choice and variety.

Shunning the ever popular and well known tapas dishes, we were instead treated to Iberica’s signature Serrano ham croquettes, with a delicate moreish flavour that complemented the beer perfectly.

The Maravillas lager was described as representing the entrepreneurial spirit of Casimiro Mahou, and had a stronger, more citrus flavour, with a hint of caramel.

This was accompanied by the fantastic asparagus, manchego, and onion confit on a rich truffle oil toast. This was a stark contrast to many of the tapas dishes we have come to know, and had a strong and multi-layered flavour that would make it the perfect accompaniment to any beer. Definitely one I would like to try again, and plates were rapidly cleared.

The final beer of the evening was the vibrant red coloured Jacometrezo. Dedicated to originality, it certainly achieved this with its sweet yet spicy flavour and rich beige foam.

The beers were all served with specific glasses suited to allow full experience of their rich flavours, and were all served at their ideal temperatures.  A warm beer is perhaps a good beer, and we were warned that beers which you are advised to drink only at very cold temperatures are so in order to disguise poor quality!

Not wanting to finish there and with our appetites stirred, Iberica’s bar menu was perused for more tasty treats.

Served in the high ceilinged and wildly decorated bar area, the punchy flavour of Padron peppers, and the lingering, garlic aroma of fried chorizo lollipops in pear alioli, were washed down with the best Sangria I have ever tasted, made with cucumber and mint, and one of four varieties available.

This relative newcomer to the city is already massively popular in London as a venue for top end, authentic, and high quality Spanish food, and it was a rare treat to enjoy such a varied feast of food and drink. Delicately crafted food and drinks, rich with complex flavours, left everyone wanting more.

The Pilcrow Pub

Written by Evie Horsell on . Posted in Arts.

On a crisp and sunny Friday morning in Manchester I found myself in the heart of Castlefield surrounded by industrial Victorian warehouses. In one of these sites is Joe Hartley’s workshop, now serving as the heart and development centre for the exciting community-spirited project, The Pilcrow Pub.

In this dusty, dynamic and creative workspace are the team behind the project that is soon to be built in NOMA, behind Manchester Victoria. The aim for this venture, as the brains behind the idea Ben Young explains, is to create a pub, therefore a social welcoming space, which has been supported by the best of Manchester craftsmen. In turn this site will also house multiple workshops specialising in true craft skills, such as workshops in wood and ceramics, skills that have been eclipsed by technology for the youth of Manchester.

Photo: The Pilcrow Pub

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So why a pub? As Ben enthusiastically addresses, for him and his team it is the first original social network; the pub is the heart of a neighbourhood. By creating a pub there is the hope to create a community, a hope to create a welcoming, earthy, and completely inclusive space.

These ideas are already evident in the pub accents that have been created in previous workshops, from bar taps that have all been individually sculpted, to the bar cornices that have been fashioned to form the shape of a pilcrow, a paragraph sign. There is no control over who will design the space; the pub is constantly in transition depending on new creative activities and involvement.

So what can this pub do for us students? Aside from the obvious fact that it serves alcohol! Building the actual pub starts in a couple of weeks and once constructed the workshops will be open to anyone, with any level of skills. So if you’re hoping to learn a new skill aside from your degree or wanting to revisit a previous one, this pub is the place. The team are sure to make anyone feel welcome and confident in your abilities; I was only there for ten minutes before I started creating my own journal using traditional techniques and fabulous local materials, such as paper from G. F. Smith.

Photo: The Pilcrow Pub

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am sure that this community-spirited, wholesome, and visionary drinking hole will be a much welcome addition to Manchester’s famed drinking scene.

Thanks go to Ben Young, Project Leader, Joe Hartley, Head Maker, and to the other helpers and crafters for making me feel so welcome.

To find out more about this designer boozer, or to become part of the 600 volunteering team visit: thepilcrowpub.com

How to: Wear Colour

Written by Perisha Kudhail on . Posted in Fashion & Beauty.

Colour is what makes the fashion world go round. Anna Wintour swears by colour and, in this world of sophistication, we might be being a bit too reliant on the convenience of black. I am not condemning the significance that black plays in all of our outfit choices, but it might be time to put a splash of colour back into our outfits, ready for the spring.

There are so many creative ways to make the most out of colour and so, even if you have never really been a fan, here are a few tips to brighten up your outfit.

You don’t have to ditch the black

Just because colour season is here, don’t feel pressurised to ditch the black. Wearing the right accessories is a great way to add a colourful zing. Try a black base with a block-coloured shoe (red is always a favourite), then team this up with a matching clutch and lipstick.

The bigger the better

For those of you who are more accustomed to colour, spring is the best time to experiment with shades that suit you. For the spring, colourful prints are a fantastic way to put that edge back into your closet. Be careful not to overload and clash two opposing prints; the bigger one pattern is, the more wow it’ll have.

The colour is underneath

By using a coloured base with a block colour on top, you are adding colour in a very subtle but stylish way. From coloured socks with black shoes, to a coloured vest top underneath a cardigan, there’s always a way to add a ping to your outfit.

Keep within the same palette

As a general rule for wearing a variety of colour, it’s always best to stick to the same palette. If you are wearing pastel pink, you could tastefully pair it with a dark pink item. With this simple rule, you can compose an outfit that will help you pull off colour with ease.

Don’t be scared to experiment

Not all palettes are for everyone; you need to experiment with different tones and colours to find out what suits you. Different skin tones pull off different colours in different ways. Darker skins tones tend to pull off warmer tones beautifully and paler skin tones pull off royal colours really well. Of course, you’ll never know if you don’t try…

7 of the very best in budget beauty

Written by Rebecca Thomas on . Posted in Fashion & Beauty.

Homemade Foodie Lip Balm

Anyone with an experimental streak and a passion for natural ingredients is able to capitalise on this sneaky trick. You can allegedly make tinted lip balm using one teaspoon of extra virgin olive oil, mixed with any one of the following crushed ingredients: one raspberry, three blackberries, three cherries, or the juice from three pomegranate seeds. Mix well, strain, and play around with quantities to find the perfect recipe. If you can master the best ratio for you, then you have discovered a lifetime of chemical-free, dirt-cheap lip care. Life is balmy.

False Eyelashes: Swapping the Falsies for Baby Powder

This trick is best approached with caution, but does work; baby powder used between mascara coats makes eyelashes look thicker. The method is to curl eyelashes as usual, apply one coat of mascara, and then, taking a cotton wool bud dipped in baby powder, coat lashes until they look ashy grey. Add another coat of mascara to finish off.

Vaseline Perfume Setter

The tub of miracles has a lesser known use alongside its many moisturising purposes. Applying a dab of Vaseline to skin prior to spraying perfume on the site helps to lock the scent in and make it last much longer.

Nivea Men Post Shave Balm: as Good as a High End Primer

YouTube beauty mogul Nikkietutorials introduced the online populace to this trick after running out of her own moisturiser and using the next best thing in her boyfriend’s bathroom cabinet. She used Nivea Men Post Shave Balm under her makeup and was impressed by how unaltered it looked ten hours later. Use it like a normal primer and wait for it to go slightly tacky before applying makeup—I can testify that it lives up to the hype. Beauty bloggers claim the high amount of Glycerine it contains is what makes it so effective. The best news is that it costs less than a fiver and smells delish.

Starbucks Napkins

This is a great tip for managing oily skin—Starbucks napkins function well as alternatives to blotting paper. The freebie napkins have developed such a cult following for their blotting paper qualities, that they even have their own page on MakeupAlley.

Steam Facial

This beauty hack costs virtually nothing and feels like a deep pamper session. Remove all makeup, bring a few cups of water to the boil, and leave in a bowl. Drape a towel over your head so you look like a Dementor and then steam for ten minutes with your eyes closed, finishing the treatment with another cleanse and moisturise .

Argan Oil Foundation

Argan oil or, alternatively, coconut oil, can be bought online for very little expense and has many beauty enhancing properties. It can be used as deep treatments and is the current trend for making super glowy foundation. A drop can be added to any oil-based foundation and it will make the skin glow—this is best for people with dry skin but powder can be applied to the T-zone so that the glow is in the correct places.

Review: Endgame

Written by Georgia Peyser on . Posted in Theatre.

A classically British beach scene—with children playing and pensioners lounging in deck chairs—lifts up and reveals a harsh industrial box that appeared to be at the bottom of a dark cavernous pit. This is the setting for HOME and Citizens Theatre’s production of End Game by Samuel Beckett.

Endgame is centred around the demanding and wheelchair-bound Hamm (David Nielson) and his begrudging carer Clov (Chris Gascoyne), as they go through the motions of living in a post­-apocalyptic wasteland, watching their food slowly dwindle, and waiting to die.

Nielson and Gascoyne, both of Coronation Street fame, play well off of each other. With their bickering exchanges being highlights of the play, along with their use of physical comedy, they really elevated the lighter moments in Beckett’s often morbid script.

Other moments of light relief came from the humorous appearances of Hamm’s parents, Nagg and Nell, played wonderfully by Peter Kelly and Barbara Rafferty respectively. They reminisce about their past travels, whilst being reduced to living in dustbins. Their sweet and loving relationship provide a nice contrast to that of Hamm and Clov’s.

Clov’s use of physical motifs was effective in bringing the audience a sense of the repetition and mundanity of their lives in the short time we spent with the characters. Gascoyne gave a strong performance as Clov, bringing vulnerability to a character that could have easily been interpreted as simply bitter. This really helped the audience to understand why Clov hadn’t left the unpleasant Hamm, or just killed him off as he requested. Some of the most moving parts of the play were when Clov treated Nagg and Nell’s bins with such a tenderness that we saw the characters longing for love and family.

Where I felt the play fell short was in some of Hamm’s longer speeches, where it was sometimes unclear what was supposed to be an aside and what the other characters were aware of. This made these moments the least engaging, which is unfortunate, as they contained some of the more profound ideas in the play. Also, the fleeting moments in the dialogue where Hamm is affectionate towards Clov didn’t really hit home, making the conclusion of the play less moving than it had the potential to be.

That being said, the excellent use of a ticking clock in the encroaching darkness made it a poignant ending all the same, and perhaps Nielson and Gascoyne’s Coronation Street following will introduce a new audience to Beckett’s work.

Floating Points – A Tale of Two Sets

Written by Will Baldwin-Pask on . Posted in Music.

Like a descending prophet, Floating Points (real name Sam Sheppard) brought the ambient genius of his new LP, Elaenia, to Manchester’s The Ritz last month—one of only a handful of UK dates the universally praised electronic composer offered. As if the people of Manchester weren’t lucky enough, he went and played a 4 hour DJ set at Hidden straight after—a gentle reminder of his masterful talent as producer and mixer. His marathon sessions behind decks have been described as “brainy but banging” whilst Elaenia’s critical acclaim includes a number one spot in Resident Advisor’s album of the year list. It’s fair to say then that both the DJ and live set possessed equal promise. And it had me thinking about a somewhat generational conundrum. Given the growing populism of electronic music and the proliferation of festival culture when it comes to promotion through touring, certain producers have been dragged, kicking and screaming, out of the depths of the basement club and into the neon painted sunlight. The appearance of the name  ‘live’ next to the name of artists who make a great deal of their work sat behind a computer has become extremely common and some have managed to make a better show out of their work than others. So which is better? The somewhat contrived spectacle or the all together less showy and yet more truthful DJ set? After various confusions with multiple people about tickets and timings and that, I ended up with the chance to decide in the case of IDM’s new golden boy Sam Shepard. Here’s how they stacked up:

Set Structure
Despite a reputation for hauling an 11-piece orchestra around, there were only three others on stage with Floating Points when he emerged onstage. You wouldn’t know it though, as heaps of effects accompanying each instrument expanded the sounds way beyond classical capabilities. The band glided and thrashed through the album in its entirety without rest, nailing the soft bits just as well as the hard. Such strict adherence to the dynamics of the record was however, lost on an audience that swallowed up the quieter musical moments in a tide of conversation; which frankly felt a bit embarrassing. Ending on a blistering ‘Peroration Six’, the just-under-an-hour set also fell short of satisfying those who were expecting a night’s worth of entertainment. The same can’t be said for the DJ set however. He stormed through 4 hours of relentless funk house, setting the crowd free whilst trapping them in kick-drums and handclaps. The pulse built brilliantly and although he ended at 3am, the crowd this time seemed happily danced to shit.

Winner: DJ set

Visuals
Several times at The Ritz, I am told—and consequently tell others, too, through small talk—that the technical visuals for Floating Points’ sets are arranged by Sheppard himself. True or not, this is easy to believe. The band performed in front of a shape-shifting display of sizzling green lines, as if one of those festival pricks with the laser pens finally took a degree in fine art. Though the strobes started out at a comfortable level of epilepsy, they did start to feel over-used. This didn’t stop The Ritz feeling like some space-based technicolour orgy in complete sync with the sounds filling it, however. The quality of visuals at The Ritz was a tough act for Hidden to follow and, unfortunately, it became a sort of underwhelming sci-fi sequel, as the lone Sheppard was washed in red and fog whilst everyone else bounced around in mostly darkness. This is not necessarily bad—the music drove the evening suitably without the need of extensive lighting and managed to show everyone the going-ons behind the decks—but nothing can compare to the burning laser tattoo guns at The Ritz.

Winner: Live set

Tunes
If you listen out for a single corner being cut in the live set, you won’t find it. Each musician is clinical enough to be a genius in their own right. ‘Argente’ and ‘Silhouettes (I, II & III)’ in particular stood out for their identifiable melodies and overflowing build-ups, swelling and pressing against each of the four walls and everything within them. This music is a perfectionist’s dream, with a degree of detail that would have Michelangelo in front of crowd, gurning his face off. You could hear the micro-rhythms, the tremors of instruments that weren’t even onstage. You could hear every artist influencing the young man’s incomprehensible music taste. It’s Brahms. It’s Miles Davis. Above all, it’s something that hasn’t come before. This contrasts dramatically with the Hidden soundtrack, pumping the sound of the ’70s down young throats via disco, funk, fast jazz and house. Not a single song was recognised and not a single song went un-danced to; as sole-burning as it was soulful. At times it did feel slightly safe though, whereas the deep end performance of the live set succeeded for its audacity. As hard as the DJ set tried, there is something truly special about the music at the live performance that elevated Floating Points as a composer onto a level above the rest.

Winner: Live set

The Man Himself
This is a tricky one. There is something sweet about Sheppard’s minimal crowd interaction in the live set (he says “thank you” an impressive two times in the whole thing), resembling a school child who’s won a prize for their Year 6 science display; proud yet shy, he doesn’t need to get distracted from his work’s quality by giving us personality. The man at Hidden, however, was something else. Anyone who has seen Floating Points DJ knows how into it he gets, and he pulled as many of the stops out that night as ever. His gyrating ginger head enjoyed itself in a way that it didn’t at the live set: without the nerves of facing a full-capacity audience and no longer limited by his music’s own ambience, Floating Points went as mad as his reserved demeanour would allow. The difference was that the crowd followed suit. Everyone felt how good a time he was having. In the end it went down to who you’d rather have at a party, the mad scientist or the square. At one point I caught full sight of him grinning and squinting as he dropped the filter; from then on, I know who I’d invite.

Winner: DJ set

So, what have you got. The meticulous beauty of Elaenia, transposed without flaw to a live set up, and a roaring session at Hidden that left everyone smiling—even Sheppard himself. But what you really got was an insight into the two sides of the neuroscience Phd student: the live performance—the masterpiece, the grand unveiling of his life’s work—and the DJ stint, which was the fun on the side, the late night experiment of creating a light show using optogenetic brain patterns. It was unclear which one Floating Points himself loves more, but I have a sneaking suspicion that, when he strolled off that stage to the cheers of 1,500 people, he thought: “Get me the fuck on those decks.”

Cameron’s reforms are a distraction from greater issues

Written by Tristan Parsons on . Posted in Opinion.

Our victorious leader, David Cameron, emerged from the negotiating table, resisting what must have been drooping eyes from the long hours—as emphasised by many of our media outlets. I respect that Mr. Cameron had been pushed into a corner. The EU referendum is the referendum that no Tory ever wanted to hold.

However, in crude terms, the “special status” secured as a result of his “fighting for Britain” pandered to concerns about migrants’ “burden” on the welfare system, and immigration more generally. Yes, the block on further incursions on our sovereignty is good news, but it doesn’t address the current problems. And interestingly, it has quietly protected the City of London from regulation, and even demanded that the EU as a whole take further steps to deregulate its financial markets (see, 2008 crash for more details).

But let’s have some perspective. We aren’t in the Euro-zone and we aren’t in Schengen. We are a peripheral state in the EU. The continent has issues that are far more pressing.

To bust a myth, the Commission is not completely undemocratic. The appointment process of the President of the Executive Branch draws the most criticism, but this was—in theory—changed in 2014. A more accurate description of the EU would be that it has a ‘democratic deficit’. Turnout to EU votes are low, and there is indeed, the risk that current cracks in the organisation’s democratic nature could be exploited in the future. Indeed, some particularly passionate politicians, such as Viviane Reding—then Vice President of the European Commission in 2014—desire an increased degree of political union: a federal United States of Europe.

For now, the concerning elements of the EU are not its internal organisational problems—though they may be attributed to helping to cause other problems. The prime example of EU failure is Greece. The Greek socialist party, Syriza, has been a major force politics since 2011—with increasing prominence in democratic mandate. Both the EU and much of the press have continually ignored the voices and condition of the people of Greece, with the justification of maintaining ‘sensible’ austerity policies.

This ignorance of democracy in Greece highlights the central problem of the European project. The EU and the Eurozone have created a situation where an entire continent is subjected to the mismatch between centralised monetary policies and the attempts to maintain state-led fiscal and political policies. Those such as Yanis Varoufakis describe this as a way of maximising profit for Europe’s most wealthy nations at the expense of the less wealthy.

This may be the central economic issue, but it is not the most newsworthy. When Russia annexed Crimea, western media labelled as an act of Russian tyranny and aggression on the border of Europe. The same was said when Russian forces began to enter into East Ukraine. However, what the commentators failed to note was the contribution of the EU in the situation. It was the EU that acted first in trying to further relations between itself and Ukraine. The crux of this desire to have greater geo-political control came when the USA-EU supported near neo-Nazi party Svoboda, and declared that a ‘democratic’ overthrow had occurred. Of course Russian aggression was partly to blame, but the EU is in blatant denial of this example, of its desires for expansionism.

Another problem is the continuing desire to draw Turkey into the European Union. As Turkey is a US ally, it would no doubt be useful for those interests. It would secure relations that help to regulate pipelines, trade routes, and Russian access to the Mediterranean Sea. In what appears to be a part of a furthering of relations, Turkey is currently being paid by the EU to help keep migrants away from sacred European soil. To give some context, Turkey is still violent against the Kurdish ethnic group, and even the EU itself admits that in the country’s 2015 elections, “principles of democracy were undermined”.

Then, of course, there is TTIP (The Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership). A secretive ‘free-trade’ agreement is being negotiated between the USA and the European commission. It is suggested that when eventually passed the project will have the power of bypassing national laws in favour of corporate interests.

The issues that the EU faces are abstract and hard to summarise, but one thing is clear: whilst the British people will discuss the implications of Brexit and the reforms that Cameron has achieved, there are wider issues that need addressing. Here lies the problem. With the turnouts of European elections being so low, and their use often being that merely of the protest vote—there is little opportunity for the people of Europe to question the European Union directly. Although we are a peripheral state to the issues mentioned above, perhaps Cameron’s reforms show that politicians are unlikely to look beyond their national interests. In that case, the only powerful method for ‘changing’ the EU—for whatever reason— is the gradual fragmentation of the European Union by the independent exits of its member states. That spells a frightening future, unless there is to be a united movement for major change.

Jeremy Corbyn is driving Labour to oblivion

Written by Edward Bains on . Posted in Opinion.

Oh what a wondrous day September the 12th, 2015 seemed. A rebirth of the left! A victory for democracy! A new dawn for Britain’s long-dormant political opposition! In fact, the day after Jeremy Corbyn’s election to the Labour leadership, I (and many thousands of others) went and signed up to be a member of the Labour Party.

Six months later, and it’s like we’ve been living through one never-ending car crash. A car crash that has utterly discredited the left and seemingly extinguished all serious opposition to Tory rule in England.
It would be easy to blame all of this on an admittedly highly biased right wing press that had it out for him from day one (which it did). But really, the blame lies with Corbyn, who has shown himself to be one of the most hopelessly incompetent leaders of any political party in recent history. Which in retrospect, we all should have expected (indeed, many did), from a man who had never led anything larger than the Harringey Planning Committee. And I say this not as a Tory or a Blairite, but as someone firmly on the left, who despises austerity and still believes in many of the policies that Jeremy Corbyn advocates.

It started virtually on day one, with the Shadow Cabinet reshuffle. A commendable overall gender balance, but a deeply disappointing presence of women in the top roles. Were there simply not enough women who were competent to do these jobs? Well, John McDonnell is clearly so competent to be Shadow Chancellor that he signs petitions calling for the abolition of MI5, and then uses “I didn’t read it” as a defence. Yes, let’s trust him with being in charge of economic policy.

Next came the U-turn on the fiscal charter—George Osborne’s rule committing the government to running a budget surplus by 2018. Ignoring the advice of both left wing and right wing economists (and indeed, anyone with any education in economics whatsoever), Corbyn decided to support it—before ultimately seeing sense and dropping it, willingly jumping into a trap that succeeded in its desired goal of making the Labour leadership look like a bunch of clowns.

After this, there came a brief respite, with the victory over tax credits. We hoped this might be a turning point, and now Labour would get it’s act together.

It was not to last, for along came the Paris attacks. It doesn’t matter how much of a pacifist you are, no sane human being goes on television the day after a terrorist attack and says they aren’t prepared to use lethal force against terrorists. This totally moronic act has succeeded in convincing the entire British public—with good reason—that this man, and by association, the left as a whole, can’t be trusted with our security.

A few weeks later, there was the unmitigated disaster that was the free vote on Syria. Instead of granting the free vote everyone knew he would have to give, he dithered over it for weeks, going behind his colleagues’ backs and sowing mistrust and discord in his own ranks. He thus turned a story that should have been about the fate of millions of Syrians into a story about his own failure to lead.

The New Year was opened with another new crisis. Corbyn’s team spent weeks spreading rumours about a supposed upcoming ‘revenge reshuffle’ in which he would conduct a Maoist purge of Shadow Cabinet Opposition. He even began this reshuffle the same day as launching his campaign for a renationalised railway, thus utterly eclipsing what should have been a very popular policy announcement. Oh, and then he completely bottled the reshuffle. Fantastic.

Not long after, Corbyn decided he wanted to impose a power-sharing agreement on the Falkland Islands with Argentina. What better way to draw attention to all the harm being done by the Tory government than to distract everyone with a ridiculous foreign policy announcement that no one in this country even agrees with. It’s insulting to everyone who died in the Falklands War. What’s more, it’s a reflection of his overarching worldview—one that is sadly echoed in many other left-wing parties and organisations—which can be summed up as ‘it’s nobody’s fault but ours’. It’s what leads him to naively suggest that we can ‘negotiate’ with ISIS, or that Putin would be kinder to us if we simply held more dialogue with him. Again, this was another thing we should have expected from his history. We were, to our shame, willing to forgive and perhaps even overlook some of his past associations (such as referring to Hamas as his ‘friends’) when we gave him our support for the leadership. Although in fairness, they were no worse than the ones David Cameron makes on a daily basis—like when he bowed down to homosexual-executing Saudi royals, or dined out with the leaders of the arms trade and Rupert Murdoch.

However, perhaps his greatest personal shortcoming is exposed in the weekly public humiliation that is Prime Minister’s Questions (PMQs). Or as it’s now better known, ‘Everyone Rips Labour Leader For 30 Minutes’. Reading out messages from the public was a nice idea at first, but after a while, you start to feel that he’s deferring his own responsibility to ask questions and confront the Prime Minister, for Corbyn is actually totally averse to dealing with confrontation. It’s one of the reasons tensions within his party go unresolved for so long. This is a fatal characteristic for anyone hoping to lead anything.

Oh, and there have now been two PMQs that coincided with the Junior Doctors’ strikes. And he couldn’t bring himself to bring it up at either one. A total betrayal.

The polling is dire. Really dire. There are elections in May. If Labour fail to make any gains or even stay in the same place, it means they have done worse than Ed Miliband—a man who lost. Badly. Given that the Tories are imploding over Europe, and voters are meant to be repelled by divided parties, any result for Labour other than overwhelming success will essentially be a total failure.

If Corbyn is even half the decent and principled man that I still believe he is deep down, he will not attempt to use Sadiq Khan’s victory in London as a defence, and will (presumably after the referendum) accept that he has failed and step down. If he isn’t, then we best hope that his MPs are brave enough to depose him and that the new members aren’t stupid enough to defend him.

Time is short. Labour, the left, the centre, the voters, the millions of people suffering at the hands of a vicious Tory Government—England deserve better than this. They deserve a real Opposition, one that stands a chance of one day replacing the current government. Corbyn is not remotely up to the job of leading this, and everyone in Labour (including him) needs to wake up to this fact soon and do something about it. If we don’t, we are in effect surrendering the country to the Tories for years to come.

And yes, in case you can’t tell, I’m very disillusioned.

An ode to my winter wardrobe

Written by Kassi Allcock on . Posted in Fashion & Beauty.

Winter has never been my favourite time of the year; the temperatures are sub-zero, the gale force winds are ferocious, and the rain never stops falling from the dimly lit sky. Despite this, my winter wardrobe has always been my most treasured, full to the brim with oversized jumpers and blanket-sized scarves. You know what they say—sweater weather is better weather, and I live by this mantra for the first three months of the year.

Now that winter is finally drawing to a close, with March 20th being the official first day of spring, I am left with mixed feelings. On the one hand, summer is but a mere leap, skip, and bound away, meaning beautiful flowery dresses and sunglasses galore. On the other hand, however, I’m not ready to be torn away from my beloved winter wardrobe just yet. I’m not willing to be dressed in spring pastels; I would much rather remain in my constant state of black, with the occasional pop of colour in the shape of my favourite red plaid scarf. As the inevitable will shortly ensue, I will wave off my esteemed attire with a tear in my eye and a lump in my throat, longing for our next hello.

To the fluffy socks that have hugged my feet all winter long and to the black Chelsea boots that have hidden away my fashion faux pas: Thank you for supporting me through all of the atrocious weather that the last three months have thrown at us. To the crimson scarf that has been constantly wrapped around my neck: thank you for being my safety blanket and for shielding me from Manchester’s wind. To the earmuffs that have been permanently attached to my head: Thank you for preventing my ears from sporting a (not so) dashing shade of rosy red. To all of the jumpers that have been hidden beneath layer upon layer: Thank you for keeping me warm and snuggly when forced to remove my coat.

Thank you to the gloves, thank you to the coats, and thank you to the array of beautiful winter colours that have encompassed my wardrobe. As I bid you all farewell, you will be sorely missed. But fret not—we will be reunited soon. Spring may be within sight but, with the constant arctic weather that accompanies living in England, I will always have an excuse to dive back into my cherished winter fashion.